Section 1

Tantric Sextasy

*5 Sexually Decadent Days of Orgasmic Mastery*

Table of Contents Table of Contents Contents ............................................................................... ii Important Important Notes .................................................................................v All Rights Reserved..........................................................................v For Educational Purposes Only .......................................................v An Introduction Introduction to Tantric Sextasy Sextasy (5 Sexually Sexually Decadent Decadent Days of of Orgasmic Mastery Await Await You…).......................................................... 7 So, Why Tantric Sextasy?.................................................................7 The Goal of Tantric Sextasy ............................................................. 7 Why Tantric Sext asy Works for Men .......................................... ...................................................................................... ............................................... ... 9 Why Tantric Sext asy Works for Wo men ........................................... ................................................................................. ...................................... 10 Tantric Terms Instead of ‘Sexual Slang’............................................ Slang’ ................................................................................... ....................................... 11 How to Navigate the Pages of Tantric Sextasy ......................................... ......................................................................... ................................ 11

A Quick Overview Overview of Tantric Tantric Sextasy Sextasy – Just a Peak to Get Your Sexual Juices Juices Flowing!................................................................... Flowing!................................................................... 12 Tantric Sextasy Day 1................................................................................................................12 Tantric Sextasy Day 2 ........................................... ....................................................................................... ....................................................................13 ........................13 Tantric Sextasy Day 3 ........................................... ....................................................................................... ....................................................................13 ........................13 Tantric Sextasy Day 4 ........................................... ....................................................................................... ....................................................................14 ........................14 Tantric Sextasy Sext asy Day 5............................................ 5 ........................................................................................ ....................................................................14 ........................14

DAY 1 Private Session: How to Prepare Your Mind and Body for the Most Intense, Intense, Gut-Wrenching Gut-Wrenching Sexual Pleasures Pleasures of Your Life ............ 16 Chapter 1: What What is Tantric Sextasy? Sextasy? .................................................. 17 A Look into into the O-Zone O-Zone (the (the Continuous Continuous Orgasm Zone)................. Zone)................. 17 Do You Dare to Enter the O-Zone? ............................................ ........................................................................................ ..............................................19 ..19

Let’s Start from the Beginning… Where and How Did You Learn About Sex? Sex? .................................................................................... 20 The American Businessman and the Mexican Fisherman...................................................... 22 The Tantric Sextasy Doctrine – Sexual Pleasure is a Priority................................................. 24 Do You Really Want More Out of Life? ..................................... .................................................................................. ............................................... 24 Start a Sexploration Journal Now! ............................................. ......................................................................................... .............................................. 25 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: What’s Your Sexuality Background? ...................................... ........................................ .. 26

Tantric Sextasy 101 ....................................................................... 26 Achieving the th e Summit of Sexual Sexu al Sextasy .......................................... ................................................................................ ...................................... 27 You are Now a Student of Spiritual Sex ............................................ ..................................................................................2 ......................................2 8 Is the Tantric Sextasy Ritual for You? ....................................... .................................................................................... ............................................... 30 The Best Way to Learn the Secrets of Tantric Sextasy.............................................................31 Mind-Blowing Sex is Not Normal.............................................................................................31 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Tantric Sextasy........................................................................ Sextasy.......................................................................... .. 33

The Origins of Tantra.....................................................................33 Tantra – Become the Lover You Were Born to Be .......................................... .................................................................. ........................ 33 Tantra Text – The Oldest Sex Manual..................................................................................... Manual..................................................................................... 34 Tantric Sex and the Kama Sutra......................................... Sutra ..................................................................................... ..................................................... ......... 35

Kama Sutra’s Sutra’s Sixty-F Sixty-Four our Arts ............ .................. ............ ............ ............. ............. ............ ............ ...... 36 Sex Speak Spreads (How Tantra Crossed the Globe) ..................................... ............................................................. ........................ 37 Don't Worry; You're Not Joining a Religion! ........................................... .......................................................................... ............................... 38 Tantric Sextasy Rituals – Sex Routines to Elevate your Sex Skills......................................... 38 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: QUESTIONS : Your Thoughts on Sexuality & Spirituality............................... 39 The Magic of Saraha ..................................... ................................................................................. ........................................................................... ............................... 39 Do You Have a Tantric Attitude?..............................................................................................41 Turn Your Inner ‘Subtle Energy’ to ‘Orgasmic Energy’ .......................................... .......................................................... ................ 42 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Your Capacity for Orgasmic Pleasure....................................... 43

© 2008 Gabrielle Moore, Somraj Pokras & Jeffrey TallTrees, Ph.D

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Chapter 2: Tantric Sex Attitude - How You Think in Your Head, Affects What What You Do in Bed… .......................................................... 44 The Right Right Tantric Tantric Attitude Attitude is is YES-BE!........................................... YES-BE!........................................... 44 Tantric Sextasy is an Inner Game............................................................................................ Game............................................................................................ 45 Tantric Sextasy – More Than Just Living a Deliriously Sex-Happy Life................................ Life................................ 45 Sex is NOT Bad… It’s Darn Good! ...................................... .................................................................................. ..................................................... ......... 46 Abandon Yourself t o the Pleasure, Pleasure , Let Go, Surrender… ......................................... ......................................................... ................ 47 Do Not Resist, Submit! ......................................... ..................................................................................... ................................................................... ....................... 47

"Y" is for Yesss! ............................................................................ 48 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: QUESTIONS : Inner Acceptance ....................................... ...................................................................... ............................... 49

"E" is for Experiencing Experiencing the the Now with Full Full Awareness Awareness ................... 49 The Heart and Soul of Tantric Sextasy ...................................... ................................................................................... ............................................... 50 Meditation – Empty Your Mind & Fill Your Body with Pleasure ......................................... ............................................5 ...511 SOLO SEXERCISE: Tantric Breathing Basics ......................................... ........................................................................ ............................... 52

"S" is for Self – It’s It’s All About You, You, You! .................................54 Repeat After Me… I’m Better than ‘Good Enough’! ........................................ ................................................................ ........................ 54 The Secret to Improving Your ‘Lovability’ Factor ........................................... ................................................................... ........................ 55 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: I Love Me ............................................ .................................................................................. ...................................... 56 Write Your Own ‘Sel f Story’ ......................................... ..................................................................................... ............................................................ ................ 56 The Capacity for Tantric Sex Has Been Inside You All Along................................................. 57 Nothing is More Important than the Fact that You Feel Good............................................... Good............................................... 58 How to Be ‘Self-Full’ ..................................... ................................................................................. ........................................................................... ............................... 59 Really, What Brings You Pleasure? ............................................ ........................................................................................ .............................................. 60 SOLO SEXERCISE: Tantric Self Loving ........................................... .................................................................................60 ......................................60

"B" is for for Your Body, Your Your Blissful, Blissful, Sexy Body.............................. 62 Your Body, Your Sex Temple Te mple ....................................... ................................................................................... ............................................................ ................ 63 Body TLC Makes for Better Sexual Ecstasy............................................................................. Ecstasy............................................................................. 63 Do You Have What it Takes to be a World-Class Lover? ........................................ ........................................................ ................ 64 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Body Acceptance ........................................ ....................................................................... ............................... 65 Worship Your Bo dy.................................................................... dy................................................................................................................ .............................................. .. 65 SOLO SEXERCISE: Honor Your Body and Hot Sex Will Follow ......................................... ........................................... .. 66 Responsible Sex is Better, Hotter Sex ....................................... .................................................................................... ............................................... 68 Love Your Body/Sex Temple Basics ........................................... ....................................................................................... .............................................. 69

"B" also Means Being in Your Body .............................................. 69 Tantric Orgasms - To Truly FEEL it, Get It Out of Your Head ...................................... ............................................... ......... 70 Use Your Mind to Find the Path to Sexual Ecstasy..................................................................71 SOLO SEXERCISE: Get Our of Your Mind, and Pleasure Will Follow ...................................71 Opening Your Senses ............................................ ........................................................................................ ................................................................... ....................... 72 Be More Sex Sensitive........................................... Sensitive ....................................................................................... ................................................................... ....................... 74 The Sex Sensation Checklist ........................................ .................................................................................... ............................................................ ................ 75 PARTNER SEXERCISE: Sensory Delight ......................................... ............................................................................... ...................................... 76 Emotions are Sexual Energy in Motion ..................................... .................................................................................. ............................................... 81 Honor Your Emotions.............................................................................................................. Emotions.............................................................................................................. 83 YES-BE Helps You H eed Your Guidance System ........................................... ................................................................... ........................ 84 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Handling Your Emotions .......................................... .......................................................... ................ 85 PASSION is the Tantric Way of Living ...................................... ................................................................................... ............................................... 85 SOLO SEXERCISE: Wake Up Your Passions! ......................................... ........................................................................ ............................... 86

"E" is For Enjoying Enjoying Pleasure… Pleasure… NOW!............................................ NOW!............................................ 88 Deferred Gratification Be Damned! ........................................... ....................................................................................... .............................................. 89 The Tantric Way of Life ........................................ .................................................................................... ................................................................... ....................... 90 Try THIS at Home Every Day to Kick Start Your Tantric Life.................................................91 Be Pleasure-Focused Pleasure-Foc used ..................................... ................................................................................. ........................................................................... ............................... 92 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Do I Block Pleasure?!? ...................................... .............................................................. ........................ 93 SOLO SEXERCISE: Putting Pleasure First ....................................... ............................................................................. ...................................... 94 Your Body - A Divine Pleasure Machine Machi ne ........................................... ................................................................................. ...................................... 96


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How Often Do You Masturbate? ............................................................................................. 96 Masturbation vs. Tantric Self-Pleasuring................................................................................ 97 Come Together With More Juice and Less Guilt .................................................................... 99 DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: The Art of Self-Pleasuring ........................................................ 99 Self-Pleasuring – The Way to Increase Your Orgasmic Potential ........................................ 100 Self-Pleasuring Paves the Way to Various Sexual Practices ..................................................101 The Benefits of Self Pleasuring (As If We Need to Convince You!) ...................................... 102 SOLO SEXERCISE: The Tantric Self-Pleasuring Ritual....................................................... 103

YOU are the Tantric Attitude ....................................................... 104 Just Say YES-BE! ................................................................................................................... 104 Sex is a Gift and Any Way You Get It Is Good for You.......................................................... 105 Believe that Following Your Sexual Desires is Good............................................................. 106

Day 1 – Tantric Sextasy Private Session – Closing ...........................108


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Important Notes All Rights Reserved Bona-fide purchasers of this e-course may print one copy of this document for personal use. You can also read it as many times as you want on screen. However, it is NOT legal to store, reproduce, forward, email, or transmit this publication or any part of it in any form or by any electronic, physical, or mechanical means including photocopying, recording, or introduction into any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the copyright owner and the publishers of this e-course. What you CAN use - in fact we want you to use them – are brief quotations in reviews prepared for inclusion in a magazine, newspaper, or broadcast.

For Educational Purposes Only We need to make a few boundaries perfectly clear before you dive into the secrets, tips and tricks that make up Tantric Sextasy . Bear with us before your Tantric sex exploration starts! The material in this e-course is for educational purposes and is intended to provide helpful guidance to lovers about human sexuality. We’ve made every attempt to provide accurate, dependable, up-to-date information and we believe that what's presented here is helpful and poses no risk to any healthy person. This 5-part e-course is sold with the understanding that neither the authors nor the publishers are engaged in rendering medical, nor any other professional service. If you have questions concerning the application of the material and advice described in this e-course and its affect on your health and well-being, it is your responsibility to consult a qualified professional first. Any use of the techniques used in this e-course is at your own risk.


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This e-course is not intended to serve as medical treatment, psychological counseling, psychotherapy, or any other services best performed by a health professional. No part of this e-course should be used as a means of self-treatment or as a viable substitute to or for medical evaluation by a physician. If you suspect you have a condition requiring such treatment, we encourage you to seek professional help before engaging in the practices included. Absolutely no part of the program should cause pain or unusual symptoms. Should such arise during or after doing the practices within, the affected party is advised to seek medical evaluation to identify possible causes. If you have knowledge of or a suspicion that you have contracted a sexually transmitted disease, you are urged to consult with a qualified health professional before engaging in any partner practices described in this e-course. Detailed guidelines about safer and smarter conscious sex are included at the end. The authors and publishers cannot be held responsible for any error, omission, professional disagreement, or outdated material in this e-course. The authors and publishers are not liable for any upsetting reaction, divorce, damage, injury, infection, fatal disease, or other adverse outcome as a result of applying the information or engaging in any activities suggested in this e-course. Well, there it is. All the stuff we have to swear off due to the high levels of conflict in our modern world. Now that you've suffered through all this legal stuff, let the Tantric sexuality secrets that will change your lives forever unfold now!


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An Introduction to Tantric Sextasy (5 Sexually Decadent Days of Orgasmic Mastery Await You…) So, Why Tantric Sextasy? The mere fact that you’ve bought this e-course means that you acknowledge that there is something MORE that can happen in your sex life. MORE passion. MORE fire. MORE orgasms. MORE nerve-wracking sexual pleasures. MORE out-of-body orgasmic ecstasy. Well, you’re right. There IS so much more that your bodies can give you. And that’s why we’ve created Tantric Sextasy . It is THE ultimate sexual guide that will finally enable you to unleash the volcanic orgasmic energy that is currently lying dormant inside you. Tantric Sextasy is not about theories. It’s not spiritual magic. It’s a practical, step by-step guide on how you can harness your orgasmic energy, make it grow inside you, make it flow inside you to various parts of your body and then – when YOU want it to – to make it burst from you in all it’s earth-shattering glory. So… let’s start!

The Goal of Tantric Sextasy Tantric Sextasy wants to support you in being a fully sexual and totally sex positive person. It doesn’t matter if you're a woman or a man, young or old, straight or gay, big or small, single or partnered, white, brown or purple. Tantric Sextasy isn't picky about who it's designed for. You're perfect.


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Tantrikas (Tantra practitioners) know that sexual ecstasy is a divine gift. If you understand that anything that makes you feel good is good for you, then you're half way there. We want you to be able to expand your capacity for pleasure so that your view of the world just gets better and better. We called this e-course Tantric Sextasy because it's a manual for you to learn the following. •

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Merge sex and spirit to bring lovemaking to a whole new soul-searing level; Expand your consciousness as you connect deeply with your inner sexual nature;

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Bring this consciousness into your sexual play;

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Build confidence in your ability to give and receive sexual pleasure;

•

•

•

•

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Fully embrace your sexual birthright, which is ecstatic every time all the time; Reach supreme sexual ecstasy routinely, anytime, any day, any moment; Achieve your full sexual and orgasmic potential; Use highly advanced sexual exercise to become the lover you always wanted to be; and Drastically expand your capacity for sexual pleasure while making it a major priority in life.

To achieve all this, you're going to learn to create a Tantric Sacred Space, to honor yourself and your lover while preparing for all forms of lovemaking. Using the ancient teachings of Tantra and the modern teachings of relationship psychology and couple sexology, you're going to discover multiple new ways to exchange pleasure with your partner. Just as there are many ways to create beautiful music, there's no one right way to make love. In the coming days, you'll learn to widely expand your sexual playlist using approaches that will allow you to feel differently and experience highly erotic wonders you never knew were humanly possible.


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Why Tantric Sextasy Works for Men We know, you may be a little cautious about this Tantra thing. Spiritual rituals aren't the kind of thing ‘metro men’ are drawn to. Weren't you raised with the certainty that you know it all and are always on top of things? Or at least it's your job as a real man to try to always make it look that way. After all, you've learned a lot about sex over the years… or maybe not. Frankly, men vary enormously in their understanding about themselves, about their sexual partners, and about sex and sexual anatomy, generally and specifically. Many men are often caught between believing they're supposed to know everything and worrying that they don't. Whatever the size of your member or your track record in satisfying your lover, you can become the stud that's lurking inside you. There is so much more than sexual technique that you're about to become immersed in. Through this e-course, you'll better understand the secrets of the masculine and feminine spirit and how to worship the sexual forces in your lover. Further, we want to move your sexual awareness beyond the average, beyond the normal, and straight into the realms of ecstatic sex. Expect that soon you'll have mind blowing orgasms, with or without ejaculation, where you'll lose your mind and experience the most indescribable energies. Trust us, what you're going to feel you probably can't even imagine at this point. You see, Tantric Sextasy has something for everyone. It's the ancient, tried and true, "Be all you can be."


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By the way, all this isn't limited by your gender or body type. Though we have adopted the mainstream and often refer to couples as male and female, everything in Tantric Sextasy applies to all sexual preferences and same-sex couples.

Why Tantric Sextasy Works for Women If you're a woman, we want you know that Tantric Sextasy is highly female-oriented. Each woman is the Goddess we call Shakti, the adored, the source of all energy, propulsion and movement. She is the essence of change, evolution and pleasure. You, the woman, are she. Do you believe that intimacy, love, and sex can be more than what you've experienced in the past? We guarantee to help you with that. Above all, we want you to enjoy sex! We want you to know it's good for you. We want you to release your inhibitions, and stop holding back. We want you to remember that being alive means feeling desire, all sorts of desires. You can be the lover you've always dreamed of; you supply the will and the willingness and we know you'll succeed. You can be a dream lover. Maybe you're not sure if you're a very sexual person. Maybe you haven't particularly liked lovemaking the way you've had it. Maybe you've had negative, painful experiences or just plain unsatisfying or unfulfilling experiences. Maybe you haven't been sure how to give pleasure. We want you to know that Tantric Sextasy can be enormously healing. If you've had sexual abuse or sexual trauma in your life, Tantric Sextasy can help to heal those wounds, cleanse your system, and move on with sexual gusto.


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Regardless of your personal sexual history, we're convinced that Tantric Sextasy can introduce you to a whole new up leveling of your sex life, forever.

