Coaching and Mentoring Guide

Coaching and Mentoring Manual Prepared by

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Coaching and Mentoring Manual © 2009, Workplace Performance Technologies (Pty) Ltd

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Workplace Performance Technologies (Pty) Ltd

All enquiries should be addressed to: Workplace Performance Technologies (Pty) Ltd PO Box 925 Lanseria Gauteng South Africa 1748 Tel: +27 (0)861 (0)861 967 5463 Fax:+27(0)866846216 E-mail:[email protected] URL: http://www.workinfo.com Disclaimer Whilst every effort has been made to ensure that the information published in this work is accurate, the editors, publishers and printers take no responsibility for any loss or damage suffered by any person as a result of the reliance upon the information contained therein. This information is not intended to create, and receipt of it does not constitute, an attorney-client relationship. Users should not act upon this information without seeking professional legal advice. © 2008, Workplace Performance Technologies (Pty) Ltd

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INTRODUCTION:

7

Why is Coaching & Mentoring So Important?

7

WHAT IS COACHING AND WHAT IS MENTORING?

7

The meaning of Coaching:

7

What does Mentoring mean?

9

Informal Mentoring

10

Formal v informal mentoring relationships

11

DO WE NEED COACHING/MENTORING?

11

The Benefits of Coaching for Organisations

11

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN COACHING AND MENTORING

13

BUSINESS COACHING & MENTORING

13

Executive Coaching & Mentoring

14

Performance Coaching and mentoring

15

Skills coaching & mentoring

15

Personal coaching & mentoring

16

HOW DOES COACHING AND MENTORING MENTORING COMPARE WITH WITH OTHER SERVICES?

17

IS COACHING JUST THERAPY BY ANOTHER NAME?

19

The traditional therapies, psychology and counselling and their relationship to coaching

MENTORING VERSUS OTHER FORMS OF DEVELOPMENT Two schools of mentoring

20

20 21 Page 3 of 55


EXPECTATIONS AND CHARACTERISTICS OF A BUSINESS COACH

22

EXPECTATIONS AND CHARACTERISTICS OF A MENTOR

24

STYLES OF COACHING AND MENTORING

26

Mentoring Styles:

26

‘Letting Go’ Style

26

‘Active Listening’ Style

26

‘Advisory’ Style

26

‘Cooperative’ Style

27

Recognizable Recognizab le Coaching Styles

27

CONTEXT FOR EFFECTIVE BUSINESS COACH OR FORMAL MENTOR Communication:

30 30

INTER PERSONAL COMMUNICATION

30

Transactional Analysis:

30

Ego States

31

Transaction between ego states

31

Complimentary Compliment ary transaction: transaction :

31

Crossed Transaction: Transaction :

31

Ulterior Transaction: Transaction :

32

Strokes and Games

32

ISSUES INFLUENCING INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION

33

Communication Barriers:

33

Personality conflict:

33

Gender Differences

34

Communication Barriers between men & women:

34

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Cultural Differences

34

Cross Cultural Communication

34

‘Politically Correct’ Communication:

34

Emotional Intelligence: Intelligence:

35

TYPES OF COMMUNICATION

35

Face to Face Communication

36

Facial Expressions:

36

Gestures:

37

Posture:

37

Personal space:

37

BUSINESS COMMUNICATION

38

ESTABLISHING THE REALITY

39

FEEDBACK:

40

COACHING FOR RESULTS

43

PERFORMANCE-BASED FEEDBACK

46

PROVIDING POSITIVE FEEDBACK

47

FEEDBACK ON PROBLEM PERFORMANCE

49

GIVING CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK

52

GROW MODEL FOR COACHING

53

Goals

53

Reality

53

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Options

53

Wrap Up

54

POSSIBLE BARRIERS IN COACHING AND MENTORING:

54

SIGNS OF SUCCESS

54

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Introduction: Why is Coaching & Mentoring So Important?

