Comfort and Rapport Notes I. Basic Principles
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a. Build a feeling of mutual connection on an emotional level
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b. This is where you can have ‘normal” conversation and ask questions like “what do you do?” c. Talk about a wide variety of topics as opposed to talking about one subject in detail d. Don’t make your conversation into an interview. Tell her stories in order to get her to tell you about herself
! e. Takes place in isolation ! ! II. Verbal Rapport ! ! !
a. Build trust and empathy through emotional intensity Ex: “You know life is all about moments….some moments are good mo ments, some moments are really good moments, and some moments are not so good. This moment right here, I feel is a good moment” b. Talk about career and work, hobbies and interests, worldviews and principles, life goals, friends and family, relationship history. Ex: “I like to travel, and what I do allows me to do so, what about you?” c. Female friendly topics: fashion, pop culture, relationships
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d. Ask questions and relate (you’ve done it, you’ve never done it, or you know someone who’s done it) e. Ask more emotional questions, rather than logical questions f. Show your vulnerable side g. Ask interesting questions Ex: “Would you rather be on a train, dance in the rain, or feel no pain? Ex: “If you were on a desert island would you rather have a pad and a pen or a musical instrument?”
III. Non-Verbal Rapport
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a. Doing activities together
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b. Venue changing and moving around the venue 1. Isolation (getting her alone with you): - Get her friends to comply Ex: “So tell me about Sara” Ex: “Sara’s pretty interesting, what’s the catch?” - Use humor Ex: “Sara’s kidnapping me! Does she do this to all the guys?” Ex: “I’m borrowing her for 2 seconds, what do I feed her?”
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2. Micro Logistical Rapport: - Moving her around the venue - Doing activities together (taking shots, dancing, playing games)
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3. Macro Logistical Rapport: - Moving her (or her group) to a new venue or going on an instant date with her
c. Seeing each other and communicating regularly
! d. Face her and maintain eye contact especially when you are listening ! ! IV. Advanced !
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a. Deep Rapport - Talk about your passion and purpose and get her to open up and share her passions. Compliment her passion and/or purpose and relate it back to yours. Example: You: “What thing that you haven't yet done would you most like to do?” Her: “I want to start a charity” You: “Wow that’s awesome, I knew you have this save the world vibe about you, which is really cool because I’m the same way because…” b. Cold Reading - Telling her something about herself that she may or may not have known
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i. “You seem like you are X, but really you are Y, I know because I am the same way”
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Ex: “You seem like the type that goes along with what others think, but really you are totally independent, I know this because I’m the same way” ii. Female truisms – things that are true about most hot women Ex: guys give them what they want, guys stalk them, they can’t find a good man, most dates they go on are lame, etc. Ex: “I bet you go on a quit a few dates, and I bet you like the guy at first, but then after the 1st or 2nd date you lose all attraction for her…and you don’t know why”
! V. Advanced NLP (for the advanced NLP guys) !
“Do you believe in love at first sight? I don’t believe in love at first sight either but I do believe that you can feel an instant connection with someone and feel completely comfortable and relaxed but still have excitement and anticipation that builds up and increases with little looks (head tilt) and little touches (touch her)”
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“Are you decisive? “Do you know what you want when it’s right in front of you?” (Self point) “Imagine what it would be like to get it and then go for it without hesitation. Or would you let opportunities slip away?” (lean away).
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“I’m just curious, we all have passions in life in things we do, what turns you on, your thing what would it be? (LET HER TALK) So what is that makes you attracted to this? When you are ______do you really enjoy yourself, what happens when you ______? It’s amazing when you are having an experience _________.
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There was something adorable that happened to you when you were talking about ________. You seem like the type of person that just goes for something you like…me I’m the same way.”
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You tell her there are 3 things you like about her, the first is some kind of mannerism, like the way she walks or something. Second is something she says or has said that you liked. Then third you say... ''If I were to tell you (pause) you will become conscious of it (pause) and stop doing it (pause) So I CAN'T tell you.”
! ! VI. Bonus: The Super Sexualized Version of Cajun’s Question Game ! Rules:
1. You can’t ask the same question twice 2. If you refuse to answer a question, you lose 3. You’re allowed one follow-up question
4. “I go first”
! ! Questions to Ask Her: ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
1) How man men have you been with…romantically? –Follow Up: When was the last one? 2) What was your longest relationship? –Follow Up: When did it end? After she asks her second question say: “If I want to win this game, I gotta start asking the tough questions” 3) When was the last time you masturbated? –Follow up: Where was it? Or What where you thinking about? She should try to get revenge with her next question. If she doesn’t ask a sexual question say, “You will never win the game with questions like that, are you sure you want to ask that?” If she doesn’t change her answer then give an emotionless response. 4) Where’s the craziest place you’ve had sex? –Follow up: You gotta tell me that story 5) What’s your favourite position? –Say, “Nice…you and I are going to get along” –Follow up: What’s your sexual fantasy? 6) On a scale from 1-10 how would you rate yourself in the sack? –Follow up: What about oral? 7) Are you a good kisser? (be sitting beside her, ideally on your bed) –Any response, kiss her. Then keep escalating or whisper, “ask me another question” or “your turn” as you continue kissing her 8) On a scale from 1-10 how wet are you right now? –Anything over 7 you just go for that –Anything less than 7 say, “well we gotta fix that”
VII. Infield Assignments
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1. Ask comfort questions and really get to know at least 1 girl that you approach this week.
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a. Day game: If you meet during the day then have a conversation that lasts more than 5 min. in which you are building commonalities and relating to her interests b. Night game; If you meet at night, isolate her and have a conversation that lasts more than 10 min. in which you are building commonalities and relating to her interests.
2. Play the Question Game one time this week, either on a date or with a woman that you meet at a bar, club or lounge. You can either play the standard version or the bonuses version provided this week. Attempt to play it at least once this week.
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3. Do at least 7 approaches this week and write the positive results down in your success journal.