Tantric Terms Instead of ‘Sexual Slang’ In Tantric Sextasy , you’ll notice that we like to use Tantric terms instead of the "normal" words for sexual parts and actions? Somehow, we find that clinical terms or slang expressions don't create the Tantric mood and approach that makes sex sacred. Here's a short listing of the main Tantric terms we use to help you get familiar. Jewels Vajra Yoni Kundalini Sexual Union Sacred Gate

= = = = = =

Genitals Penis Vagina and vulva Sexual or orgasmic energy Sexual intercourse, a sacred ritual G-Spot, male or female

Of course, our full glossary at the end of the e-course is more complete. But these are the ones we think you really need to know as you move through the e-course. Before we forget, Tantric Sextasy views everyone as a reflection of divine powers. So you'll find us referring to the fair sex as the Goddess or as Shakti and the male sex as God or Shiva. (Much more about this in Chapter 2 later.)

How to Navigate the Pages of Tantric Sextasy Many people print out e-courses so they can read them on paper continuously. If you've already done that, no problem. But this is really a how-to guide rooted in exercises with step-by-step instructions. So an alternative is to read a section on screen, print out the practice directions to follow, do them as many times as you need and want, and then read the next section on screen.


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We've labeled each practice as either SOLO SEXercise or PARTNER SEXercise so you'll recognize what each is designed for. Because Tantra begins as an individual path, partners still need to do the solo exercises. As well, singles can gain a lot from adapting the partner sexercises for their own purposes. Regardless of your situation, we suggest you read each one all the way through before trying or dismissing them. Like most e-courses, we've arranged this volume in a specific order. In short, later stuff builds on earlier stuff. For example, making the most of any turn-on depends on learning the Tantric art of channeling orgasmic energy first. So the further you get in this e-course, the more we'll refer to earlier concepts and skills. This is also why we’ve divided this e-course into five sections to be sent to you in five days. This way, there’ll be no ‘peaking’ on succeeding parts before you’ve had a chance to master the sexercises in current chapters you’re reading. Aren’t we so smart?!?

A Quick Overview of Tantric Sextasy – Just a Peak to Get Your Sexual Juices Flowing! Far be it from us to completely leave you in the dark on what Tantric Sextasy is all about! So here’s a quick look on what you can expect today and the coming days.

Tantric Sextasy Day 1 Chapter 1: Tantric Sextasy Defined In this chapter, you’ll discover just why, exactly, you’re NOT experiencing the best orgasms of your life today. We’ll be touching on the origins not just of Tantric Sex but also of the Kama Sutra and how you can best START

your

journey

to

mind-blowing,


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cascading orgasms. Chapter 2: The Tantric Sex Attitude The beginning of your transformation starts here with the five essential elements of the Tantric Attitude. By reading this chapter you'll understand how to embrace life, yourself, and your sexuality more fully. Tantric Sextasy starts with you getting out of your head and into your body. So we give you powerful practices that can change your mind, your heart, your body, and your soul so you can be everything you want to be.

Tantric Sextasy Day 2 Chapter 3: Tantra is Mental, Emotional and Spiritual Sex Creating attitude, mood, and intention to reach untold delirious heights of ecstasy start here. In this chapter, we get specific about how to enhance your Tantric skills by ‘weaving sexual magic’. It explains how sexual pleasure can be used to transform your life. Chapter 4: Tantric Sacred Space This chapter introduces you to the first element of the Tantric Sextasy Ritual, the Tantric Sacred Space, which includes decorating, dressing, and preparing a sensual environment. Provided are tons of sexual tips for creating your own personal ceremony to cleanse the energy and set the tone for some truly erotic sexual play.

Tantric Sextasy Day 3 Chapter 5: Connecting Hearts Honoring and connecting with your lover is the second stage of the Tantric Sextasy Ritual. This chapter offers many suggestions for making your Tantric experience deeper, more intimate, and yes, more soul-searing! Also, we begin here with a continuing theme that is THE key to great sex so that each sexual encounter is more deliriously decadent than the next.


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Chapter 6: Sexual Meditation The third stage of the Tantric Sextasy Ritual is meditating. If you think this is boring, you’re extremely mistaken. Ecstatic states and ecstatic sex require relaxing your muscles, calming your mind, and fully opening your senses especially when you're high aroused. Through step-by-step sexercises, we teach you how to achieve this kind of relaxation. The meditations we share aren't simply sitting quietly, they're sexually active processes that will help you open your senses, free your energy channels, and speed up the process of becoming the Tantric sex practitioner you want to be.

Tantric Sextasy Day 4 Chapter 7: Orgasmic Energy Flows This chapter is devoted to the fourth element of the Tantric Sextasy Ritual: Tantric breathing. We introduce you to the power of pleasure and kundalini orgasmic energy. We begin by describing the Four Cornerstones of Supreme Bliss and showing you how to use them with a basic Tantric energy practice, Orgasmic Breathing. By mastering the steps of Orgasmic Breathing, you can simulate orgasms so that your mind, body and soul learn to jump into a deliriously erotic state automatically, quickly, and willfully.

Tantric Sextasy Day 5 Chapter 8: Tantric Lovemaking! The Tantric Lovemaking Chapter discusses the fifth stage in the Tantric Sextasy Ritual, which is to create a Tantric ecstatic experience so you can learn to dance and cavort at new levels of sexual excitement and awareness. This means erotic genital massage, oral pleasure, anal play, and dozens of Kama Sutra lovemaking positions! You'll also learn about the different kinds of physical orgasms and how they merge with Tantric Orgasms. Chapter 9: Closing Ritual Space This final stage in the Tantric Sextasy Ritual is all about how you and your lover can maintain the feelings of high-strung, body-wracking ecstasy long after © 2008 Gabrielle Moore, Somraj Pokras & Jeffrey TallTrees, Ph.D

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you guys have reached a climax. Think of it this way: instead of ‘crashing’ after an orgasm, you’ll be able to SLOWLY descend back to earth with your skin still tingling from the rock-hard orgasm (or orgasms) you BOTH just experienced. See you at the end! Remember, say YES to sexual pleasure and you’ll be rewarded – mind, body and spirit – with the most deliriously decadent, intense orgasms ever… To your magnificent sexual awakening!


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DAY 1 Private Session: How to Prepare Your Mind and Body for the Most Intense, Gut-Wrenching Sexual Pleasures of Your Life Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven. - Mark Twain

Chapter 1: What is Tantric Sextasy? In case you're not clear, Tantra is often called sacred sexuality or Spiritual Sex because it's an ancient spiritual practice from the East that uses sexual energy to raise consciousness, build relationship, and transform life. We often call it the spiritual metaphysics of sex, love, and intimacy. So in Chapter 1, we’ll go into detail on the origins of these Eastern sexual cultures and why it’s to your great sexual and orgasmic benefit to learn how to adopt them in your bedroom. We’ll also introduce you to the unique, six-stage framework and approach to Spiritual Sex and Tantric lovemaking, which we call the Tantric Sextasy Ritual.

Chapter 2: The Tantric Sex Attitude In Chapter 2, you’ll learn the Tantric Attitude we call as YES-BE and how to incorporate it into your life and lovemaking. In essence, it’s about saying a big, loud, rock-hard YES! to great sex. If you think that’s easy enough to do, wait till you fully understand what saying yes to great sex means. Don’t worry; we’ll not leave you in the lurch. As promised, we provide actual (but easy!) step-bystep guides to enable you to enjoy sexual pleasure easier, sooner… yet in a more intense, “I-don’t-know-here-I-am”, “I-don’t-even-know-my-name” orgasmic way. Now, let’s start you on your way to high-voltage orgasms, shall we?!?


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Chapter 1: What is Tantric Sextasy? A Look into the O-Zone (the Continuous Orgasm Zone) In today’s world, sex is hurried, the focus all wrong. It’s absurd really, when you think about it. We spend a lot of time thinking about sex, planning sex and even day dreaming about sex, yet when the moment arrives, our focal point is not on the journey… but on the destination. In short, lovemaking has been reduced to reaching the ‘big bang’. But what if there was a way for you to experience sex like never before? What if, instead of feeling high only when you reach your climax, you feel high ALL THE TIME. Imagine, the whole time you’re making love it’s as if you and your lover are in a continuous orgasm zone. You think this is impossible? Not at all! But it is a different sexual way of life. And just to show you how amazing this erotic way of life is, one of our authors – Gabrielle Moore – has volunteered to share with you the following Tantric Sextasy experience. And as always, if you find yourself unable to resist the temptation to play with yourself while visualizing this story, we would be honored. It’s the middle of the week. A Tuesday. For some couples, lovemaking has been delegated to the weekend or whenever the kids are not around or when they’re not too busy with work. Not us.


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This was not really scheduled. I and my lover just woke up with a sexual need so strong that we just knew we would be giving in to our deepest carnal needs later on that night (why not?). So this is what happened. The whole day, while my lover was at work, I was quivering in anticipation of his return. I felt like I was on a sexual cloud. When he arrived home… First, we prepared our bedroom and bathed each other tenderly. As a titillating prelude of things to come, my lover catered to my every desire. With candles, incense, and soft erotic music, we settled into our Tantric Sacred Space together. After bowing low before one another and softly honoring each other with sweet words and hungry looks, my lover and I cleansed the energy in our space with fragrance and bells. Looking deeply into each other's eyes and then sharing an endless full-body hug, we gradually decided how we want to proceed. We helped each other relax into our sacred sex place. A little Tantric breathing together and a little Tantric caressing where it's most needed engaged our senses fully. It seemed that we basked forever in a sensual introduction by touching each other's whole bodies. Then, with unspoken agreement, we seamlessly moved toward my ultrasensitive yoni (vulva and vagina). Yes, he wanted to fully adore (worship was the word he used) my yoni by orally pleasuring it. As he approached me down there so slowly, so sweetly, I couldn’t help myself and so I reached out and tried to draw him in. But he lingered, savoring my yoni to my utter delight, extending my pleasure out as if we had nothing else to do and no where else to go.


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As the waves of ecstasy built, my soul soared! As I lay there engulfed with a myriad of orgasms, sometimes moaning softly, sometimes loudly, I occasionally ejaculated into his mouth. He crooned with delight at this. Eventually, he let me know by his stiff hardness that he wanted to enter me. He asked if I will honor his vajra (penis) by letting him visit my sacred yoni. I was definitely ready and voiced a throaty "yes, now!" to him. With his first slow stroke I flew so much higher while waves of ecstatic sexual energy moved through me. We shared and circled the sexual energy between us and it increased. He stroked slowly and, on the out stroke, I squeezed his vajra with my sexual muscles. He moaned and threw his head back. He stopped moving and we both shook as the orgasmic energy burst out our respective physical seams. He began stroking again… As he worshipped my body with each stroke, I moaned as his member stimulated my G-spot and I began to squirt my sacred ejaculate juices again. We did this over and over again, stopping, starting, moaning, cumming until we were both very much in an altered state. It was so amazing. This is nothing like the old in-and-out we knew earlier in our lives. Now, our ‘still’ (unmoving) sexual moments are as ecstatic – sometimes, even more so -- than the ‘action’ (pumping and grinding) moments. I just wanted these feelings to go on forever! We stayed in the O-Zone, the continuous orgasm zone, for hours. The next thing I knew, I looked at our bedroom windows and light was already starting to peak through the dark night. I fell asleep completely, physically, mentally, spiritually and sexually satiated.

Do You Dare to Enter the O-Zone? Now, let me ask you…


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•

•

•

•


Are you interested in some of that sexual ecstasy ? Do you want to improve your sex life and give it more meaning ? Do you want to relive the hot, exciting days of the start of your relationship ? Do you want to make every sexual encounter fresh, new, and exciting? Do you want lovemaking that blows your mind and soul?

If your answer is a resounding "YES!", you've come to the right place. Whether you're a woman or a man, young or old, single or partnered, gay or straight, you want more. You want more pleasure and amazing sexual ecstasy. You want to be all you can sexually be. You want to feel totally confident as a lover, as the receiver of peak pleasures and the giver of untold ecstasy. You want sex to be total in body, mind and soul to reach supreme bliss. You want to learn how to plug in to the unlimited source of divine sexual energy at your core. You want to be able to connect at all levels with yourself and the divine forces. You want full-body cosmic orgasms that blow your mind. You want to feel deeply connected to your partner and your being-ness. In short, you want to know all there is to know about the ancient secrets of sacred sexuality and spiritual sex known as Tantra. It's wonderful that you want it all. Why? Because you deserve it! And this ecourse, Tantric Sextasy , will help you get more than you've ever dreamed of… out of sex, out of your relationships, and yes, even out of life.

Let’s Start from the Beginning… Where and How Did You Learn About Sex? Did you learn, at a tender age, that your body was divine and your sexual ecstasy your birthright? Of course not.


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Were you given free rein to explore your sexual urges and curiosities? Of course not. Were you trained to maximize your sexual potential in giving and experiencing awesome peaks of pleasure? Of course not. Sadly, our culture represses our very nature. Religions and parents, as agents of those religions, forbid this kind of exploration. And for those lucky enough to have parents who talked to us about sex, well, in truth, they too didn't know how to overcome their own fear and ignorance. Virtually none of our elders talked to us adequately about the beauty, the emotions, the ecstatic moments of sexual pleasure. In today's world, you can't even think or speak about anything sexual at work without the threat of a lawsuit. As a result of the pressures of the right wing and the fears of those in control of the curriculum, sex education in schools has been severely limited and has been reduced to nothing more than a cold, clinical examination of the biology of reproduction. Well, that’s before. This is now. And right here, right now, you've got the friend you've always needed to hear you, understand you, and teach you the wonderful world of extremely pleasurable sex. Even more damaging, health professionals, including Md.'s, are as hung up as the rest of the population. In fact, we regularly receive referrals from highly trained therapists who are too shy or too ignorant to deal with sexual issues. Far too many medical doctors scoff at sexual realities like the G-Spot and female ejaculation. They're stuck in their own neuroses and lack of adequate information. Please don't ask your family doctor for sexual advice. Seek out trained professionals and use the internet. Be discerning. Get multiple opinions. And use our help. Hopefully, you're reading of Tantric Sextasy is the beginning of a wonderful dialogue between you, your lover and your bodies.


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The following statistics make it even more apparent why we need more sex education and more Tantric Sextasy in our lives. •

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•

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Less than half of all women reach orgasm during sexual intercourse. Some estimate that 75% of women can't reach an orgasm without direct clitoral stimulation. Sadly, 10 to 15% of women have never had an orgasm. Many women and a few men use age as a reason not to deal with sex ever again because the sex they've had is simply not worth the effort.

We live in an anti-ecstatic society that's designed to produce obedient workers, not creative spontaneous lovers. If we all had more sexual ecstasy in our lives, we just might refuse to work 70 hour weeks and be on a plane and away from our families most of the week. If we were tantric, we might just want to stay at home more, make love more, and commune with the universe more.

The American Businessman and the Mexican Fisherman Our favorite story that demonstrates how culture shapes our sexual attitudes is about the American businessman and the Mexican fisherman. An American businessman was at a pier in a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small

boat

were

several

large

yellowfin

tuna.

The

American

complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied "Only a little while, Señor." The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish? The Mexican said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs.


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The American then asked, but what do you do with the rest of your time? The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, make love, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life, Señor." The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and, with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. "With the proceeds from the bigger boat, you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman, you could sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. "You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise." The Mexican fisherman asked, "But Señor, how long will this all take?" To which the American replied, "15 to 20 years." "But what then, Señor?" The American laughed and said that's the best part. When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions. "Millions, Señor? Then what?"


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The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, make love, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos."

The Tantric Sextasy Doctrine – Sexual Pleasure is a Priority Get the point? Our upbringing and social pressures make us too busy to smell the roses. We're too busy furiously trying to get to where we could be right now if we just learned to enjoy this moment. Our modern way of life, replete with large doses of sexual repression, partly explains why the average lover doesn't know more about their own orgasmic pathways and therefore demand their right to feel ecstatic. It also explains why so many, both women and men, haven't got a clue on how to be a great lover. When you practice Spiritual Sex with Tantric Sextasy , pleasure becomes your priority and the hue of the world around you changes. In the coming pages, you're going to change the way you feel about sex and the way you engage in sex. Although Tantric Sextasy is a lot about doing sex well, it's also about loving everything that you are. With our help, your sex life will be changed, forever. And if you accept the challenge, so will the rest of your life, too.

Do You Really Want More Out of Life? Don't misunderstand. We're not trying to say that there's anything wrong with any of your conscious choices. Work hard if you enjoy it. Discover and create wonderful things. Pursue whatever priorities work for you. We just want to offer


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ecstatic options to those who are looking for a change. Our aim isn't for you to throw away all that's good in your life now, but just to shift the balance in a direction where life gives you more of the good stuff. That's why you're here, right? Because you want more pleasure out of life? Tantric Sextasy can help. If you do know something about Tantra, we're confident that you'll discover a whole new practical side of Tantra in these pages. Before you're finished mastering our unique approach to sacred Spiritual Sex, your sex life will change dramatically. If you don't know much about Tantra yet, just prepare yourself for a wild ecstatic ride. We promise you, Tantric Sextasy will live up to your ‘wild’ expectations.

Start a Sexploration Journal Now! To bring about the changes that you want, you must begin with observing yourself. As such, it’s important to start your very own Sexploration Journal. To raise your self-awareness, many seekers find great benefit in recording your thoughts, reactions, and discoveries in a personal journal dedicated to sexual exploration. We suggest you go out and buy a beautiful leather-bound journal as soon as you can. Hey! A cheap spiral ring-binder might work, but will you give it the same attention? You decide. While working and playing your way through this e-course, jot down what you agree with, what things impact you strongly, and what items do not agree with your experience. We call this your Sexual Exploration Journal, or Sexploration Journal for short. Journaling can help you process, integrate and communicate.


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As you do the practices throughout this e-course, you're bound to learn a lot about your body, your sex, yourself and your partner. Journaling the path of your learning adventures may offer invaluable insight as you move along. To stimulate your journaling, you'll find discussion questions like the ones that follow throughout our e-course. We encourage you to put the e-course down after you've read a question and look into yourself and your own situation. Then, we strongly recommend you write in your Sexploration Journal what you discovered.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: What’s Your Sexuality Background? Here are some questions to answer in your Sexploration Journal, reflect on, or talk about. •

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What do you like most and least about sex? What kind of values and beliefs did your family hold about spirituality and about sex?

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What role do you believe sexuality plays in a healthy life?

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What kinds of sexual repression have you personally experienced?

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How do you want to change the balance of priorities in your life?