The rate of internally and externally driven change for organisations is likely to continue to increase at an exponential rate. Organisations will continue to move in the direction of not offering a 'job for life' but still wanting to attract and retain high quality staff and managers who can perform in changing circumstances. Mentees will need to equip t hemselves with the necessary skills, knowledge and experience to manage change effectively whilst in a job, and with the vision and insight to be able to manage their careers in a more proactive way. Coaching and mentoring helps both organisations and mentees to address organisational change initiatives by paying full attention to the pa rt people play in this process. Specifically, coaching and mentoring can help to achieve the following necessary elements of an organisational change process: 

Reconciling individuals' goals and attitudes with organisational goals and culture



Providing a challenging but supportive environment for exploring options



The opportunity for individuals to achieve real learning at all levels.

What Is Coaching And What Is Mentoring? The meaning of Coaching:

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Coaching creates the capacity for continuous improvement, development and success, through enabling and supporting people and organisations to make the best use of their knowledge, insight, vision, creativity, sensibility, determination, external resources and vast ability to learn and develop. Coaching recognises the vast potential of human capability, understands what restrains this and how to unleash it and significantly reduces the internal and external ‗interference‘, which exists between potential and their performance. Research and history shows us that individuals and organisations rarely achieve lasting improvement when people are merely ‗told about‘ concepts and practices or ‗made‘ to change.

However lasting and powerful change is achieved when people: 

recognise the need to improve and believe that improvement and achievement are entirely possible



develop clear and compelling goals



identify strengths and areas for improvement in a positive, nonthreatening way, recognising that this will lead to improvement, rather than focussing on ‗criticism‘, ‗failure‘, ‗error s‘ or ‗problems‘



become aware of the current situation from an ‗outside-in‘ perspective

(like moving from inside traffic gridlock to seeing it from above) 

think in an innovative way about solutions



use positive role models of best practice



plan actions in a clear and concise manner



focus with determination on implementing and maintaining the identified change



recognise and reward success in achieving the goals

Coaches achieve the above by applying leading-edge continuous improvement and development tools and techniques on a one-to-one (in person or via the Page 8 of 55


telephone) or group basis. Coaching is centred on goals. It focuses the individual or organisation on moving forward and achievement, rather than dwelling upon past behaviour and ‗failures‘ (it is not counselling).

Coaching is not a casual discussion; it is hard work! Through Coaching the organisation or individual completes tangible actions – small steps which add up to the overall goal. This approach makes Coaching very well suited to the challenges of the modern corporate environment. At its best, Coaching is ‗non -directive‘: it does not teach, advise, and seek to

control people or impose solutions. Rather, it enables people to use their internal and external resources to pursue their goals effectively. This technique is at the heart of successful Coaching and differentiates it from consultancy, training, traditional teaching and traditional management (and most sports ‗coaching‘!).

Research and practice have shown that this approach achieves sustainable positive change, enabling organisations and individuals to achieve and maintain goals that they had previously thought were not possible. The success of these techniques has led to Coaching being used in a considerable number of areas both in and outside of the corporate environment, including personal development, change management, performance management, communications, team development, and career development, personal wealth, stress, relationships and, most recently, lifestyle and work/life balance changes. Coaching is used to overcome many traditional individual and organisational barriers to sustainable improvement and change.

What does Mentoring mean? "Mentoring is to support and encourage people to manage their own learning in order that they may maximise their potential, develop their

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skills, improve their performance and become the person they want to be." Eric Parsloe, The Oxford School of Coaching & Mentoring

The term originates from Greek mythology, in which it is reported that Odysseus, when setting out for Troy, entrusted his house and the education of his son – Telemachus - to his friend – Mentor. “Tell him all you know” Odysseus said, and thus created a valuable pe rsonal development tool …..and unwittingly set the limitation that Coaching overcomes!

Mentoring is a powerful personal development and empowerment tool. It is an effective way of helping people to progress in their careers and is becoming increasing popular as its potential is realised. It is a partnership between two people (mentor and mentee) normally working in a similar field or sharing similar experiences. It is a helpful relationship based upon mutual trust and respect. A mentor is a guide who can help the mentee to find the right direction and who can help them to develop solutions to career issues. Mentors rely upon having had similar experiences to gain an empathy with the mentee and an understanding of their issues. Mentoring provides the mentee with an opportunity to think about career options and progress. A mentor should help the mentee to believe in him/herself and boost his/her confidence. A mentor should ask questions and challenge, while providing guidance and encouragement. Mentoring allows the mentee to explore new ideas in confidence. It is a chance to look more closely at yourself, your issues, opportunities and what you want in life. Mentoring is about becoming more self aware, taking responsibility for your life and directing your life in the direction you decide, rather than leaving it to chance.

Informal Mentoring

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When a person recognises a set of values, actions, believes and or outcomes of another person, they can then model their own behaviour on the visible actions of this chosen person. The relationship is of an informal nature – not set up in a formal manner by any party, the mentee would normally approach the would be mentor personally and ask for a mentorship relationship. Characteristics: 

Goals are not defined



Outcomes are unknown to both parties



There may be no communication



Mentors may not be aware that they have been selected



No direct training / support is necessarily given



Outcomes are not always measured

Formal v informal mentoring relationships Formal mentoring relationship setup by employer and informal mentoring relationship is an initiative by mentee, in order to peruse career, which could be same as mentor have. The advantages of an informal relationship are that it is likely to be stronger and have a deeper element of friendship. Some studies also suggest that the quality of the mentoring is likely to be higher. The disadvantages include, it is much more difficult to find a suitable mentor, and there is typically less clarity of purpose – relationships often drift into simple friendships, because neither party is clear what they want to achieve from meeting.

Do We Need Coaching/Mentoring? The Benefits of Coaching for Organisations Page 11 of 55


Corporate Coaching is used in a number of different ways to achieve real value for the organisation and its people, including: 1. Achieved performance goals at organisation, team and individual levels 2. Improved effectiveness and efficiency 3. Successful change 4. More effective leadership 5. Improved teamwork and partnership working 6. High impact communication 7. Implementation of robust and valuable performance management and continuous improvement systems 8. Maximising the investment in formal training (the International Personnel Management Association‘s research into training and development showed that, following training, mentee productivity increased by just over 22%, whereas training combined with coaching produces an increase in productivity of 88%) 9. Increased motivation and positive orientation to work 10. Improved critical decision making 11. Greater creativity 12. Reduced stress 13. Improved time management 14. Improved work/life balance and workforce health 15. Greater self awareness, self confidence, self esteem and insight into personal development Having a mentor can be one of the most powerful developmental relationships you will ever experience. For example, four out of five chief executives say that having a mentor was one of the keys to their success. Hundreds of thousands of people from all walks of life and at all stages of their careers are able to point to deep, personalised learning they have obtained from a developmental relationship with someone of substantially greater experience, who has taken a direct interest in them. Powerful, often transformational mentoring relationships have helped young graduates find their feet in an organisation, helped mothers of young children return to work, or enabled young offenders to turn their lives around. People coming up to retirement have been eased through this difficult time, by tapping Page 12 of 55


into the experience of others, who have been through it already. In short, mentoring can help anybody, who has a major transition to make in his or her life, whoever or wherever they are.

The difference between coaching and mentoring As can be seen above, there are many similarities between coaching and mentoring! Mentoring, particularly in its traditional sense, enables an individual to follow in the path of an older and wiser colleague who can pass on knowledge, experience and open doors to otherwise out-of-reach opportunities. Coaching on the other hand is not generally performed on the basis that the coach has direct experience of their client‘s formal occupational role unless the

coaching is specific and skills focused. Having said this, there are professionals offering their services under the name of mentoring who have no direct experience of their clients' roles and others offering services under the name of coaching who do. So the moral of the story is, it is essential to determine what your needs are and to ensure that the coach or mentor can supply you with the type and level of service you require, whatever that service is called.