Tantric Sextasy 101 Here are just a few of the key questions that we'll help you answer in the coming pages. •

Do you honor yourself as a sexual being?

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Do you know how to please your lover, anywhere, every time?

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•

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Can you release your inhibitions and open to your Goddess-/God-like nature? Do you enter every sexual encounter with open senses, a relaxed mind, and a spontaneous childlike spirit? Can you orgasm without ejaculating? Does your partner experience female ejaculation?


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Do you know how to merge your heart and your body with that of your lover?

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Do you know what you want in every moment and how to ask for it?

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Do you feel deeply connected to the universe every time you make love?

We're guessing that you're reading Tantric Sextasy because because you want to know all the answers to these sexual questions… and a lot more. When we began our own own Tantric paths, paths, we were pretty pretty ordinary, horny horny lovers. Before finding the ‘light’, Gabrielle was just like any other sexually frustrated woman, often feeling that sex was only something that pleasured her lover, not her. Jeffre was suffering from the same conundrum. Her orgasms required effort and she didn't ejaculate. Somraj, like most men, hadn’t learned yet to separate his orgasm from ejaculation. As such, usually came more quickly than when he or his partner desired. The good news is that our situation strongly motivated us to learn about pleasure, ecstasy, and orgasm through Tantric practice. We've changed so much and had so much fun in the process that we were moved to share our path. That's what this e-course is all about. We're hoping you can learn from our efforts and enhance your sexual selves selves to be all you can be. be. As you'll read over and over, sex just keeps getting better for us. It's fresh, new, passionate, taking us deeper in every moment. We believe it's going to be exactly that way for you too, real soon. Maybe then you'll pass it on and together we'll change the sexual world.

Achieving the Summit of Sexual Sextasy First and foremost this e-course is about how you can create supreme bliss, which is the zenith of sexual ecstasy that transforms orgasmic energy into expanded consciousness.


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Tantric Sextasy weaves the essence of the ancient Tantric teachings with modern psychology and sexology bringing you the best of the old world and the new. It's a modern system of personal transformation based on the ancient Eastern spiritual path that uses sexual energy practices to... •

deepen love and intimacy,

•

extend lovemaking,

•

create continuous full-body mind-altering Tantric Orgasms, and

•

turn lovemaking into sexual meditation.

By opening your senses to the present moment, focusing on pleasure as a divine gift, and embracing all of life and all of your being, Tantric Sextasy ... ... •

heals your mind, body, and spirit,

•

connects you passionately with your deeper self and your lover, and

•

immerses you deeply into the untold joys of Spiritual Sex to reach cosmic peaks of pleasure, ultimately making life an ecstatic journey.

Tantric Sextasy can can help you release limiting beliefs and create the kind of sex life you hunger for deep inside. Not only will you learn how Tantric Sextasy can can enhance every aspect of your love life, but along the way, you'll undoubtedly discover how to make your whole life better and more joyful.

You are Now a Student of Spiritual Sex Tantric Sextasy is a complete guide for the student of Spiritual Sex. In the coming chapters, you will find powerful exercises and techniques to know and master your own sexual forces. You'll learn how to use these methods to give your lover exquisite pleasure only imagined in your most erotic dreams. And best of all, you'll learn all this while enjoying the entire process yourself more than you've ever imagined. This e-course is organized around the Tantric Sextasy Ritual Sextasy Ritual,, our framework for Tantric practice. To define Tantric Sextasy Ritual Sextasy Ritual or TSR for for you: TSR is a template of heart-centered Tantric practices that outlines the six stages Tantric


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lovers go through to create a Tantric Sacred Space and generate ecstatic states with Spiritual Sex . In Tantric Sextasy , a ritual isn't an elaborate, strict ceremony that restricts your personality and spontaneity. It's simply a way to create the kind of mood, environment, connection, and consciousness that activates your higher sexual and spiritual powers. Don't worry; it's so flexible that you'll love it. We created the Tantric Sextasy Ritual Ritual to give you an easy-to-remember format that can help you generate untold peaks of pleasure. After some essential information about Tantra, your e-course contains a detailed chapter about each stage of the ritual that teaches the basic practices of Tantric Sextasy . Plus, each chapter introduces you to several different hot and sexy exercises you may want to use at different times. So, without further ado, here are the six stages of the Tantric Sextasy Ritual. Ritual. •

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•

•

•

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Tantric Sacred Space: Space: Consciously preparing and arranging the environment for your ritual to maximize comfort, safety, and sensuality. (Chapter 4) 4) Connecting Hearts: Hearts : Creating a deep bridge at the heart and soul level by honoring yourself and your lover as reflections of the divine. (Chapter (Chapter 5 ) Meditating Together: Together: Relaxing the mind and body into the moment to prepare for open energy channels with maximum sensitivity and flow. (Chapter 6) 6) Energizing Turn-On: Turn-On: Consciously using the instinctual process of orgasms to turn on your body's energy using the Four Cornerstones of Supreme Bliss. Bliss. (Chapter (Chapter 7 ) Tantric Lovemaking: Lovemaking: Using a wide range of ecstatic sexual practices to exchange potent energies so you can float in the Orgasm Zone together. Zone together. (Chapter 8) 8) Closing Ritual Space: Space: Gently cooling down together to create a mutual sense of energetic completion. (Chapter (Chapter 9) 9)

After going deeply into the attitude and practices of Tantric Sextasy , the chapters of this e-course focus on the multiple methods you can use at each stage of the Tantric Sextasy Ritual.


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Is the Tantric Sextasy Ritual for You? The Tantric Sextasy e-course is for both singles and couples. If you're in a relationship, the exercises and discussions we recommend will be great fun and deeply stimulating. But don't be deterred if you're currently unattached. Much of Tantric Sextasy is based on what each partner can do individually. The beginning of the path is identical for both singles and couples. And as such, it's excellent preparation for the time when you focus on attracting partners, meeting people, and creating the kind of relationship you've always dreamed of. Think of it this way: if you are currently unattached, can you imagine just how your potential lover will feel the minute she realizes how ‘capable’ you are sexually? So whether you’re with someone right now or not, all of you will learn how to creatively use the Tantric Sextasy Ritual so that lovemaking becomes a whole new evolving form of intimate and divine connection. This is Spiritual Sex and Tantric Lovemaking, making love reverently, sacredly, and consciously to maximize and circulate orgasmic energy. The ultimate aim of these practices in Tantric Sextasy is to provide fuel for enhancing consciousness and transforming spiritually. Although each step of the Tantric Sextasy Ritual is chock-full of practical, frank, and action-oriented information and practices, how you use what we teach you is really up to you. You see, we have two primary goals for you. We want you to... •

expand your capacity for sexual pleasure through Tantric practice, and

•

create a foundation to create your own style, your own sacred ritual.

Nothing in each stage of the ritual is mandatory, everything is up to you. Once you learn how to steer your own pleasure and respond to your lover's desires, you'll get to choose what to do when. © 2008 Gabrielle Moore, Somraj Pokras & Jeffrey TallTrees, Ph.D

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Of course, the first few times you go through the Tantric Sextasy Ritual may be like painting by the numbers, just filling in the blanks. But soon, you'll be the creative artist of your own lovemaking canvas. We can't wait to hear about the ecstasy of your own unique artistic creations after you finish this e-course!

The Best Way to Learn the Secrets of Tantric Sextasy Not only does our e-course include a thorough description of the Tantric Attitude, but it's richly enhanced with communication exercises to focus your awareness and stimulate valuable discussion. There are many hands-on sex exercises (sexercises) too to quickly teach you powerful sexual skills. Along the way, you'll undoubtedly discover how healing with Tantric orgasmic energy can help you drop non-productive sexual attitudes, release unwanted inhibitions, and awaken dormant sexual feelings and sensations. Isn't it great that fun and easily learned sexercises can fill you with so much pleasure and promote expanded consciousness? Learning about sex isn't so different from strengthening your body with workouts at the gym. They both follow the old maxim: use it or lose it. The more you exercise, the easier it gets and the better you feel. It's a lot like learning a brand new sport. There's a learning curve. More practice gets you through that curve faster. Through practice, you heal your weaker parts to make your sexual system healthy and whole. We've created an e-course that is user friendly. Though it has a little of everything we've learned and how we learned it, it's not an academic volume. Nor is it an exhaustive listing of references, or lengthy survey responses. It's a practical program that reveals all you need to know to begin to create your own Tantric sex lifestyle.

Mind-Blowing Sex is Not Normal


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You know what? Great sex is not natural. Being a great lover is a learned art and science. Do you know anyone who was born a great lover? If you grew up the way most of us did, you weren't born into a society aware of the knowledge of sacred sex. It takes time and some effort to learn how to be an ecstatic lover. The path to your divine pleasure is great and wide and it awaits you. We've made it as simple and as straightforward as possible. Please don't expect complete transformation instantly. Each of us changes at our own rate, depending on multiple factors. Sometimes in baby steps, sometimes in quantum leaps. That's why the practices we spell out for you here are so important to do and do more than once. And that's why we urge you to get and use a Sexploration Journal. Writing down what happens can help you pick up where you left off next time. Further, exploring sexuality often pushes emotional buttons and raises issues buried deep inside. You'll probably want to take a break to process those when they come up. Also, your Sexploration Journal can make it easier for you to talk with your partner. If you're anything like the average person, talking about sex isn't easy. If you're going through this program with a partner, these questions provide great stimulants for honest, intimate communication and tremendous personal growth. We all suffer from selective memory about emotionally charged issues and sex is one of those issues. If it's written down, you can't "forget" about it. If you can't answer some questions, or nothing comes up, we suggest you take time to


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consider the question over a few days. We know… digging deep is not necessarily what we do in our everyday lives. This, too, takes practice.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Tantric Sextasy Here are some questions to write about in your Sexploration Journal, reflect on, and talk about with your partner. •

How much of your sexual potential have you actually realized?

•

What sexual realms do you fantasize of reaching?

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What about Tantric Sextasy attracts you? What about it interests you?

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By how much do you think the Tantric Sextasy Ritual could enhance your sex life?

•

If you're single, how do feel what you’ll learn here can help you?

•

If you're in a relationship, how do you want it to change?

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How will you make time to do the practices in this e-course?

If you can't come up with an answer to any of these and future questions, please dig deeper. The more you know about yourself, the more likely your sex life will expand and be terrific all your life.

The Origins of Tantra Tantra – Become the Lover You Were Born to Be Tantra is the ancient Eastern practice of Spiritual Sex and sacred sexuality. The word Tantra comes from the Sanskrit roots "to expand, extend, and weave". Tantrikas (Tantric adepts) extend their awareness, heighten their sensitivity, expand their consciousness, and weave all the energies of life together to affirm living a joyous sensual life. Tantra is the art of transforming the life force awakened by orgasmic energy into spiritual connection. It utilizes the pleasure we create by merging male and female energies using the resulting life force for transformation. It's a unique


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attitude towards sex, love, intimacy, your connection to the divine, and all of life itself. Tantra shows us how to love all of who we are and open fully to our sexual and spiritual nature. As we practice more ways to experience ourselves as sexual beings, we can experience more ecstasy and pleasure. As part of your Tantric exploration into the depths of your sexuality, it's only natural that you explore your feelings, your sensations, and the power of your life force. Tantra says love all that you are, experience everything, enjoy. We'll fully explore the nature of Tantric Sextasy so you'll learn how to be the blissful, playful, energetic lover you were born to be; a lover who has the desire and capacity to make lovemaking last through multiple orgasms of multiple kinds, regardless of your sex. We'll teach you how to relax, awaken your senses, and use your breath to increase your sexual pleasure. We'll demonstrate how to move your body to enhance your orgasms. We offer you everything you need to know, to practice, and to experience as you fly emotionally and spiritually on the wings of sexual ecstasy. Ultimately on this unique journey, sex becomes meditation. And that's why this e-course is called Tantric Sextasy .

Tantra Text – The Oldest Sex Manual Tantra’s roots are very old. Thousands of years old. The first Tantra teachings emerged in India as a grass-roots rebellion against the repressive hierarchical religions of the day. Tantra sprang up as a movement to make spiritual illumination and ascension available to all, not just to the privileged castes. The earliest Tantras are writings in ancient books thousands of years old that describe secret sexual rituals, disciplines, and meditations. These esoteric Hindu


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texts were written in the form of a dialogue between the God Shiva and his consort, Shakti. According to myth, Shiva and Shakti, the archetypal male and female, created the universe by making love. The union of their energies was needed to create the whole. Quite a contrast to the tale of Adam and Eve, right? No original sin, no punishment, no right and wrong, no expulsion from Eden. Simply create by making love. (Remember the names Shiva and Shakti as you'll be seeing lots more of these borrowed deities soon.) The essence of modern Tantric Sextasy remains the same as in the early days. Tantra opened the doors of spiritual evolution to everyone, regardless of their social status. This was in direct opposition to the dogma of the day that declared one must suffer for many lives to do penance and cleanse thoroughly. The caveat was that you could only reach for enlightenment if you were of the upper class because it was believed the upper classes were more evolved and closer to God.

Tantric Sex and the Kama Sutra You've undoubtedly heard of the Kama Sutra, the Hindu love manual that's now about 1500 years old. Most have, thanks to the courageous translation of Sir Richard Burton during the 19th century. He was a much earlier nobleman with the same name as the well-known modern English actor. Secret Tantric writings began some 7000 years ago and dealt with all energies - body, mind, emotion, spirit -- as a path to liberation and enlightenment. In contrast, the Kama Sutra is merely a depiction of sexual customs of upper-class India during the early centuries of the common era. So what is this modern fascination in the West with this once obscure sex manual? Maybe it's because of the forthrightness of the author, Mallinaga Vatsyayana, about things we're too ashamed or embarrassed to talk about today. Things like


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dozens of ways to suck, scratch, and bite, not to mention many exotic lovemaking positions. Though we don't know much about him, we do know that he was a sage and religious scholar who lived in Pataliputra, India between Benares and Calcutta sometime between 200 and 500 AD. He didn't pull any punches too. The Kama Sutra was meticulous and graphic about seduction, foreplay, sex, and love relationships, which made it the definitive guide to sexual etiquette of the times.

Kama Sutra’s Sixty-Four Arts The Kama Sutra is popularly known today as the definitive sex guide but really it was more a How-To manual of the times. To quote Nik Douglas and Penny Slinger in their book Sexual Secrets: The Alchemy of Ecstasy...

"The Kama Sutra, the classical Indian treatise on the Art of Love, enumerates the Sixty-Four Arts. The text advises that these should be studied along with the Kama Sutra, preferably under the guidance of a teacher. These arts and sciences (for no distinction between them was then made) include singing, music, dancing, writing, drawing, painting, sewing, reading, recitation, poetry, sculpture, gymnastics, games, flower arranging, cooking, decoration, perfumery, gardening, mimicry, mental exercises, languages, etiquette, carpentry, magic, chemistry, mineralogy, gambling, architecture, logic, charm-making, religious rites, household management, disguise, physical sports, and martial arts plus many specialized activities related to the culture and time."


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So do you see now that the Kama Sutra is really way of life?

Sex Speak Spreads (How Tantra Crossed the Globe) From India, Tantra spread to Tibet, joining with Buddhism, on to China, Nepal, Japan and Southeast Asia. During the 11th & 12th centuries, Tantrism peaked in India. The Moslem invasion in India in the 13th century caused the slaughter of Tantrikas and the destruction of their manuscripts. As a result, the Tantra movement was forced to go underground as the culture became more conservative. Many cultures have shown evidence of Tantra-like wisdom including the practices of the Taoists in China and Japan and the teachings of ChulaquaiQuodoshka of Native American lineage. The principle of merging sex and spirit with the intentional use of life force energy has been a long-standing and widespread belief of many indigenous cultures. Indigenous peoples around the world don't separate the mind, the body, and the spirit as we tend to do in the modern West. They understand and practice the principle of unity. Not only can we not separate ourselves into parts and still be left with meaning, it no longer makes sense to separate ourselves from one another. The principle, central in Tantric Sextasy , that we are all One has been around for a very long time. Curiously, modern science and investigation into ancient manuscripts are substantiating the principle that we're all connected at the energetic level. Tantra mostly remained secret and hidden until the Indian mystic and spiritual teacher, Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, brought Tantric teachings to the light of the public eye in the late 1960s and early 1970s. More than anyone else in modern times, Osho, as we now call Bhagwan, is responsible for popularizing Tantra in the West. For so long, the earth-shaking


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truths of the old scriptures were inaccessible due to their cryptic codes and obscure language. Osho translated not just the words but the spirit of living tantrically.

Don't Worry; You're Not Joining a Religion! We understand that all this talk about spiritual things raises concerns with many people. If you're worried about what you're getting yourself into -- don't. Tantric Sextasy isn't a religion based on faith, dogma, or right living. If you compare contemporary examples, Tantric Sextasy isn't an organized religion in any sense. You don't have to maintain a prayer schedule, follow a list of commandments, or purify yourself according to some strict set of standards. Tantric Sextasy isn't a philosophy. It has no rules, qualifications, or requirements. Certifications are meaningless. There's no code of behavior, no punishment for sin, and no pot of gold waiting for you in the afterlife at the end of the rainbow. Tantric Sextasy says that heaven, nirvana, or the height of joy, are here… NOW. You simply have to show up, completely. If you're seeking inner peace, A higher consciousness, a more fulfilling sex life with a new partner, or rekindling the earlier fire with a longtime mate, the sacred erotic wisdom of ancient Tantra can help. Yet, rituals are a part of Tantric Sextasy . Why?

Tantric Sextasy Rituals – Sex Routines to Elevate your Sex Skills In India, traditional Tantrikas spent many years under the guidance of a spiritual teacher engaged in elaborate yogic and meditative rituals to purify their bodies and master their minds. These practices were intended to awaken the powerful psychic energies through which the adept could enter into higher states of consciousness.


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Students had to master a wide ranging portfolio of arts and sciences ( The SixtyFour Arts) before engaging in secret ceremonies. Only when a disciple was deemed ready did he or she partake in sexual rites with a partner or the teacher. This was a lifelong pursuit, not some quickie weekend workshop. Still, we don't approach teaching Tantric Sextasy in such a rigorous or disciplined way. We retain some ritual as a way of honoring one another as reflections of the divine. We prepare our space, bathe and dress sensuously, look deeply into each other's eyes, and communicate from the heart first. These simple ritualistic steps remind us to look through the outer shell and see into our own and our lover’s inner beings. We revere Spiritual Sex as sacred because we treat it as a gift from above. Our sentiments about Tantric Lovemaking resemble how we might enter a holy temple on the path to the liberation of our body, mind, and spirit.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Your Thoughts on Sexuality & Spirituality Write in your journal and/or speak to your partner and muse about the following. •

What knowledge and preconceptions about Tantra do you have?

•

What are your current sexual and spiritual practices?

•

What role do you believe spirituality plays in a healthy life?

•

What interests you and concerns you about Spiritual Sex?

•

What do you believe about the connection between sex and spirit?

The Magic of Saraha The following is a very old parable, probably from the original Tantras, the old manuscripts in verse that describe the nature of us all and outline the principles of Tantra.


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In the very old days in India there was a young man named Saraha who was very bright and curious. Being a nobleman, he spent a lot of time at court with the king and queen and their family. As he matured, he became known for the depth of his knowledge and his advice was highly sought. The king relied on this young man a great deal. But he was unfulfilled. He felt there was more but wasn't sure what he needed to do to find out this "more". One day he announced to the king that he was going on a long journey to study the ancient teachings in greater depth. He traveled far and wide to great cities with large libraries. He studied and studied, acquiring great knowledge. After a long while, he returned to his home and was eagerly greeted by the king and queen. They were very happy to see him because they thought of him as a son they weren't sure would return from his long journey. There was a big party to celebrate his homecoming. Saraha continued in his role of advisor while he continued to study. He was aware that he often felt empty with a deep knowing that something was missing. He was also beginning to question if more knowledge was going to give him the answer. One day Saraha decided to go to the market. Now, Saraha was a nobleman and noblemen didn't do that sort of thing, going to the market bustling with commoners, that is. That was the work of servants. Yet, he had a very strong impulse and followed it. As Saraha was walking through the stalls, avoiding the mud and the animals, he saw in the distance, a magnificent young woman making an arrow with absolute focus. She was so present, so total, that, in that moment, Saraha became enlightened. His life was forever changed.


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He and the Arrowsmith Woman ascended into love and moved together into the crematorium. What we would now call the cemetery. They moved there because it was big enough to have great gatherings and because it was an irreverent kind of thing to do. Saraha no longer desired the status of being at court and an advisor to the king. His values had turned around and he discovered with his lover the power of pleasure and joy. Meanwhile back at the court, the king was hearing rumors of these huge parties at the crematorium and felt concern. He sent an assistant to go and find out the truth about what was going on. The assistant left, never to return. So the king directed his chief advisor to check things out. But he never came back either. With nowhere else to turn, the kind asked his wife, the queen, to go and find out what was going on. She agreed to visit Saraha and didn't return. Finally in desperation, the king himself went to the crematorium and stepped into the magic of song and sensuality that the gathering represented. And he too, did not return. The power of Saraha and the Arrowsmith Woman was pervasive. We hope you enjoyed this story. Whether or not you embrace the outrageous idea of celebrating in a graveyard, maybe remembering Saraha's transformation will help as you walk through your marketplace in life.

Do You Have a Tantric Attitude? Tantric Sextasy is first and foremost an attitude. Afterwards, it's emotion, awareness, and communication all put together. We use sexuality to generate lots of energy to accelerate spiritual evolution. Due to this focus, Spiritual Sex is a unique approach to lovemaking. But it's so much more than technique. Spiritual Sex is making love reverently, sacredly, and consciously to maximize the flow of orgasmic energy within you and between you and your lover.


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To be sure, this e-course will teach you lots of specific sexual How-Tos that will give you greater confidence. Just remember, when you combine these techniques with the Tantric Attitude, you will be a complete dream lover, woman or man. What is the Tantric Attitude? The long answer is what Chapter 2 is all about. In brief though, the Tantric Attitude is saying "Yes" to all your life desires, putting pleasure first, maximizing consciousness, and honoring the divine in yourself and your lover. Tantric Sextasy includes expansive and exciting solo and partner exercises so you may understand first-hand (pun intended), the nature of the Tantric Attitude and the experience of Spiritual Sex. Before you're done, you'll know exactly how to create a Tantric Sacred Space and immerse yourself into a Tantric ritual, sinking into your body while losing your mind (in pleasure). You'll soon know how to interweave body, mind, and spirit to create powerful, ecstatic and long lasting sexual experiences, with or without sexual union (Tantric for intercourse). Through consciousness you'll learn to generate your inner fire, couple your sexual energy with physical stimulation and exchange orgasmic life force energy with your lover in an ever broadening circle of ecstatic Spiritual Sex.

Turn Your Inner ‘Subtle Energy’ to ‘Orgasmic Energy’ Before going further, we should explain what we mean when we refer to a key target of Spiritual Sex, orgasmic or sexual energy. When you're sexually turned on, you can feel a small trickle of nervous stimulation and physical excitation, alive, bubbling, vibrating inside you. We all have the capacity to feel it and generate it. This is sexual energy, which most lovers feel most strongly right before and right after orgasm. That's why we usually call it orgasmic energy.


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The old Sanskrit name for this normally latent psychosexual power is kundalini . The kundalini is written about and pictured as a coiled snake, lying dormant at the base of the spine. When awakened through Tantric practice, kundalini energy can ascend through your subtle energy or light body, creating powerful ecstatic experiences and heightened cosmic consciousness. Although the kundalini is always there, sometimes it's quiet. When sleeping, its sensations are subtle. So you'll see this kind of energy referred to as subtle energy. It's like a higher, finer frequency that's hard to hear until you're tuned in and turned on. When awakened, kundalini becomes a potent force inside you. Then this subtle energy becomes a tidal wave of life force. When you know how to awaken your kundalini and exchange orgasmic energy with a partner, there's no limit to your ecstasy.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Your Capacity for Orgasmic Pleasure Here are some questions to answer in your Sexploration Journal, reflect on, or talk about. •

•

How relaxed are you during sex? What kinds of things go through your mind during sex?

•

Can you imagine how sex and spirit are related?

•

How big is your capacity for pleasure? Do you ever hold back?

•

What are your orgasms like? Big? Little? Wet? Dry? Difficult? Full-body? Multiple? Continuous? Wavelike?


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Chapter 2: Tantric Sex Attitude - How You Think in Your Head, Affects What You Do in Bed… Since you made it to Chapter 2, we're sure you want to be engulfed hour after hour by ecstatic orgasmic vibrations. We're certain you want to float on a cloud of prolonged pleasure. You've got to be deeply interested in finding out how to totally transform your mood, emotions, and life into non-ending delight. In other words, you're ready to get the real story on ways to achieve Tantric Sextasy . How could anyone who doesn't live in a cave disagree with any of this? Now we're ready to begin sharing with you the practical and simple ways to learn the secrets of Tantric Sex/Spiritual Sex so you too can experience all levels of sexual delight. As we've mentioned, it's so much more than just learning to put extension A into slot B and then going to sleep.

The Right Tantric Attitude is YES-BE! What is the Tantric Attitude? We use the acronym YES-BE to remind us that a Tantric life is one that is purely positive. The letters stand for the following. •

Y

Y es reminds you to allow and accept instead of resisting.

•

E

Experience now, by watching yourself to raise consciousness.

•

S

love your Self, accepting that your divine nature is good.

•

•

B be in your Body, not your mind, open your senses, feelings, and heart. E Enjoy pleasure, joy, and sexual energy to remember your basic nature.


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As you move through the following pages, you'll gain a deeper understanding of how practicing the Tantric Attitude of YES-BE will empower your sex life and help transform your life in general.

Tantric Sextasy is an Inner Game In the modern West, we emphasize the power of knowledge and thought. What you know profoundly affects what you do and what you get. Life is based on hard work and accumulating material wealth, a partner, family, friends, and success. You reap physical pleasures, moments of happiness, and a high quality of living. In the traditional East, the quality of inner life -- not the outer rewards of living - was, and in more traditional societies continues to be, more important than what you accumulate. The spiritual life values and seeks... •

•

•

Inner peace, free from raging mind chatter some call the monkey-mind , Inner stillness, free from the emotional ravages caused by the pursuit of success and the fear of failure, and Inner harmony, free from relationship ups and downs by loving yourself as a divine being.

Inner peace is not passivity or quietness; it's opening to the playful nature of the universe, experiencing the passion of living a joyful life. You experience supreme bliss by noticing the pleasure in every breath, every tree, every flower, every moment. You are joy itself.

Tantric Sextasy – More Than Just Living a Deliriously Sex Happy Life Tantric Sextasy is primarily a way of life leading to deeper meaning in your existence. It guides you to harness the raw power of love and sex to fuel higher consciousness and promote transformation. If enlightenment is something you're seeking, welcome to the fast track.


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Tantric Sextasy is the bridge between the East and West. The path to profound happiness through full awareness and full acceptance of the physical world. By learning to make love consciously, fully, and spiritually, you transcend the outer school of hard knocks. In Tantric Sextasy , Spiritual Sex is a path, not an end. It's the journey home to the ecstatic being you really are. The Tantric Attitude invites and adores all aspects of life, whether frowned upon by society or not. Tantrikas (adepts in Tantra and Spiritual Sex) exult in living each moment fully, and practice creating and experiencing pleasure as the highest priority. In Tantric Sextasy , pleasure is the center, not the periphery of life. Pleasure determines your life priorities, not money, social position, where you live, and what car you drive.

Sex is NOT Bad… It’s Darn Good! The Tantric Attitude is all about accepting – no, rejoicing – the fact that SEX IS GOOD. And the sooner you realize that sex is good for you, the sooner you accept the fact that excelling in this field is something that benefits you. You see, sophisticated lovemaking skills are revered as an alchemical science and creative art form. These skills are learned, not innate. Ecstatic lovemaking is not "natural", it's something you have to consciously embrace and master. Instead of viewing sex as dirty, sinful, or base, the original Tantras (ancient texts) viewed the energy you generate and feel during sex as a powerful creative, divine, healing force. Many of us have repressed sexual urges, feelings, and thoughts that hold us back from profoundly believing we are completely divine. We often feel we've been kicked out of the Garden of Eden. In a very true sense, sexual repression has closed the door to the garden of ecstasy.


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Through Tantric practice, our sexuality becomes a powerful internal force. When you open to all that you are with love, fears and repressions fall away and there is only you, the divine blissful being who has always been there. This is what Tantric Sextasy refers to as sexual healing. Without drugs, Tantrikas deliberately induce altered states of ecstasy to create a mystical experience of transcendental oneness with the universe. We figure, why not enjoy ourselves while we're healing and evolving?

Abandon Yourself to the Pleasure, Let Go, Surrender… Tantric Sextasy welcomes everything in life, whether socially, morally, or scientifically blessed or not. It accepts everything and forbids nothing. When you embrace the Tantric Attitude, you, too, will find yourself continually saying YES! to life. You won't find judgments here about right and wrong or good and bad. We recognize that moral judgments are based on artificial yardsticks held fast in our subconscious minds. Tantric Sextasy's outlook is one of wholeness, embracing everything, including opposites, as simply different aspects of the same thing. To cast off this programming, these tired, unwanted beliefs, we learn to live in harmony with whatever life serves up, whether on a silver platter or a bed of thorns. We learn to accept constant change and roll with the pleasures as well as the punches.

Do Not Resist, Submit! Tantrikas major in surrender -- just let things happen of their own accord without resistance! Surrender is a powerful spiritual practice in Tantric Sextasy . Now, this doesn't mean giving up because you've lost the fight. Rather, surrender means withdrawing from meaningless struggle and conflict.


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We define surrender this way: relaxing, giving up the need to control, and releasing resistance by letting go, welcoming whatever is flowing through you, and giving yourself completely to an experience. To put this in sexual terms: relax your mind; don’t think of work or the kids or chores. Focus on one thing only: your carnal pleasure. Where are her hands now? Focus on the exact place on your body that she’s touching. Where are her lips? Think of nothing else but her warm mouth on your manhood. You’ll find out that by simply letting go and focusing on the here and now – without any guilt whatsoever – dramatically enhances the pleasure you feel. When we surrender in Tantric Sextasy , we give up the illusion that we can control the outside world. Instead, we focus our life force on getting into harmony with our inner world. When we don't resist the thorns, we have more energy and greater ability to change our inner life and thereby watch our outer world evolve.

"Y" is for Yesss! The closest we have to a slogan representing a philosophy in Tantric Sextasy is all summed up in this word: "Yes", which is why it's the first part of YES-BE. Tantrikas

don't

fight,

resist,

or

reject

anything. Suppression of impulses, feelings, and thoughts that others deem unacceptable only produces mental warfare and internal stress.

Tantric

Sextasy and

modern

psychology say if we suppress natural inner forces, they won't disappear. They'll simply grow, fester, and manifest in our lives in unconscious and often counterproductive ways. So our work is to release all internal tension as a useless struggle with no winners, only ourselves as the loser. We let go of the futile attempt to stop things


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that are already happening from happening. Why fret about something that's already occurred? Why worry about something that might happen? Instead, we turn our attention to what is giving us joy in the moment and then we expand on that. When Tantric Sextasy says "Yes" to whatever is going on, it is not hedonistic, denial, nor amoral. Because all Tantric actions are surrounded by consciousness, the "Yes" comes with awareness of what we want, what reality is, and what our resistance is. We say "Yes" so that we don't deny our natural life force or create more internal repression. The "Yes" allows us to fully and completely experience whatever happens in each new moment. Then we can move through any impulse, desire, and feeling rapidly and thoroughly without attachment. If we are conscious of our inner selves, we simply don't attach an outcome or ego investment to anything. We know that in every moment we have choice and that every choice has consequences. We choose with conscious intention.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Inner Acceptance This is a good time to write in your journal, talk to a friend, and discuss the following with your partner. •

•

•

Do you typically accept things or does something inside you instinctively resists them? How peaceful, joyful, and harmonious is your inner life? What are your beliefs about a divine source and your relationship to that divine source?

•

What parts of sexual play do you dislike or disapprove of?

•

What are your beliefs about the spiritual nature of sex?

"E" is for Experiencing the Now with Full Awareness The Tantric Attitude is deeply rooted in the process of consciousness. That's why the second letter of YES-BE stands for "Experience the Now." This includes © 2008 Gabrielle Moore, Somraj Pokras & Jeffrey TallTrees, Ph.D

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being more present, opening your senses, watching yourself, noticing your reactions, and raising your awareness of what's happening inside and out. In Tantric Sextasy , we describe higher consciousness as awareness, in each moment, of your connection to everything, including that which many call God force, Goddess energy, or Spirit which give you the ability to... •

•

•

See and feel the big picture while focusing on the smallest detail, Let go of personal psychological baggage and see the true divine nature of yourself and others, and Feel the love of the universe coursing through your being while you notice the bliss you're experiencing.

When you are conscious, you never damage another or take advantage of them. Hurting another is exactly the same as hurting yourself. When you're conscious, you feel emotions and intentions in your body as well as your heart.

The Heart and Soul of Tantric Sextasy Tantric Sextasy is all about raising consciousness of the present moment. So many people are swept through life living roles dictated by pictures in their minds instead of living with full awareness of the now. They spend their time and energy dwelling on the past and plotting the future. They're so busy comparing the current state of affairs to a set of pre-recorded internal tapes that reflect their internalized standards of parents, leaders, and society, or at least their interpretation of those standards. To counteract the programming that keeps us distracted, Tantric Sextasy teaches us to focus our attention on the present; on what our senses are receiving right now. Are you aware of what's going on right this second? How about now? Now? Tantric Sextasy shows us how to exist in this moment, becoming totally absorbed in the now while fully opening our inner windows to the outside world.


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This activates our right brains so that we can feel our feelings and become deeply rooted in our truth of the moment. Being here now is the secret to staying connected to our inner sense of divine bliss. We do this by heightening our perceptions with our five senses -- sight, smell, taste, touch, and hearing. We become dedicated to fully enjoying the physical by reveling in laughing, eating, drinking, massaging, dancing, and making love. Remember, pleasure is a Tantrika's top priority.

Meditation – Empty Your Mind & Fill Your Body with Pleasure If Tantric Sextasy isn't a philosophy but a collection of spiritual and sexual practices, how does it raise our consciousness? Isn't that something you do while praying or meditating? We're showing you how to transform your being with orgasmic energy, to make lovemaking a sexual meditation. You're discovering that, for sex to be sacred, transformative, and awesome, you must approach it with the appropriate attitude, the Tantric Attitude. A critical part of this attitude is being calm, still, and empty inside. Practicing this state of quiet is what meditation is all about. Meditation is simply emptying the mind. Meditating regularly isn't a prerequisite for Spiritual Sex, but it sure helps when you enter Tantric Lovemaking with a state of inner peace and mental stillness. We'll start to introduce you to the meditation process here so that you can experiment with it if you want. There are lots more about it later in Chapter 6 (Day 3). Since you can't force thoughts away, emptying the mind is more challenging than it sounds. Gurus have developed many meditation techniques down through the


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ages that help quiet the mind. We've tried many and they all seek to create a deep inner peace filled with stillness. Meditation is entering a no-mind condition, which is a mind empty of chattering thoughts; a meditative state of deep inner peace filled with stillness. Tantric Sextasy does not aim to convert you into some kind of modern yogi or spiritual guru. But to be completely honest, meditation is one of the most powerful ways to relax, center yourself, and open fully. In our busy lives, it's a valuable tool to combat stress. Later you'll find out how vital this is for generating vast amounts of ecstatic sexual energy. We're including this optional exercise so you can see how effective it can be.