Business coaching & mentoring Organisational development, changes brought about by mergers and acquisitions as well as the need to provide key mentees with support through a change of role or career are often catalysts, which inspire companies to seek Page 13 of 55


coaching or mentoring. At one time coaching and mentoring were reserved for senior managers and company directors, now it is available to all as a professional or personal development tool. Coaching and mentoring are also closely linked with organisational change initiatives in order to help staff to accept and adapt to changes in a manner consistent with their personal values and goals. Coaching & mentoring, of which focus on the individual, can enhance morale, motivation and productivity and reduce staff turnover as individuals feel valued and connected with both small and large organisational changes. This role may be provided by internal coaches or mentors and, increasingly, by professional coaching agencies. Coaching and mentoring programmes generally prove to be popular amongst mentees as coaching achieves a balance between fulfilling organisational goals and objectives whilst taking into account the personal development needs of individual employees. It is a two-way relationship with both the organisation and the mentee gaining significant benefits. There is also an increasing trend for individuals to take greater responsibility for their personal & professional development and even those who a re employed in large organisations are no longer relying on employers to provide them with all or their career development needs. There has been an increase in the number of individuals contracting coaches and mentors on a private basis. Some are looking for a career change, but many are also seeking to maximise their potential with an existing employer or achieve greater ba lance with their work and home lives.

Executive Coaching & Mentoring There is a great deal of overlap between business and executive coaching or mentoring. Many people will offer either service, but there is a growing body of professionals in the market who are calling themselves executive coaches and mentors and are differentiating themselves in the marketplace. The key differences between business and executive coaching and mentoring are that Executive coaches and mentors typically…

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Have a track record in professional and executive roles Work exclusively with the ‗high-flyers‘ or with those who have potential

to be a high flyer Work at board or CEO level within high profile or ‗blue -chip‘

organisations Offer total confidentiality Work with potential 'captains of industry' and high profile business leaders

Performance Coaching and mentoring Many coaching clients will seek coaching or mentoring for performance enhancement rather than the rectification of a performance issue. Coaching & mentoring have been shown to be highly successful intervention in these cases. When an organisation is paying premium rates for development services, performance is usually the key pay-back they are looking for. Even if an executive or manager receives support in balancing work and home life, it wil l be with the aim of increasing their effectiveness and productivity at work and not for more altruistic reasons. Performance coaching derives its theoretical underpinnings and models from business and sports psychology as well as general management approaches.

Skills coaching & mentoring Skills‘ coaching has some commonalities with one-to-one training. Skills

coaches & mentors combine a holistic approach to personal development with the ability to focus on the core skills a mentee needs to perform in their role. Skills coaches & mentors should be highly experienced and competent in performing the skills they teach. Job roles are changing at an ever increasing rate. Traditional training programmes are often too inflexible or generic to deal with these fa st moving requirements. In these instances one-to-one skills coaching allows a flexible, adaptive ‗just-in-time‘ approach to skills development. It is also possible to apply skills coaching in ‗live‘ environments rather than taking people away from

the job into a ‗classroom‘ where it is less easy to simulate the job environment.

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Skills coaching programmes are tailored specifically to the individual, their knowledge, experience, maturity and ambitions and are generally focused on achieving a number of objectives for both the individual and the company. These objectives often include the individual being able to perform specific, well-defined tasks whilst taking in to account the personal and career development needs of the individual. One-to-one skills training is not the same as the ‗sitting next to Nelly‘ approach to ‗on the job training‘. What differentiates it is that like any good personal or

professional development intervention it is based on an assessment of need in relation to the job-role, delivered in a structured (but highly flexible) manner, and generates measurable learning and performance outcomes. This form of skills training is likely to focus purely on the skills required to perform the job function even though it may adopt a facilitative coaching approach instead of a 'telling' or directive style.