SOLO SEXERCISE: Tantric Breathing Basics Description The simple method we offer here just guides you to pay attention to your breath. It's good preparation for what's coming, because conscious breathing is one of the Tantric skills used in the sexual exercises that follow. If you've never meditated before, please be patient with yourself. The first time may yield very little discernible results. As with most consciousness-raising practices, it takes time and repetition. Purpose To develop relaxation, inner comfort, and stillness by simply watching your breath. 1. Silence… Make some free time in a quiet uninterrupted space. Some like to do this next to a partner, but since it's a personal private inner experience, that's not essential. Yes, you have to turn off your phone, answering machine, pager, and TV. Please don't answer the door either. 2. Sit down. © 2008 Gabrielle Moore, Somraj Pokras & Jeffrey TallTrees, Ph.D

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Sit in a comfortable position. The classic posture is the lotus position with one leg crossed over the other. We can't get all the way there, and it may not be easy for you either. It's fine if you get as close to this posture as you can, insuring at least that you sit upright. A great aid is a "zafu," a round Japanese meditation pillow that's rather firm and shaped like a fat pancake. Settling on a pillow is more comfortable because it keeps your pelvis higher than your semi-crossed legs. You can also meditate sitting straight in a comfortable chair or sofa. Gurus agree that the one most important component of your position for meditation is that you keep your spine straight. 3. Just BE! Meditation is not doing anything -- it's simply being. So don't set any goals or preconceptions of what's going to happen. Just sit for a moment and relax. 4. Witness. As you settle into a comfortable state, you'll undoubtedly discover that your mind is busy. Don't do anything about it, just let it happen. Witness and watch ideas, thoughts, and pictures floating by like clouds in a brisk wind. 5. Breathe! To quiet the mind without force, watch your breath coming in and out. Notice the sensation of air entering your nostrils, filling your lungs, and streaming out. Don't consciously try to change or control your breathing, just pay attention to it. 6. Learn to come back. You'll probably find your concentration wandering away from your breath. When this happens, don't beat yourself up. It's natural. When you realize you've strayed, just come back to watching your breath. You may have to do this repeatedly. 7. Give yourself the gift of time. Gurus advise at least 15 minutes of sitting meditation morning and afternoon. Since you shouldn't be watching the clock, we're not sure how you time it. You can set an alarm clock, if you like, as long as it has a pleasant chime instead of a buzzer. We usually just remain still until we relax and the mind settles.


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Sexercise Afterthoughts You're probably most interested in knowing how meditation can help prepare you for ecstatic Spiritual Sex and Tantric Orgasm. Because ecstasy is "relaxation in high states of arousal", tension of any kind impedes the energetic process and the relaxation vital for long-lasting experiences of supreme bliss. Meditation also helps you practice focusing, an important skill in Tantric Lovemaking. As well, if you incorporate regular meditation into your life, you'll find that it's a great way to relieve stress, release tension, and relax.

"S" is for Self – It’s All About You, You, You! As we've said in different ways already, Tantric Sextasy is an individual path. Fortunately, you'll enjoy much passion, energetic coupling, and sexual fulfillment along the way. But it begins with you and ends with you. To be blunt, the spiritual part of Spiritual Sex requires a spirit. Namely, you. You can't transform your sex life, your love life, or even find a partner until you're willing to show up, to be present, to be yourself. We use the third letter of YES-BE for loving your "self" but it could just as easily mean "soul" or "spirit". There's an old adage that's very true in Tantric Sextasy and essential to the Tantric Attitude ... "You must love yourself in order to love another." How is it possible to love another without loving yourself? We don't believe it is. If you don't love yourself, what do you have to offer another? If you can't accept and allow your own wisdom and beauty to show, you won't let yourself be who you really are. How desirable is an incomplete or empty person?

Repeat After Me… I’m Better than ‘Good Enough’! In our practice, we often ask our clients how they feel about themselves. Although the specifics vary, there's often a powerful self-critical voice which says "I don't really like myself very well". Ironically, people can more easily describe what they don't like about themselves than what they do like.


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Loving yourself is an underlying foundation of Tantric Sextasy . To show up, you simply have to love yourself unconditionally. Well, maybe it's not so simple, but it is clear and uncomplicated. The Tantric path and the joy found in Spiritual Sex all begin with this simple yet challenging requirement. So as part of your immersion in the Tantric Attitude, you have to ask yourself the following. •

•

•

•

Do I think I'm good enough, worthy enough, deserving enough? If I accept that I'm a drop of water in the ocean of God/Goddess, i.e. the universe, can I give up any sense of self-loathing? Aren't I a reflection of you, just as you are a reflection of God, just as you are a reflection of me? Doesn't the love of God/Goddess begin with the love of self?

Answering these questions is a perfect opportunity to practice the Tantric Attitude of shouting an enthusiastic, heart-felt "YES!"

The Secret to Improving Your ‘Lovability’ Factor The divine energy of love flows throughout the universe. It's accessible to all of us. Tantric Sextasy believes that love is what it's all about. We are all connected and are extensions of that life force energy. If everything is created by that universal source, how can anything, or anyone, be unlovable? To be lovable, accept everything about yourself, cherish all parts of yourself, love yourself. When you encounter something about yourself that you don't like, focus on changing it instead of dwelling on what's wrong. If you don't learn to love yourself, not only will you limit the love you can give, but you'll keep attracting people who mirror that lack of love, that unavailability.


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DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: I Love Me Here are some important questions for you. Jump in, think, meditate, answer in your Sexploration Journal, and share with your lover if you wish. •

•

•

•

•

How do you feel about yourself? Do you like and love who you are? Do you often feel "one down" or "one up" when you're with other people or do you feel like their equal? What do you believe about the nature of humans? Are they innocent, good, bad, divine, evil, etc.? Do you believe that you have to prove your worthiness, your lovability? For what or whom do you have prove yourself? Do you believe you have to "do" something in order to be loved?

Write Your Own ‘Self Story’ Because you are the child of God/Goddess, you are perfect. You are totally perfect. That's fundamental to embracing the Tantric Attitude. There are no conditions on your divinity, your worthiness. Your hair is divine, your nose, your figure, your intelligence, your sex. The only way you'd think otherwise is if you've bought into somebody else's view about how you should look or be or act. Don't buy other's stories. Just accept yourself. Let go of your old beliefs about the need for success to prove your worthiness and your need to be right. To reach the lofty places of ecstasy and love, release your fear of not being good enough. Those are beliefs which are empty and meaningless in the face of Tantric love and pleasure. Sure, not everything has gone the way you'd have scripted it. Undoubtedly, there are things about yourself you want to change. What's perfect is that you are here now realizing those things. Your consciousness is choosing something different which you wouldn't be doing without your past experience and your current conditions.


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Celebrate where you're at right now, who you are right now. What's perfect is that you arrived in this moment with the desire and awareness to change. YOU, the divine presence. This is the unchanging truth of your life. Celebrate that!

The Capacity for Tantric Sex Has Been Inside You All Along Tantric Sextasy believes that your essential make-up is love and that your true nature is blissful. You are basically good. Inside you is a spontaneous, joyous, playful, childlike spirit who wants to be free to savor everything and love everyone. This is fundamental to the loving yourself part of YES-BE. Why don't most of us behave that way if that's our basic nature? Modern Western upbringing doesn't teach us these basic values of self-love and enjoyment of life. Instead, we're made unnatural by social conditioning and by moral codes that don't serve our inner make-up. All these do's and don'ts produce inner struggles against our basic desires. What can you do about your upbringing? Tantric Sextasy believes you should... •

•

•

•

•

•

Be conscious of who you are and what you want. Recognize which desires spring from your inner being and which have been impressed on you from the outside. Don't resist healthy impulses that would enliven your vital spirit from emerging if you indulged them. Shed the social conventions that bring you down and release the brainwashing that doesn't serve you. If you follow an impulse that's not part of your essential nature, learn from your experiment and drop it in the future. If you find great satisfaction in what you pursue, conclude that you've discovered more of your personal truth.

Are you getting the message that Tantric Sextasy is about knowing yourself?


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The Tantric Attitude includes complete honesty and authenticity about your own truth. When you learn to observe yourself objectively and accept the wisdom of your heart, you shine bright light on your inner knowing. Why? Because it's essential for spiritual growth. This kind of spiritual evolution can only lead you to a clearer idea of your deeper self, who you really are. Then you might wonder... •

•

What will I find underneath all those layers of old baggage hiding my real inner self? Will I like who I finally see?

•

If I get to know myself better, will the truth really set me free?

When you practice meditation and witnessing yourself, you discover many things about yourself. Some you feel proud of, and some not. But they're all part of you. Loving yourself means accepting everything you find inside and out. Of course, what you learn from introspection is initially more difficult to deal with than watching the outside world go by. When we see something we don't like about ourselves, we're faced with a momentous crossroads. Do we put our heads in the sand, deny what we see, and blame others? Or do we take the more courageous fork of accepting ourselves fully, and thus others, and growing from there?

Nothing is More Important than the Fact that You Feel Good The wonderful distractions of modern life provide ample opportunities to choose the ostrich head-in-the-sand path. Delightful ones, to be sure. TV, music, food, drugs, travel -- you name it. The Tantric Attitude certainly encourages you to enjoy everything fully and deeply… but with consciousness. The big question is do you choose distracting yourself with fun, or learning and evolving with both pleasure and pain?


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Tantrikas choose the later, accepting all parts of themselves, what some might call "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly". Of course, we don't see it that way because the natural consequence of acceptance is self-love. If we're created in the image of God/Goddess then we must be perfect in those divine eyes. Our version of the old spaghetti western would be "The Good, The Better, and The Beautiful." Believing that we're completely all right produces some amazing shifts, such as the following. •

•

•

We behave with greater openness around others and have greater willingness to receive pleasure. We drop our self-judgments about unworthiness and begin to feel deserving of all the gifts life has to offer. We adopt the bedrock belief that nothing is more important than that we feel good.

We're not preaching selfishness here. We prefer to call this part of the Tantric Attitude, self-full . Find out who you are underneath, become a full self, be fully who you really are. Explore yourself, discover yourself, re-invent yourself, experiment with yourself, enjoy yourself.

How to Be ‘Self-Full’ Since many of us are programmed with a strong injunction against selfishness, this Tantric guideline is hard for many to swallow. We're raised believing that thinking only of ourselves is a big sin. So we don't think of our own mental health and physical well-being nearly enough. We feel guilty when we look after ourselves or do things that bring us "too much joy”. This can make us stressed, moody, grumpy, and resentful. Tantric Sextasy doesn't encourage us to exclude other's feelings, needs, and happiness. It just teaches us that in order to help others, give emotional support,


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and be there for them we've got to look after our own selves first. Then there's more of the real you to share. In other words... •

•

•

Wouldn't it be better to be happy so you're more able to cheer up everyone around you? Wouldn't you rather have a bright, shiny, and independent best friend who loves you passionately instead of a depressed lover who clings to you? Wouldn't you prefer a secure partner who bubbles over with zest for life and drags you forward instead of pushing you backwards?

You can have the best of both worlds: be complete in yourself and glean great pleasure in serving others. That was the Buddha's formula for enlightenment.

Really, What Brings You Pleasure? Giving to others, achieving your goals of material success, raising your kids -- all these common aims and aspirations of life are wonderful as long as you're having fun and feeling satisfied along the way. Too many of us are so trapped by the things we believe we ought to strive for that don't really float our corks in each moment. A basic step in the Tantric path is to really witness why you do what you do and what brings you pleasure and joy. And then crowd out the unfulfilling busy work of your life by focusing on the good stuff. When you're self-full, you fully love yourself, you naturally exude appreciation and compassion for everyone you meet. If you carry on with embracing the Tantric Attitude to a place of fullness and completion, you'll end up with lots more to give. We hope you never again confuse self-full with selfish.

SOLO SEXERCISE: Tantric Self Loving Description


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Just practicing the exercises in this e-course will help you accept and love yourself. The Tantric tools and techniques of meditation and personal exploration promote this kind of self-discovery and self-love. But here's an exercise that uses the power of your mind to enhance your self-image closer to the truth of your divine nature. Purpose To practice loving yourself by looking for and reinforcing your desirable qualities. 1. List down your good qualities. Make a list of the qualities and characteristics you like and love about yourself. These can be sexual or not. For example, write "I am a very active person." Or "I can have great orgasms." 2. Review. Review this list daily and, each time, give yourself a pat on the back. 3. Reverse psychologize. If you find you keep thinking of the qualities you don't like about yourself, add the reverse of those negative qualities to your list. For example, if you think you're sometimes too selfish, write "I am a generous and giving person." If you discover that you often feel that you don't like your neck, write "My neck is lovely." If this is too much of a leap, try softening it with something like "I'm learning to appreciate my neck more every day." 4. Review. Review this revised list at least 15 times a day. 5. Declare how good you are. Say the qualities on your list out loud. Put intention behind your statements. Say them slowly and strongly like they're completely true, the way a lover who totally adores you would say them. Sexercise Afterthoughts By sticking with this exercise daily and adding to your list, you'll be learning to use your mind and spirit to change the way you feel. The power of your true


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thoughts is the most powerful spiritual force in the universe. Remember who you are, you wonderful one.

"B" is for Your Body, Your Blissful, Sexy Body Have you ever looked into a full length mirror at your naked body? Go ahead, take your clothes off and do it right now. •

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•

What thoughts go through your head when you look at yourself? What do you see? How do you feel? Are you filled with awe at the beauty and power of your physical manifestation? Or do you feel disgust?

Undoubtedly, there are parts of your body that you love and find attractive. And there probably are other parts you really wish were different. We want to support you in feeling the maximum pleasure that you can experience in this world. To achieve what Tantric Sextasy is all about -- growing, loving, and living life to its fullest -- we hope you've clearly gotten the message that you need to feel good about all parts of yourself. The key to joyous living is anchored in loving yourself, which requires that you totally accept who you are mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and, yes, physically. This begins with an exceedingly difficult assignment, accepting your body the way it is right now. Here's another great example of Tantric Sextasy's novel approach to life. The media and mass consciousness, having created the vision of the perfect form, encourages us to fill ourselves full of negative judgments about our anatomy, particularly if you're a woman. Tantrikas choose not to fall for these false standards, instead cherishing our bodies as the temples of our souls. So you don't look like the sexiest model or hunkiest movie star. Guess what? It's too bad for them that they aren't more like you. You can look at the situation of body acceptance either way. Which point of view is more true for you?


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Your Body, Your Sex Temple In contrast to religions that view the pleasures of the flesh as degrading or evil, Tantric Sextasy recognizes that our physical vehicles are a divine gift. These physical shells house our spirit and let our inner beings experience the sights, sounds, and smells of the physical world. Regardless of their size, shape, or color, our bodies deserve our unconditional love and affection just for letting us delight in all these delicious sensations. Further, they help us think, communicate, move, and act. Your body is the physical expression of who you are in this world. It creates your first impression, your calling card, not to mention an extension of your inner spiritual self. To a Tantrika, we view the body as a divine gift, so we call it what it really is, your temple; the sanctuary where your soul resides. Don't you think life would be much duller if you were a disembodied spirit? Face it; sex would be a lot less fun without a body. So Tantrikas honor their bodies. That includes looking after them, feeding them properly, and exercising them. We believe one path to Goddess/God is by loving our physical gifts and cherishing all we can experience. This is the reason pleasure is such a central driving force in Tantric practice. And why a Tantric massage like you'll discover later in Tantric Sextasy is such wonderful way to give yourself the appreciation you so richly deserve. We often start new clients out with a sumptuous experience like this so they may appreciate the physical pleasure stored within.

Body TLC Makes for Better Sexual Ecstasy Your body is the vehicle for moving into exalted states of spiritual and sexual ecstasy, being swept away in orgasmic waves of bliss, and experiencing the ultimate communion with yourself and your lover.


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Do you understand the importance of how you feel towards your body impacts your sexual pleasure? It's not about what others think. Loving and honoring your physical temple begins with your body self-image and how fit you stay. Not what others think is fit, but what your body tells you it needs to function well. This is where self-love begins and ends for so many of us. Here's a practical example. If you're going on a long awaited pilgrimage in your car, don't you think some maintenance, TLC (tender loving care), and appreciation should go into the vehicle that's supposed to take you where you want to go? Well, Tantrically speaking, that vehicle is your body, folks. Your care for your holy vehicle is demonstrated every day in what you eat, how you exercise, and how you treat your body. Bathing, washing, personal hygiene -these are spiritual rituals. If you truly love yourself, which is a high state of spiritual health, then you'll treat your body with care, give it the necessary loving attention that it deserves, and not abuse it. Of course, Tantric Sextasy says "Yes" with consciousness to anything that turns you on. We'd be the last to denounce indulgences that bring you great joy. But when drinking, smoking, and drugs are a steady diet, we wonder about the consciousness part. Overdoing anything can have a negative affect on your health and your body's ability to perform when and where it counts.

Do You Have What it Takes to be a World-Class Lover? Face it, friend, if you desire to be a world class lover, you must have the body fitness and the energy to sustain frequent long lovemaking sessions. There is a gender difference in the West regarding loving your body: 85% of women in the USA say they are dissatisfied with their body in some way while only 15% of men feel this way. Neither of these figures necessarily reflects a healthy attitude nor a healthy behavior pattern.


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Over 50% of the populace is out-of-shape, unfit, and overweight. Unfortunately, this figure is growing higher all the time. We don't want to imply that you have to be a thin marathon-runner to be fit and that you have to look like a movie star to be sexy. In Tantric Sextasy , we don't subscribe to the exaggerated media-driven images of what's right, healthy, and desirable for a body. Attractive bodies can assume many different shapes, sizes, and proportions, as long as they're loved and cared for. As we learn to joyously own our bodies and open their hidden channels to the flow of sexual energy, we discover we can create powerful desire for any body shape. However for most, being unfit represents a lack of love for the body and in turn, promotes a form of self-loathing. Self-loathing almost always leads to dysfunctional behavior and diminished sexual desire. The way you treat your body and how you feel about your body manifest in your sexual expression.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Body Acceptance This is a good time to write in your Sexploration Journal, talk to a friend, and discuss the following with your partner. •

How do you feel about your body?

•

When you look at yourself in a full-length mirror, what's your reaction?

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What does your body tell you about how fit you are?

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What changes could your body benefit most from now?

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When and how do you plan to institute these changes?

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How well do you treat your body? What changes do you want to make in how you care for your body?

Worship Your Body From a Tantric point of view, your temple, your altar, your body deserves reverence and an attitude of worship. Your body gives you the foremost pleasure when it is fit, healthy, and loved. The payoff for caring for your body is clear.


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A scenario we have seen over and over again is the married woman who's overweight, feels depressed, and has lost interest in sex. She complains she can't get into sex because she feels unattractive. She decides to divorce, immediately starts working out, becomes fit, and voila!, her sex drive returns full on. Suddenly a juicy relationship becomes a priority again. We're not saying that her original relationship wasn't part of the problem. But we agree that feeling unattractive, male or female, will diminish your interest in sex. Similarly, you may be turned off if your partner gains weight or lets the body go to pot. How you look and how you feel are reflections of deeper issues. Loving your body as well as your spirit is the foundation for hot sex, a solid relationship, and a joyful life. Do what ever it takes to love yourself.

SOLO SEXERCISE: Honor Your Body and Hot Sex Will Follow Description Ironically, you may have difficulty getting fit and enjoying sex if you don't love yourself. How can you change that? Saying "I love you" to yourself and your body, and really meaning it, is a great start. How often do you need to profess your feelings? Ask any women and she'll tell you she needs to be told at least daily that you love her. Your body needs the same continuous reassurance. Here's a simple exercise you can do every day that will help. Purpose To regularly affirm your love for your body by telling each part that you love it. 1. Go nude. Each morning, take all your clothes off to admire yourself. © 2008 Gabrielle Moore, Somraj Pokras & Jeffrey TallTrees, Ph.D

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2. Look and admire your body. Stand nude in front of that full-length mirror and look at yourself slowly and fully. 3. Love every inch of your body. One at a time, tell each part of your body that you love it. For example, start at your feet and say "I love you, feet. Thank you for supporting and transporting me each day." Cover every part of your body with "I love you, legs," "You're a cute butt, I love you." "What great hair!" Be creative with your love, admiration, and honoring. 4. Mean It! Don't rush. Don't be mechanical. Don't look away. Be present, focused, and mean what you say. 5. Feel It! When you're done honoring every inch of yourself, just take a few moments to feel how it feels to love this important physical part of yourself. 6. Call Your Lover… If you're willing, you can take this practice a step further with your partner. Do this exercise in front of your lover instead of a mirror. 7. Caress It! When you're done, lay down and let your lover gently touch, caress, and admire each part of your body, adding statements to reinforce what they love about your body. Of course, there are lots of other fun healthy methods to prove to your body that you love it. Dancing is a sensual way to get great exercise. Take a dance class. It's a blast. Go dancing to bands that really move you. Your body will love it and your partner will too. Tantric Sextasy also recommends daily Yoga. It's a great way to stay limber, to stay fit, and to reinforce the sexual muscles which open the body to the flow of


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supreme bliss in Spiritual Sex. And it's another clear message that you're actively loving your body. Living in the mountains, we revel in hiking the forests in summer and skiing the hills in winter. What kinds of physical activities turn you on? But don't do these things because somebody else thinks you should. Don't do them because we told you to. Only do those things for your body that make you feel good. If you're unfit, it will be more difficult for you to feel the muscles necessary to generate orgasmic energy. Fatty tissue has very few nerve endings, therefore very little feeling. You want to be able to feel that subtle energy running in your body. Your body will benefit from feeling tuned, just like your car runs better when it's tuned.

Responsible Sex is Better, Hotter Sex While we're on the subject of honoring your divine temple, treating it right, and only putting healthy things in it, let's throw the risk of sexually transmitted diseases into the fray. There are a lot of germs you can exchange during sex, some which you won't notice, some you will, and others that can kill you. Many -- chlamydia, syphilis, gonorrhea -- can be treated easily with medication if you discover them soon enough. Others, like genital herpes and HIV, have no cure. Of course, a cold sore now and then is way better than losing your entire immune system, the ultimate consequence of AIDS that is caused by the HIV virus. When you adopt the Tantric Attitude of loving yourself and your body, making love responsibly is the obvious consequence. Our Appendix (Day 5) contains a thorough and detailed description of STDs and how to protect against them. We put it there so that long-term monogamous couples wouldn't be distracted this early in Tantric Sextasy .


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If you're dating, however, be sure to read it carefully. Learn how to check out your sex partners carefully, and use protection carefully. We even give you specific suggestions about carrying a little safer, smarter sex supply kit with you, that we call your valise d' amour.

Love Your Body/Sex Temple Basics Here are some things you can start doing right away to start loving your sex temple. •

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•

•

Begin with loving yourself. Use affirmations, prayer, psychotherapy, or whatever you need to increase your ability to love your body. Honor your body with healthy food, a fitness regimen, and daily appreciation. Consider increasing your sexual energy through Tantric self-pleasuring or being with your partner sexually more frequently. Sexual energy heals. Practice the ancient secrets of sacred Spiritual Sex and incorporate these exercises into your daily life. Spiritual health requires a healthy diet of sexual ecstasy.

"B" also Means Being in Your Body In our rush, rush, rush world of today, we spend a huge amount of time in our heads, thinking, thinking, and thinking some more. We think about who we are. We think about what's happened recently and long ago. We think about what we don't have and what we want. We think about what we're going to do next, what's expected of us, what we're going to say. We even dwell on what our car needs, what our kids need, what our yard needs, etc. By the time we try to relax, our mind is buzzing with so many thoughts that we can't. It's like a pack of monkeys all chattering away, which is why some call it your monkey-mind. As a result, relaxation comes with difficulty. Maybe that's why TV has become a major sedative for very busy minds. We'd like to offer an alternative mode of relaxing that's basic to Tantric practice. We call it "being in your body". Of course, at some level you're always "in" your


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body while you’re alive and breathing. But here we're really referring to what you're conscious of: the non-stop thoughts going through your head or what's going on lower down? Being in your body means feeling everything that's going on physically. It means focusing on your sensations in the moment. It means opening your senses and tuning into the messages you're receiving from inside and around your body. Being in your body begins, of course, with loving it. But once you've started your lifelong program of self-adoration, then you need to shift your attention from your mind to your physical senses. This requires being relaxed and not thinking too much. For example, you're in your head when you're worrying about what you're going to eat or wear tomorrow. You're totally in your body when you orgasm and feel the intense sensations sweeping through you, which is a good enough reason why Tantric Sextasy promotes greater sensory awareness. Being in your body means sensing the subtle energy flow of awakening orgasmic energy and allowing it to take you to the heights of Tantric Orgasm.

Tantric Orgasms - To Truly FEEL it, Get It Out of Your Head The mind can't get you to ecstasy. Your mind can actually keep you from feeling pleasure by distracting you and draining every last drop of free energy. Of course, we know it's easy for us to say "Stop thinking and start feeling." But another thing entirely for most people to actually learn to embrace this more sensitive art of being. Yet, a quick, easy, and surefire way to quiet the mind is to open your senses and feel your body. That, my friend, is Tantric Sextasy in a nutshell. If you practice focusing on your sensations without thought or judgment, your senses open even wider and your attention leaves the non-stop chatter of the


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mind far behind. As you sink deeper and deeper into the sensations of the body, you can begin to smell and taste the real smorgasbord unfolding. As you begin to experience the freedom by dropping the continuous churning and control of the monkey-mind, you find being your ecstatic self comes more easily.

Use Your Mind to Find the Path to Sexual Ecstasy Don't get us wrong, your mind can be a powerful and sometimes magical tool when you use it effectively. But when it's running the show 24/7, gobbling up your bandwidth, and jabbering away non-stop, then it saps your life force. Sure, your mind can be a powerful tool. But when the servant is ruling the mansion of your life, it's too often counterproductive and even painful. Take charge, dear friend. Use your mind to find your path to ecstasy. Then let it go while you enjoy. Get out of your head when it serves you. Your ecstasy isn't there; it's in your body.

SOLO SEXERCISE: Get Our of Your Mind, and Pleasure Will Follow Description The Sitting Meditation Practice earlier in this chapter can help you quiet your mind so you'll have more consciousness to direct into your body. The active meditations we offer in the Meditating Together Chapter can further assist you dramatically in getting in your body and staying there. Here's an even simpler way that you can use often once you get the hang of it. Purpose To get in your body, out of your mind, and present in the now in order to drop the incessant thinking and mind chatter that distracts you from relaxing and feeling. 1. Cleanse your body. Put your full attention on your body. Flood it with consciousness. Imagine your breath cleansing your body from the inside.


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2. Your feet, your sexy feet. Focus on what your feet are feeling for 15 seconds. 3. Love from head to toe. Then, one at a time, focus on your ankles, calves, knees, thighs, pelvis, stomach, lower back, upper back, chest, shoulders, arms, hands, neck, face, and head. 4. Waves of sensation. Then imagine waves of sensation slowly washing up and down your whole body. 5. The starts of orgasmic energy. Do you feel any subtle tingling anywhere? When you do, imagine your breath streaming in and fueling it. The more you inhabit your body through breath and consciousness, the more you'll feel the first stirrings of kundalini energy: warmth, tingling, a vibration of aliveness. 6. Relax. Just relax, feel your body, and watch what happens. Sexercise Afterthoughts If you really followed the directions, you probably noticed that you weren't worrying, obsessing, or really thinking about anything. You probably also found that your mood shifted in the process of the practice. The door is opening to another way of being.

Opening Your Senses We keep saying that Tantric Sextasy is all about getting out of your head and staying in your body as a prerequisite to feeling expanded ecstasy and reaching supreme bliss. Pleasure is now and in your body so you need to be more conscious of your physical sensations. You couldn't have missed our various references that the path of Tantric Sextasy requires heightening your senses. We mean your sense of sight, smell, sound, taste, and touch. When you heighten your experience of these, ecstasy is just around the corner. There probably are others but this is a good place to start. Focus on the messages your senses are


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sending you and you'll sink into your body, out of your mind, and become more sensitive to pleasure. Here are some suggestions that you can use to open your senses during lovemaking. Touch Give sensual massage (see the Energizing Turn-On Chapter). Use fingertips, nails, lips, tongue, hair, breath, and your jewels (Tantric for genitals). Add fur, feathers, flowers, oil, and other objects. Taste Make kissing last forever. Melt chocolate in your mouths. Pass a grape back and forth. Feed your honey finger foods. Eat off your lover's body. Enjoy endless oral sex. Sight Clean and decorate your lovemaking space. Arrange fresh flowers and lush green plants. Put up beautiful paintings and sculpture. Wear sexy clothes. Reveal some cleavage. Change your hairdo. Shave your pubic hair. Dance and strip for your sweetie, bump and grind. Put a sex flick on the DVD in the background. Smell Light incense and scented candles. Keep aromatic flowers close at hand. Use aromatherapy essences and scented massage oil. After you bathe, leave your skin natural to reveal your subtle aroma and pheromones. (Perfumes mask the natural smell of your lover's unique scent.) Sound Use mood music to evoke emotions. Whisper sweet everythings (little words of love) in your lover's ear. Make loud love sounds. Let the rhythms move your body. Talk dirty. Moan and groan when you feel passion.


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Most of us do not use our senses fully. Men are about 80-90% dependent on their visual sense. Maybe that's why porn videos and websites are such big business. If used constructively, there's nothing wrong with all that. But, hey, what about hearing, smelling, tasting, and touching? We all need to practice gleaning pleasure from more of our senses.

Be More Sex Sensitive There are many ways to increase awareness of your body by opening your senses. You can slow down and listen more. You can meditate and tune in to the subtleties your senses awaken. You can dance and feel your body. You can walk in the forest and breathe deeply. You can make love ever so slowly. Tantric Sextasy can and does teach you to focus on your sensations as a meditation. It's a way of further finding out who you really are, a way of expanding your awareness and your pleasure. It's often a challenge for students new to Tantric Sextasy to shift from thinking to feeling. This shift usually requires some intense practice, especially for guys who've been conditioned to live in their heads. For example, when we ask for feeling feedback after a sensual massage, a common mental answer is "It feels good, like she cares about me." Or "It reminds me of the time when I was on vacation." Frankly, we'd rather have heard something sensation-oriented like "My skin is tingling" or "My muscles feel light as a feather" or even "I still have some tightness in my neck." This is the body talking, not the memories in the mind. To help this learning process, we developed the following Sex Sensation Checklist. When you choose to be in your body or you're asked about your feelings, use the items on the checklist as memory joggers to remind you of your physical sensations. You can also turn the items on the list into specific questions.


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The Sex Sensation Checklist Texture •

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smooth velvety

Discomfort •

aching

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gnawing cramping

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silky

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rough

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burning

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sharp

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sizzling

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dull

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pain

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soft

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nausea

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hard

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bumpy

Temperature •

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hot warm

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woozy acid

Pressure •

pulling

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pushing

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cold

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pressing

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cool

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pounding

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lukewarm

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tight

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heat rush

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tense

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shiver

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stress

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sweat

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congested

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chills

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stuck

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seething


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Movement

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tickling

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waves

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tinge

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surges

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flush

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streaming

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rush

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swirling

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twitching

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bubbling

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tinkling

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spiral

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goose bumps

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current

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fluffy

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flowing

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blowing

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stretching

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scratchy

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gurgling

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itchy

Weight

Vibration

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lightness

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vibrating

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dizzy

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quivering

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lightheaded

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tremoring

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heaviness

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quaking

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floating

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shivering

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full

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trembling

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empty

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throbbing

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hollow

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spasming

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tension

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pumping

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stress

•

•

squeeze

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humming

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percolating

beating

PARTNER SEXERCISE: Sensory Delight Description A fun way to get in your body, open your senses, and heighten your sensitivity to sensations is with the Sensory Delight Practice. Simply blindfold your lover


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and titillate them with tastes, smells, touch, and sounds. Then you can remove the blindfold, and offer glorious sights as you slowly and sensuously reveal your naked body. Believe us, this works a lot better than watching TV. You'll want to do the Sensory Delight Practice on special occasions. Each time you do, add extra excitement by varying what you do. Or it can easily stand alone. You may not need nor wish anything more, but it also really gets lovers in the mood for passionate lovemaking. There are two ways to approach this exercise: 1) You can silently surprise your lover, or 2) You can discuss the possibilities and together decide what you want to do to each other. Either way, the one giving needs do some unexpected things to excite each of the five senses. You'll understand better as you read along. By the way, receivers, whether you're forewarned or your honey sneaks up on you, remember to breathe deeply and slowly if you want to keep your senses wide open and your sensations at the max. Purpose First and foremost to have each sense stimulated and titillated so you may fully open all your senses. Preparations Please read the entire practice together before beginning. Giver (the one who is titillating the receiver's senses), begin by collecting the following materials or whatever similar delights you can get your hands on. 1. To Heighten the Sense of Smell. Collect some flowers, essential oils, perfumes, incense sticks, scented candles, fruit slices such as lemon or orange, and anything else that will wake up the sense of smell. Add unusual odors as long as they aren't toxic. Consider back rub ointment, Eucalyptus oil, mild cleaning products, and condiments from the refrigerator. 2. To Heighten the Sense of Taste.


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Prepare a small plate with finger foods like fruit pieces such as orange, apple, banana, pear, and peach. Include jam or jelly, chocolate, something gooey such as peanut butter, nuts, as well as something tart or spicy but not too shocking such as mustard, chutney, or salsa. You might want to add small glass of liqueur. 3. To Heighten the Sense of Hearing. Lay out whatever bells, rattles, drums, and shakers you have. We collect noisemakers like Tibetan bells and musical instruments, but scratching, rubbing, and blowing on most anything works fine, too. Lots of household objects can make interesting sounds, including your voice. 4. To Heighten the Sense of Touch. Use satin or silk scarves, feathers, fur, plastic massage tools, a single Kleenex, rope, scratchy cloth, a riding crop or soft whip (or a hard one if you're into that), and a flower, dead or alive. Don't forget that you can apply your fingertips, fingernails, hair, face, hot breath, breasts, and jewels just about anywhere, the more unexpected the better. An ice cube, ala the movie "9 & 1/2 Weeks" can prove most interesting. 5. To Heighten the Sense of Sight. Clean and arrange the space elegantly. Use lighting to highlight things without making the room too dark to see easily. Drape sarongs or other cloths. Lay out meaningful photographs and power objects. Dress in something soft, sensuous, and sexy. Use costumes to play a role. Layers are good as you'll be dancing and stripping seductively. Yes, you guys, too. Step-By-Step Instructions 1. Check for boundaries. Check-in with your lover about the purpose of the Sensory Delight Practice, to titillate, excite, and open the senses. Not to shock, scare, or push your honey to the edge. Ask them if they have any concerns or want to set any boundaries. Promise to honor whatever they voice. 2. Set the sexual stage.


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Light some candles. Put on some soft, sensual, but playful music in the background. Place a blindfold over your lover's eyes. Guide your receiver to sit in the middle of the room and expose as much skin as your sweetie is comfortable with. We like to spend at least 5 minutes on each of the following sections. Though we've suggested an order below, you can begin with whichever sense seems right for you. Be spontaneous so you make this playful and seductive. Remember, you want this to be a turn-on, not a turn-off. To encourage your partner to be in the body, not the mind, don't talk unless you want to whisper sweet everythings to enhance the "hearing" section. Laughing allowed. 3. Smell. Squeeze fruit slices just before offering them. If you have a fresh scented flower, let the receiver sniff it slowly. Place scents and oils on your arm to warm and intensify them before putting under your lover's nose. Alternate sweet aromas with unexpected ones to catch your partner off guard. Remember your targets: excitement, surprise, titillation as well as stimulation of a particular sense. 4. Taste. Use your fingers, lips, or tongue to place a small amount of food in your lover's mouth. Take your time and let them smell it first before tasting it. Tease their lips with tidbits first where appropriate. Again, vary the types of tastes you offer. Offering a morsel in your mouth during a kiss is great fun, too. This can get hilarious, but also a turn-on. 5. Hearing. Ring a bell over your lover's head and let the ringing echo throughout the body. Be conscious of the intensity of the bell before you ring it. Deafness is not desirable. Shake some rattles; beat a drum in the distance. Be creative with tempo, location, and loudness to add surprise. Whisper sweet words of love, sweet everythings, in your darling's ear. Moan, sigh, and breathe hard in your honey's ears. Let your own body move to the rhythm you're creating to add to your turn-on, too. © 2008 Gabrielle Moore, Somraj Pokras & Jeffrey TallTrees, Ph.D

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6. Touch. Depending on how many clothes your partner has on, touch skin anywhere with each of the objects you've collected. Sneak up on different parts of the body with different textures, pressures, and speeds. Caressing with different naked parts of your own body is always a bit hit. Use your imagination and major in surprise. 7. Sight. After you've gone through the other four senses, take off your lover's blindfold slowly, sensuously, maybe with your teeth. Pose seductively, smile flirtively, dance sensuously, and strip slowly. You might want to select some special dance music for this portion. If you don't believe you can dance, just prance around in your sexy outfit. Even touch yourself and writhe in response. Your darling's eyes will get the message about where they need to go. Whatever turns your honey on is fair game. Guys, your lover will love to watch you move, regardless of your hesitations. Try it. 8. Turn the teasing around. Is it time to turn the tables? When you're both ready, exchange places or make a date to switch roles. Sexercise Afterthoughts The first time lovers experience the Sensory Delight Practice always feels terrific. So do your best to really draw it out. This is great practice for "getting" what it means to open the senses. You can't experience everything in one session, or even several. In subsequent sessions, you may want to just do a portion of the practice or add your own personal twist. Just have fun. Above all, be safe. A little surprise smell, taste, sound or touch adds ever so much to the titillation. But we don't advocate creating intense shock, fear, or pain. Opening the senses, getting into the body, totally focusing on your sensations isn't only a description of meditation, but also of a Tantric encounter. The


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Sensory Delight Practice might well lead to further loving adventures. We're hoping! Our pleasure is your pleasure and your pleasure is our pleasure.