Personal coaching & mentoring Personal or ‗life coaching‘ is growing significantly in the UK, Europe and

Australia. Personal coaches may work face-to-face but email and telephone based relationships are also very common. These coaches and mentors operate in highly supportive roles to those who wish to make some form of significant change happen within their lives. Coaches offer their clients a supportive and motivating environment to explore what they want in life and how they might achieve their aspirations and fulfill their needs. By assisting the client in committing to action and by being a sounding-board to their experiences, coaching allows the individual the personal space and support they need to grow and develop. The coach's key role is often is assisting the client to maintain the motivation and commitment needed to achieve their goals. In many cases personal coaching is differentiated from business coaching purely by the context and the focus of the programme. Business coaching is always conducted within the constraints placed on the individual or g roup by the organisational context. Personal coaching on the other hand is taken entirely from the individual's perspective.

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How does coaching and mentoring compare with other services?

Traditional forms of training

Coaching/mentoring

. Wholesale transfer of new skills,

. Development activities are

e.g. change in procedures, new

designed to suit client‘s personal

systems (e.g. software

needs (whether aspiration or

application training), new job

performance related) and learning

function.

styles.

. Programmes are mostly generic

. Fine tunes and develops skills.

and not tailored to individual needs. Delegates generally have

. Can focus on interpersonal skills,

to complete standard modules, so

which cannot be readily or effectively

there is little room for tailoring

transferred in a traditional training

the programme to account for

environment.

existing knowledge, skills or preferences.

. Provides client with contacts and networks to assist with furthering

. Not always sufficiently similar to the ‗live‘ working environment to

ensure effective skills transfer. . Best suited to transfer of knowledge and certain skills rather than the development of personal qualities or competencies

their career or life aspirations. . Performed in the ‗live‘ environment or off-line. . Highly effective when used as a means of supporting training initiatives to ensure that key skills are transferred to the ‗live‘

environment. . Coaches and mentors transfer the skills to the client rather than doing the job for them.

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Counselling

Consultancy

. Explore personal issues and

. Focus is on developing

problems through discussion in

organisational practices, processes

order to increase understanding

and structure.

or develop greater self. Role generally more strategic and

awareness.

often used to instigate and design . The aim of counselling is to lead

broad ranging change programmes

the client toward self-directed actions to achieve their goals.

. Consultancy frequently involves expert advice about specific issues

N.B Coaching and counseling share

and organisational processes.

many core skills. However, professional counselors work with

. Consultants are often brought in to

personal issues in much greater

provide specific ‗solutions‘ to

depth than would generally be

business problems and needs

explored within a coaching context.

. Consultant leads the job for the organisation: whilst up skilling the mentee/client may be a contractual part of the service, it is not generally the primary goal. N.B. The term consultant coach is often

used when the coach is external to the organisation and therefore offering services on an ‗external‘ or ‗consultancy‘

basis. This is not, however, the same as consultancy per se. Coaching and mentoring has been offered by consultancy companies for many years, even though it is not specifically ‗consultancy‘ It is only

recently that people have begun drawing a distinction which in some cases, like the distinction between coaching and mentoring, is not useful in Page 18 of 55


distinguishing between them.

Is coaching just therapy by another name? Coaching is not ‗therapy‘ by another name although the key theoretical

underpinnings, models and techniques found their origins in the field of psychology and associated therapies like gestalt & cognitive behavioural therapy which have broad ranging applications in both organisational and personal contexts. The key difference between coaching and the therapies is that coaching does not seek to resolve the deeper underlying issues that are the cause of serious problems like poor motivation, low self-esteem and poor job p erformance. Coaching and mentoring programmes are generally more concerned with the practical issues of setting goals and achieving results within specific timescales. Coaching and mentoring is generally commenced on the premise that clients are self-aware and ‗whole‘ and have selected coaching or mentoring because they do not require a therapeutic intervention. It is possible for someone who has underlying issues to experience success within a coaching context even if the underlying issues are not resolved. If, however, a client becomes ‗stuck‘