Emotions are Sexual Energy in Motion Actually there's more to life than ideas. Part of loving yourself is noticing, welcoming, heeding, and loving your emotions, too. Emotions are energy in motion, your reactions to the things of life outside and inside. You can't explain them away because emotions are real, not imagined. And they're OK, not good or bad. In fact, emotions can be a helpful tool when you learn to honor and use them, which is an essential foundation of the Tantric Attitude. Yet, our modern world is a mental world. In this world of the mind, we're taught that knowledge is king, logic reigns supreme, and measurable results are all that count. We end up believing that there are some higher standards outside of ourselves which determine right and wrong, some ultimate truths we may never fully know, some mysterious higher power. Some infamous Saint Peter waiting to pass judgment on how we live our life. We often live in fear of our sentence, always on guard, always wary of our inner critic. This chronic tension, our daily diet of information overload and the stress from our internal conflicts certainly produce lots of emotion. But we're not supposed to give much credence to our feelings. Face it, we're not taught how to recognize, learn from, and respond to the surging tides of our emotions. Men especially are conditioned from an early age not to show their emotions. Be a man, suck it up. Don't be a baby, be tough. Ignore your feelings, have a stiff upper lip. Being emotional is supposed to be a sign of weakness. So we feign an outer facade of strength by appearing aloof, unconcerned, and unemotional.


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This applies to modern women, too, especially ones who try to compete in a man's world. If you appear too emotional, you're seen as weak, childish, and thus, not to be taken seriously. Our modern way of life confines us through learnings from parents, society, religions, and powerful leaders. We're encouraged to force the emotions that burble up into logical little boxes, trying to make sense of them and life. But they don't fit. We can't always reason, rationalize, and render emotions understandable with the mind. As a result, we often choke ourselves off from our emotions. When we fear feeling bad, the rigid rules we've internalized about the way we should be kick in and repress our emotions. An emotion is just your life force reacting to the ups and downs of life in your own unique way. Underneath, deep inside, you're unlike anyone else. Your responses and behaviors can't be completely explained using someone else's values. Whatever, this is you. You can't try to stuff, criticize, or change your emotions. They are what they are. They have their own life, your inner life. All you can do is let them be, which, of course, is an essential element of the Tantric Attitude. Emotions are like bubbles, some tiny, some huge. No matter what you do, they keep coming, growing, rising. Some float away. Some take you with them on wings of joy, love, and passion. Some surround you, weigh you down, and continuously push and pull you. When emotions pop up, some disappear quickly, some stay, and some come back again and again. Those are the ones you need to listen to. It's your inner being talking. Strong repeated emotions simply mean that your inner being has a message for you that you're not heeding.


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In that sense, your emotions have great value. They're a peek into your basic nature, a window into your soul, a doorway into finding out who you really are.

Honor Your Emotions Essential to the Tantric Attitude is honoring your emotions. •

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If you honor your emotions, you can learn from them. If you don't, you're subject to strange and mysterious hidden forces. If you recognize them, you can use them constructively. If you don't, they control your life. If you enjoy them, you'll enjoy life more. If you don't, they'll whip you around, jerk you this way and that, prod, punch, and pull you when you least want it. If you can feel your feelings, understand your emotions, and handle them, then you'll be able to live life more fully. If you can't, then you'll be fighting life and life will be fighting you.

Living with emotional guidance provides you faster response to situations, greater clarity, and more harmony with others. It helps you make decisions, solve problems, and know what's right for you, especially when you're not aware at first about what's going on inside. Part of the Tantric Attitude, the final E of YES-BE, is about enjoying. That's what honoring your emotions can help you to do. Emotions are Your Inner Guidance System No matter how well-off or well educated you are, no matter how well you accept their guidance, your emotions play a major part in determining how you navigate life. Ask anyone where they live, why they moved, why they changed jobs and you'll find it was because of love, greed, fear, boredom, a more exciting opportunity, or a boss they hated. Underneath there's a strong emotion. Yes, it's self-evident; your emotions are always there. Face it, you need tools to deal with them, manage them, and handle them because they're an integral part of who you are. Like everyone else, you're living, in part, an emotional life. Wouldn't you rather it was conscious, healthy, and enjoyable?


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So many of us classify emotions as good and bad. In actuality, they're all just energy trying to guide you. You need to learn to how not to judge your emotions but simply accept them. If you can figure out what you're feeling, you'll be in a much better place to guide yourself. You may not be able to understand your emotions with your logical mind, but at least you can seek to understand what your inner being is trying to tell you. You see, your emotions are your spiritual guidance system. They're a messenger from where your life force flows. When what you're thinking, sensing, or doing agrees with your soul, you feel positive emotion like happiness, elation, joy. When your experience bugs you down deep inside, you feel negative emotion like fear, anger, and depression. Your emotions tell you if you're aligned with your true nature, your basic desires, your real self. When you feel really powerful emotions, your inner being is telling you how strong that part of you is. How important that desire is. How true that truth is for you. How dangerous it is to ignore it. What a gift!

YES-BE Helps You Heed Your Guidance System If you ignore the message about something you truly don't want, don't worry, your emotions will get stronger. If you heed the message, things will go better and you'll feel better. In other words, learning to flow with the emotional messages from your guidance system is basic to the Tantric Attitude. Part of your new Tantric mission is to learn how to identify, describe, express, and communicate your emotions. Listening to your emotions may be essential, but that doesn't mean it's easy. The key is contained in YES-BE. Say "Yes" to them, experience them with consciousness, love that part of yourself, and enjoy them. How? By using the "B" part of YES-BE, being in your body. Focusing on bodily sensations is the window to your emotions.


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Use the Sex Sensation Checklist as a meditation, tuning into the messages your body is sending in each new moment of now. By listening to your emotional guidance system, you'll be so much better prepared to enjoy pleasure through Spiritual Sex. Do you see how all the parts of YES-BE are coming together? If you accept things, remain conscious, trust yourself, stay in your body, and open your senses, you'll be operating much more differently than the average unhappy robot. Oops, we mean unconscious person.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Handling Your Emotions Here are some thought-provoking, emotion-producing questions to help you examine your emotional life. •

How quickly do you recognize when you have emotions?

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How well do you honor your emotions?

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What emotions keep appearing over and over? What's the message? What are your strongest emotions? What does that tell you about your true desires? What can you do to better tune in to your emotional guidance system?

PASSION is the Tantric Way of Living There is a complete universe within your being. Tapping into the energy of that internal world and extending it into all aspects of your life is Tantric Sextasy . It's about getting out of your head, into your body, and being more of what your inner wisdom guides you to be. It's about heeding your feelings, honoring your emotions, and being more passionate about everything you choose. With Tantric Sextasy , you can learn a different path, a more alive path, a more passionate path. As you've seen, you need to add valuing your emotions into the equation to heighten sexual passion. But as you've also seen, there's more than just sex to Tantric Sextasy .


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Passion is a way of living. Passion is... Any strong, driving, powerful emotion, or any overpowering feeling, positive or negative, felt with intensity and abandon. This includes emotions such as love, joy, hatred, anger, or boundless enthusiasm. More often passion refers to ardent love, strong sexual desire, or lust.

Following are some of the essential elements of passion. •

promoting fun and excitement,

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choosing novelty,

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challenging yourself,

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exploring new ideas and activities,

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using all your senses,

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risking beyond your comfort zone,

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thinking youthfully,

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being playful and laughing a lot, and desiring more sexual pleasures.

Those are the kinds of emotions we cultivate in Tantric Sextasy , the passionate ones. None of this wishy-washy, luke-warm, take-it-or-leave-it kind of emotions. Go for the gusto in life, live life fully, go for it. If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much room. What's the Tantric path? Learn to live life passionately and your sex life will be transformed. Or is it the converse? Learn to enjoy passionate Spiritual Sex and your whole life will be transformed. Yes, always the Tantric answer, both are true.

SOLO SEXERCISE: Wake Up Your Passions! Description Right now is the time of your life to let go and feel your passions intensely. Do something every day that gets your juices going, gets your adrenaline pumping. This exercise is really just a reminder to follow your own bliss. Purpose


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To make your approach to every day one where you identify your feelings, recognize what turns you on in all aspects of your life, and choose to act on what brings you the most passion. 1. Start the day ALIVE. Well, waking up really isn't part of the exercise. You'll probably do this most mornings without our help. This is when you want to do this exercise. 2. Tune into your sensations. Even before you get out of bed, feel how you're feeling. What sensations do you have where in your body? 3. Feel your emotions. Think about what you want to do today. Notice your emotional reaction to each. What sensations do you feel where in your body? 4. Make each thought and activity joyous. Even Tantric masters understand that you might choose to do some things occasionally that don't make you feel as wonderful as possible. But look into each thing you choose to do carefully. What can you do to make it easier and more pleasurable? How can you release your own resistance and increase your acceptance? How can you enjoy each thing you do more? Remember the ancient saying about making every aspect of life a joyous meditation: "Chop wood, carry water." 5. Choose passion! The final step in this morning ritual is to choose to do one thing today that will really bring you joy. If you do this, you'll be tuning into your feelings, honoring your emotions, and proving that you love yourself. If you do this regularly, you'll find yourself living a happier life. Sexercise Afterthoughts Practicing passion in all areas of your life will bring more passion in your lovemaking, too! When you combine passion with intimacy and sacred connection, you have a dynamite combination, which is what the next chapter is all about.


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"E" is For Enjoying Pleasure… NOW! The final "E" of YES-BE is Enjoy Pleasure. Tantrikas believe in enjoying life to the fullest. We employ the bedrock activity of Tantric Sextasy , practicing pleasure. Tantric Sextasy is the true art of living where pleasure NOW becomes the central driving force in each moment. As Tantrikas, we begin to cultivate feeling good by fully opening our senses and teaching ourselves to respond to a wide range of stimuli from all our senses. We learn to accept more and more sensation and value it highly. We continue by savoring the excitement it brings. An essential part of this discipline is for you to increase your capacity to enjoy and feel pleasure. Though we believe your natural state is one of lightness, joy, and excitement, like most of us, you've probably been brainwashed out of it, at least most of the time. Consequently, you need to practice to stretch and fully fill your pleasure balloon, that imaginary bubble inside that expands with good feelings. This isn't as easy as it sounds. It requires more than just reserving playtime in your stuffed calendar. You must learn to pursue, generate, and surrender to ecstasy with gusto. You must learn to become the pleasure. Just when you start feeling good, you may find you're conditioned to feel that you're being selfish, doing something sinful, or don't deserve it. Tantrikas don't believe you can have "too much fun." To open to the pleasure available to you, you must release the guilt and resistance that you've learned from birth by learning and loving your truly ecstatic self.


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You may be asking, isn't that simply being self centered? Hedonistic? What about love and relationship? What about morality? Remember, that Tantric Sextasy's focus on pleasure and joy is always toned with consciousness. When you know yourself deeply, you won't be ruled by your unconscious. You'll always act with highest regard for yourself, your lover, and others, for we are all one. Isn't that what love is all about? Tantric Sextasy teaches that, at our core, we are love. Following our bliss inherently drives us to share pleasure with others. We do this because we know that we are all One. That is what brings us joy. For what we do to another, we're doing to our self. And what we do for our self, we do for others.

Deferred Gratification Be Damned! The dictionary defines pleasure as... “A source of enjoyment or delight. Sensual gratification or indulgence.”

You realize now that Tantric Sextasy is a spiritual path creating higher states of consciousness, right? Do you believe that simply being happy is a more evolved state? Tantric Sextasy teaches you to evolve by heightening your senses, loving yourself, and indulging in the gratification your body can bring. This is why sexuality is such a powerful training tool in Tantric Sextasy . It returns you to your natural condition of feeling joyful, feeling good, and feeling fulfilled. In Tantric Sextasy we say that pleasure is central, or in other words... Nothing is more important than that you feel good!

Our modern lives revolve so much around deferred gratification. Work for 40 years and then you can retire and enjoy life. No time to relax now -- wait until next summer's vacation. When the kids grow up, then you'll revive your sex life.


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( By the way, if you wait 20 years to revive your sex life, there may not be one when you get there!) But in the final analysis, why do you do anything if you don't believe it will make you feel better eventually? We ask, why not now? Tantric Sextasy believes there is only the now. The past and the future are games of the mind. Even if you don't sell everything and move to Fiji, we want to encourage you to focus more on what your body is telling you right now. We want you to listen to it. We want more than anything for you to be happy with yourself, your life, and your sex right now. The Tantric Attitude shifts your focus from feeling good in the future to the here and now. This whole approach to life suggests you can just give up any goal orientation. Instead of concentrating on what you want to happen, you enter each experience without expectations and live fully in the moment. Tantric Sextasy teaches you how to extract every ounce of joy from the present moment and use that joy to guide your life.

The Tantric Way of Life In today's world, we take everything so very seriously, whether it's our work, our recreation, or our family. No matter how important they are, these things really aren't a matter of "life or death". We just act as if they are. But there's a different way of living. Living a Tantric life means celebrating life in every moment. Celebrating existence, celebrating breath, celebrating beauty, celebrating Spirit. It's all good. When you shut down your emotions, you stop celebrating. Give that inner critic the boot. You don't need her, she's just holding you back. You were born knowing how to feel ecstatic.


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Feel your ecstatic self, feel your passion, feel the light come into your soul. You've had altogether too much of the struggles of the world around you. Enough! Make some spaces in your life to ignore reality. Find your little inner child who just loves to play and laugh. Go back to that natural exuberance and welcome life as an adventure. Drink it in! Enjoy! Pretend! Fantasize! Use every minute of every day to celebrate your life, your love, your laughter. Dance, sway to the music, beat the drums, feel your heartbeat. When you're feeling joyful, that means you are on the right track for your soul. When you're feeling down, frustrated and unhappy, your inner being (soul self) is saying, "You're not going, doing, or being in the right direction. You need a course correction." That's your inner guidance system talking. Please listen.

Try THIS at Home Every Day to Kick Start Your Tantric Life Celebrate your life everyday. Greet the day with a smile! Did you know a smile causes certain neurotransmitters to be released that actually make you feel better? Look at the trees, the sky, the birds, your pets, your lover and give thanks. There is no better way to celebrate than by giving gratitude. Some make this a daily ritual of prayer but you don't have to offer thanks or prayer to a deity. Simply feeling grateful, giving gratitude to yourself, and offering it to the greater universe is good enough. CELEBRATE your perfection and the miracle of life. If you have children, you can do this easily. If not, think about your lover, your last orgasm, or the last belly laugh you had. Celebrate the flowers in your garden, the fresh wind in your hair, the miracle of sight, and the blessings of love. You can do it, we know you can. You're worth it.


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A simple practice that we tell clients is to create an affirmation such as "I am a loving being living in abundance." Say this affirmation every morning. Maybe even say it two or three times. Feel it in your body. Remember this is your affirmation, so use your own words and make it as grandiose as you feel okay with. At night before you go to bed, write down (yes, I said WRITE) three things in your Sexploration Journal that brought you joy today. These do not have to be huge things. For example, perhaps you watched a butterfly dancing about some flowers. Or maybe you felt the deep peace and joy that came from petting your pet. Maybe you chuckled over a joke you received via e-mail. If you have difficulty remembering three things, do you think it's possible you need to pay more attention or do you need more practice looking for the joy?

Be Pleasure-Focused Being pleasure-focused is severely criticized in normal Western society. You've got your work ethic to uphold, your religious taboos to honor, your prohibitions against being selfish to monitor. Maybe you even have heroes, religious leaders, and spiritual gurus to follow. Better not appreciate someone else's physical beauty in business or you'll be accused of sexual harassment. Don't acknowledge your sexual turn-ons in public or you'll be labeled a pervert. We're making a point here, not advocating inappropriate behavior. Do you realize how often healthy desires are blocked by internal resistance? Often these social injunctions create psychological blocks and are stored in your body. When you try to enjoy yourself and let yourself go, you can't. Your taboos are embedded deeply into your flesh. As a result of these pervasive restrictive learnings, we all have limits to how much pleasure we can accept and feel.


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We're not advocating flashing and playing out your strangest fantasies the moment they crop up. We just want you to be aware of your turn-ons and let them be okay with you instead of letting your ingrained resistances take over, If you're a serious workaholic, died-in-the-wool perfectionist, or conditioned fundamentalist, you may find that you simply don't have the reflexes to settle into feeling good. Your mind gets flooded with thoughts of being undeserving, doing something wrong, or giving to others. These are just some of the mind games that try to talk us out of pleasure. No wonder there's so much unhappiness in our lives and frustration and deadness in our sex lives. The slightest hint of joy is met with strict internal opposition. If you think saying "Yes" to feeling good is an easy way to live or some kind of cop out, just try making pleasure the center of your universe for one day and see what happens. Focus on what feels good in each moment. Keep changing whatever you're doing until you feel joy and pleasure. By the end of the day you will understand this phrase better: "Pleasure is a discipline"

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: Do I Block Pleasure?!? The next time you feel strong pleasure, be extra conscious of your thoughts and reactions. Whether you're enjoying playing with a child, watching a sunset, or engaging in exciting sexual play, watch what happens inside. Ask yourself… •

Are any of my thoughts resisting the delight I'm experiencing?

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Am I feeling any uncomfortable sensations in my body?

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Do I have any urges to tense up or shift out of what's making me feel good?

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Do I think too much? Am I consumed by my to-do list?

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Am I focused on the end, the result? Or on the journey?

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Am I relaxed and accepting of my experience?

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Am I willing and able to accept more pleasure?


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SOLO SEXERCISE: Putting Pleasure First Description Do you accept that nothing is more important than that you feel good? That pleasure is a divine gift you were meant to enjoy? That anything you do, you do because ultimately it brings you satisfaction? Tantrikas put pleasure first. We don't wait until we've earned it, we go for it now. Deferred gratification has little part in our way of life. We believe that our basic nature is one of joy, bliss, and ecstasy. As we become truly evolved, we become truly happy. That's why sex is such a large part of Tantric practice. It's training camp for being a fully realized enlightened, blissful, being. Want to experience stronger ecstasy and deeper intimacy? Then practice expanding your capacity for pleasure. Learn to relax and surrender more. Learn to open your senses and heighten your sensitivity. Learn to absorb, channel, and re-circulate orgasmic energy. Learn to reach higher and higher peaks of ecstasy and wave after wave of bliss. Purpose Here's your chance to test if you're practicing what you're preaching and transform your life to focus on what's most important, that which brings you pleasure. 1. List pleasures. If you've started a Sexploration Journal, use it for this exercise. Otherwise, get a small notebook that you can keep with you. On a new page, list everything that brings you pleasure. Include the favorite parts of your current life, past peak moments, and fantasies you get excited just thinking about. Travel, family, work, sex, art, music -- don't leave anything out. 2. Prioritize pleasures. On a new page, organize your pleasures in order from best to last. Forget about practicality here, just focus on what gets your juices flowing the most. 3. Major activities.


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On the top of next page in your notebook, write today's date. List your major activities down the left side of the page. Don't just list general terms like "work" or "family" but break down your activities specifically enough that you can compare your enjoyment of different things. Do this for at least a typical week. 4. Track your time. Keep track of how you spend your time today. Using hash marks for 15 minute intervals, keep track of all your activities such as sleeping, eating, etc. 5. Total your time. Track how you spend your time each day for a week or more. When you're ready, add up where you spend your life's time. Combine the totals from each day's activities into grand totals. Sleep will probably be the largest single chunk. On a new page, list your activities in descending order of time spent. 6. Compare your desires vs. your efforts. Compare your top pleasure priorities with your top time blocks. Do you spend your time in places and with people that bring you pleasure? Which pleasures do you routinely make time for? Which ones do you ignore or put off to the future? 7. Change for your own pleasure. The only point of this exercise is for you to realize the ways you spend your time. Are you taking time for what you enjoy? How much do you spend on what you don't? Sexercise Afterthoughts To be fully engaged in pleasure is the essential focus of Spiritual Sex, when you choose. Of course, if you want to completely reorganize your life around your findings, be our guest. When Spiritual Sex is your center and you engage regularly in it either by yourself or with your lover, blessings flow naturally. Then sexuality becomes a sacred prayer and a spiritual meditation.


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Your Body - A Divine Pleasure Machine We want you to enjoy the pleasure that's available to you from your body. Members of our society are too quick to accept that sexuality is dirty and undesirable. This is what we teach ourselves and future generations. As a result, many of us continue to be conflicted and repressed sexually. We all have confusions and doubts about the true nature of sexual pleasure. For instance… •

Are we supposed to indulge?

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Do we restrict ourselves in some way?

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Is sex really okay?

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Should I control my appetite so I don't get addicted?

By now we think you know our answers. You've been given, through divine design, the ability to feel ecstatic pleasure. Your body can offer you these divine gifts. Since we are each divine beings, a spark of the cosmic whole, how can sex be less holy or less sacred than anything else one feels and does? Tantric Sextasy believes that sexual or bodily pleasure is a divine blessing, however you receive it: from your lover, from the fantasies in your mind, from your connection to the Divine Presence, or from yourself. Yes, that includes from yourself. If you accept the basic precept of the Tantric Attitude that nothing is more important than that you feel good, then you'll find yourself relishing solo sex, making love with yourself. Of course, we're talking about selfpleasuring with a Tantric Attitude.

How Often Do You Masturbate? Let's face it, most everybody does it. In fact, a recent online poll found out that around 86%


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of us indulge in masturbation regularly but few talk about it. Because our hormones and our minds continuously generate sexual desire, it's natural that the pressure builds up. Younger folks have more of the biological tension. Mature folks who like sex find their minds dwelling on it and their bodies responding. Do you realize how often? A recent study found that men think about sex every three seconds. Of course, the women expected that. But did you know the same study showed women think about sex every six seconds. Half as often, but that's still an awful lot. In other words, we have an ever-present stream of reminders that encourage us to play with ourselves for release. Very sadly, too many of our parents and elders gave us the message that it's bad to touch yourself "down there". In our practice, we have seen hundreds of men and women who aren't yet fully recovered from the verbal and physical punishments when they were discovered masturbating. If this is your background, let Tantric Sextasy heal your shame and guilt as you learn to take great pride in your pleasure, self and otherwise.

Masturbation vs. Tantric Self-Pleasuring In Tantric Sextasy we're not really talking about masturbation, that is, secretly trying to get yourself off as quickly as possible. That's sometimes desirable, we admit. Although there's really nothing wrong with making yourself come, we're just trying to get you to add joyful Tantric self-pleasuring to your list of spiritual practices. We don't want you to stay in the shame-ridden closet of secret masturbation. Wouldn't you rather have more satisfaction, more enjoyment, and more fulfillment from what you're doing already?


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Because the word masturbation has so many negative connotations, we urge you to adopt our Tantric term, self-pleasuring, which means giving yourself sexual pleasure while honoring your body and celebrating pleasure as a sacred gift . If you accept the Tantric premises that... •

You are a child of the Universe,

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All of your body is a divine gift,

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Pleasure is your natural state, and

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Nothing is more important than that you feel good,

then divine self-pleasuring is a completely natural next step. Of course, masturbation and self-pleasuring may look similar from the outside. But when we suggest Tantric self-pleasuring, we're advocating an honoring ritual that doesn't produce guilt. Self-pleasuring with the spiritual intent of honoring yourself and your capacity to experience your joyous blissful nature is a very different thing. And it's not focused on getting yourself off rapidly. It's all about how much of a good thing you can stand. You see, Tantric self-pleasuring doesn't target orgasm. Rather its goal is making yourself feel as good as you can for as long as you want. That means summoning and circulating orgasmic energy for health and pleasure. Spiritual Sex is based on the belief that you're worthy and deserving of feeling good. Do you believe it? Then you can show yourself that you do by acting on these beliefs by giving yourself long-lasting, spirit-bathing pleasure. Are you getting the message that Tantric self-pleasuring is something to be proud of? This means you don't sneak around, hide it, and keep it a secret. On the contrary, you tell your significant other what you did and how you liked it. Then you're in a place of not only communicating openly but sharing the energetic highs when you're next together.


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Come Together With More Juice and Less Guilt We understand that some people in relationships feel all sexual activity should be reserved for their lover. This makes sense if your sex life consists of releasing pent-up energy as quickly as you can. Of course, some partners think they must be undesirable or doing something wrong if you need to self-pleasure. NOT! That's not the Tantric view. Sometimes one partner has more energy than another. Sometimes your lover isn't around when you're up for pleasure or your body needs it. Sometimes you just need alone time to reinforce the foremost spiritual relationship you have, the one with yourself. Of course, if you're not forthcoming about giving yourself pleasure, they have to wonder what you're hiding. If you consume all your sexual energy privately so that there's none left over for your lover, they could feel second best and left out. Use Tantric self-pleasuring the way it's intended -- to make yourself feel good by generating sexual energy, not throwing it away -- and then you'll come together with your lover with more juice, not less. If you're a guy, this means you may not want to come while self-pleasuring if you have a loving, sexy partner.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS: The Art of Self-Pleasuring Here are some questions to answer in your Sexploration Journal, reflect on, or talk about. •

How often do you masturbate and self-pleasure?

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How do you feel about it?

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How open are you about it?

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How does self-pleasuring benefit you?

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How could you make self-pleasuring even better?


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Self-Pleasuring – The Way to Increase Your Orgasmic Potential Few of us have complete sexual training or self-knowledge. We suggest you relish Tantric self-pleasuring in order to extend your orgasmic potential, expand your capacity to feel pleasure, and stretch your pleasure balloon. Self-pleasuring without keeping it a secret or feeling guilty is a great way to take the pressure off your primary sexual relationship. When you self-pleasure with pride and acceptance, it gives you freedom rather than relying on your partner to meet all your sexual needs all the time. It's an essential act of being responsible for your own sexual pleasure. Do you accept that you're 100% responsible for your own turn-on, your pleasure, and your orgasms? You are, you know, no avoiding this truth. Taking responsibility for your own sexual ecstasy means you need to know what works for you. How can you... •

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Quickly find out your responses to what turns you on best? Discover new things about your body, erogenous zones, and orgasmic triggers? Easily and safely experiment with new things?

Solo sex is the most efficient way to find out about your own capacity for sexual ecstasy. When you know what you want and how you want it, it's easier to relax, to feel, and to receive. Without knowing what turns you on, you won't be able to judge how well things are going or to guide your lover when you prefer something different, and to give feedback diplomatically.


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Self-Pleasuring Paves the Way to Various Sexual Practices Self-pleasuring more often can open up new and different orgasmic pathways, including G-Spot orgasms, female ejaculation, and anal play. It's a terrific first step in incorporating new sexual rituals, techniques, and games into your love life. Try it to see if you like it. Then you can more comfortably share what you've discovered with your partner. Playing with yourself will help you know what to communicate with your lover so that you can experience everything you've ever dreamed of. You will share what you’ve learned about your ‘cumming’ and other sexual pleasures with your lover right away, right? If you're orgasmically-challenged or have the tendency to come too quickly, solo sex is a great way to practice being the lover you want to be. For men, Tantric self-pleasuring is the foremost tool for practicing peaking -- coming close to orgasm and backing off -- while spreading the energy as you learn ejaculation mastery. For women, self-pleasuring is the most important tool for learning to be orgasmic or more orgasmic. If all of this hasn't pushed you to the edge of your comfort zone, we might as well suggest the next big step. How about Tantric self-pleasuring under the eyes of your lover? Now there's a powerful declaration of our pride in who you are and your sexual pleasure. Can you think of a better way to teach your partner what you desire, what your body wants, and how to please you both? It really pays off for each of you separately to take some dedicated time to show your lover what you've learned. Though this works better when one of you selfpleasures in front of the other, we hope you'll get to the place where you do Tantric self-pleasuring together. We don't want to deprive either of you of the titillation of making yourself feel wonderful at the same time?


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The Benefits of Self Pleasuring (As If We Need to Convince You!) We believe that feeling good is good, regardless of the source. Whether you're changing your thoughts to feel better or you're changing your behaviors such as increasing your self-pleasuring, we know it's good, and that you deserve it. Tantric Sextasy says, don't hold back, jump into it fully, whatever it is. It's common knowledge that sex is good for health. Energetic sex is good exercise because it gets your body moving and your metabolism boiling. All your systems get a good work-out: nerves, muscles, mind, circulation, respiration, etc. Like an athlete who trains for events, Tantric self-pleasuring keeps your sexual reflexes, muscles, and organs in shape. Our maxim "use it or lose it" certainly applies here. These benefits certainly apply to loving and pleasuring your body regularly. Let's summarize some other benefits of Tantric self-pleasuring. •

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Helps you stay in your body, which takes your mind off your troubles and reduces stress. Revs up your metabolism, which is good exercise and beneficial for overall health.

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Bathes your body in endorphins leaving you relaxed and happy.

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Provides a safe way to relieve built-up sexual tension.

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Gives you valuable information so you can better teach your lover how to please you. Like an athlete who trains for events, it keeps your sexual reflexes, muscles, and organs in shape because you either use it or lose it. Gets you juiced up before a big date or calmed down if you're overly sensitive. If you're orgasmically challenged, or have the tendency to come too quickly, solo sex is a great way of practicing being the lover you want to be. Generates orgasmic energy so you can feel better, increase your capacity for pleasure, and practice feeling more ecstasy. Streams energy from your sex center to your heart and soul invigorating your spirit.


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SOLO SEXERCISE: SEXERCI SE: The Tantric Self-Pleasuring Self-P leasuring Ritual Description How fast you grow as a Tantrika depends in large part on how often you fully enjoy Tantric self-pleasuring. So we're going to make loving yourself an assignment, a spiritual discipline. Do this exercise every day if you want, or at least two or three times a week. Prove to yourself that you're worthy and deserving of sexual pleasure. Reap all the benefits of Tantric self-pleasuring and then share them with your lover. Purpose To learn to enjoy solo Spiritual Sex by Tantric self-pleasuring so you can feel better and learn learn about yourself. yourself. 1. Benefits. First, decide which benefits of Tantric self-pleasuring you want to focus on. Don't pick everything at once as you'll have a chance to choose different benefits later. 2. Make space. Choose a time, place, and setting which are comfortable. Take a bath or shower first. Use candles, incense, music, or whatever turns you on. If you want, do this in front of a mirror. 3. Meditate. If you enjoy sitting meditation, start with a few minutes of getting clear and centered. At least, take a few deep breaths and relax. Settle in and don't rush. 4. Go nude. Sensuously remove your clothing. Acknowledge yourself as a divine being and your intention to give yourself supreme pleasure because you deserve it. If you're in front of a mirror, bow to yourself. 5. Pleasure yourself. Awaken your whole body first. When you're ready, stroke those parts that bring you the most pleasure. Oil or cream makes it more intense. Vibrators and other sex toys can be a welcome addition.


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6. Spread the pleasure. Fill your whole body with delicious sensations. Imagine your lover with you or use fantasy if it helps. Don't rush towards orgasm, just spread the pleasure out and enjoy as long as you want. 7. Experiment. If you've set an intention to discover new things, experiment and see what feels good. 8. Go for it! After extending your pleasure pleasure for as long as you choose, choose, give yourself one or more more orgasms if you want. 9. Savor ever orgasmic quiver. Don't just rush off to other things after your ritual. Relax and reflect on how good you made yourself feel and anything you learned. Feel your body, feel your energy. Journal your experiences with pride, noticing and accepting any resistance that comes up. End with another bow and acknowledgment of yourself. Sexercise Afterthoughts Afterthoughts Later, tell your partner, if you have one, about your experience. For the most impact on your commitment to honoring pleasure, do this exercise in front of each other. Though it's a stretch for many, it can be a memorable turn-on if you've never self-pleasured self-pleasured in front of of each other. Either way, send us your peak experiences or profound learnings to share with others and we'll enter you in a drawing for a free e-course.

YOU are the Tantric Tantr ic Attitude Just Say YES-BE! Now you know what the Tantric Attitude is. Attitude is. Remember YES-BE and what its letters mean... •

Y = Y es, es, reminding you to allow and accept instead of resisting.


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E = Experience now, by watching yourself to raise consciousness. consciousness.

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S = love love your your Self, accepting that your divine nature is good. B = be in your Body, out of your mind and into your senses, feelings, and heart.

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E = Enjoy pleasure, joy, and sexual energy to remember your basic nature.

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Everything in this chapter is vital for enjoying the stellar heights of sacred sexuality and Spiritual Sex. That's why you'll find everyone one of these principles and assignments reappearing again and again. We know that we've suggested some simple as well as some challenging assignments here. Every one is important for supreme orgasmic bliss. We hope you've tried them all at least once and enjoyed them. Even though some of them may stretch you and that's a good thing, don't push too hard. Remember, it's all about pleasure. The end definitely does not justify the means. It's all means. So take what we offer as a smorgasbord of pleasure. Eat what tastes good today, save the other stuff for later when you're hungry for it.

Sex is a Gift and Any Way You Get It Is Good for You Y ou Our aim is to support you in being totally sex positive, which means an attitude and mindset in which you know that sexual ecstasy is a divine gift and any way you get it is good for you. We want you to love filling your pleasure balloon through sexual pleasure, that imaginary bubble inside you that expands with good feelings when you let it. Can you accept the idea that... •

Sex is divine,

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Pleasure is a spiritual path or discipline,

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You were born a blissful blissful being, and That the ecstasy of Spiritual Sex is something you deserve?


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When our students begin studying Spiritual Sex, they often experience programmed, conditioned resistances. Fear, guilt, shame and physical discomfort may arise. We have found over and over that by pursuing pleasure, these negative energies can be cleansed and released. Tantric Sextasy says: be awake, be conscious of what you do, and discover what really feels good, what you really want. Realize your potential for bliss by embracing a sex positive stance.

Believe that Following Your Sexual Desires is Good We know this isn't always easy. You can't grow up in this society without conflicts about your sexuality. Even if your parents were very cool about sex, you still had the attitudes of your schools, teachers, churches, and uptight peers. What to believe? Ultimately, you can only believe yourself. Exploring your own desires, your own psyche, your place in the grand scheme of things. Spiritual Sex practice is a means to that exploration. By confronting one of the most conflicted areas of our life, sexuality, Spiritual Sex can give you new ways of seeing and being. In spite of the sexual repression by our religions, our society, and our general culture, there are pockets of individuals and families that believe sex is truly okay. Spiritual Sex goes a step further and says sex is not only okay, it is a divine gift. Sex is a blessing. We have been given bodies and the ability to experience great pleasure. Can you imagine...


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Revering all of your sexual urges and fantasies?

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Completely enjoying what is yours to enjoy?

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Believing that you are a child of the universe and are therefore very special, very god-like?

Tantric Sextasy can help open the door to a new way of relating to life, your love, and your pleasure. You begin by adopting a sex positive Tantric Attitude. Be all you can be, be Tantric, adopt the Tantric Attitude, be sex positive!


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