and the coaching or mentoring programme is not achieving desired results, then a psychological or therapeutic intervention may be necessary for the client to move forward and achieve their goals. Coach & mentor training programmes which are typically quite short are not aimed at qualifying coaches to conduct an assessment of whether someone may be in need of a therapeutic intervention, rather than a coaching or mentoring one. This is driven in part by the professional restrictions and barriers that have traditionally been placed around psychology and the therapies, but is mostly due to the fact that psychological assessment is a complex process that does require specialised training. Professional coaches & mentors do, however, stay ever alert to the possibility that a cl ient may have or may develop issues or problems for which coaching or mentoring on its own, is not sufficient. Client progress is always monitored and coaches and mentors watch for signs Page 19 of 55


which may indicate that a client requires an assessment by a trained therapist. Some coaches will on-refer a client to an appropriate therapist if this is felt to be useful. Other coaches will conduct a coaching programme in pa rallel with a therapeutic intervention. Most coaches & mentors are keen to maintain the professional boundaries between coaching & mentoring and the traditional therapies and will collaborate with therapists when a client requires this form of intervention.

The traditional therapies, psychology and counselling and their relationship to coaching Because of this relationship between coaching and psychology & the therapies, some professionals offering coaching services are, in fact, therapists or psychologists who are marketing their services under the names coaching and mentoring. This means it is possible to offer the appropriate level of service depending on immediate needs and client preferences. This also has the benefit of transcending some of the negative conceptions of wha t these services involve. Services of this nature can often be found under the terms positive or coaching psychology to make it easier for clients to find service providers who take a psychological focus within their work as a coach. For an explanation of coaching psychology as an area of practice see www.coachingpsychologist.net/WhatIs/Index.php Anyone seeking life improvement, and who is willing to work at the deeper issues, should consider contracting a coach or mentor who does have a traditional therapeutic background in the first instance. If the client is not sure if they have issues that would benefit from a therapeutic intervention are encouraged to secure professional an assessment by an appropriately qualified person.

Mentoring versus other forms of development Mentoring is often confused with coaching, or teaching, or counselling. In practice, a mentor may draw on all of these approaches, but they are not the same as mentoring, as the chart below indicates. Page 20 of 55


Focus

Coach

Teacher

Counsellor

Mentor

Task and

Knowledge/

Building self-

Building

performance

information

awareness

capability

and selfconfidence Key skill(s)

Giving

Instructing/

Listening,

Helping

feedback on

explaining

questioning

learner

observed

discover

performance

their own wisdom

Goal-

Sets or

Passing a

Helping the

Works with

orientation

suggests

test

person cope

learner‘s own

on their own

goals

Low

Relatively

goals for the learner Closeness

Moderate

Low

of the

high, often

relationship

becoming a strong friendship

Flow of

One-way

One-way

One-way

Two-way, Adult

learning

Learning.

Two schools of mentoring

Structured mentoring, in which people are encouraged and supported in developing and sustaining mentoring relationships, emerged as an important movement in the early 1970s, in the United States. This early model was aimed primarily at high-flying young men in business organisations and emphasised the role of the mentor as sponsor and protector of the younger person‘s career. In this approach, the junior partner in the relationship is

typically described as a protégé – someone to be protected. When the concept spread to Europe a decade later, it very quickly changed to one, which emphasised empowering people to take charge of their own Page 21 of 55


development and career momentum. In this approach, the mentor‘s

accumulated experience and wisdom is not necessarily passed on directly – it provides a background, from which the mentee builds their own. Mentors also expect to extract significant learning from the relationship, too. The less experienced partner is typically referred to as the mentee – although a variety of other terms, such as mentoree are also used.

Expectations and characteristics of a Business Coach The goal of a business coach should always be to help draw out leadership capability in individuals he is associated with. A business coach must make an effort to help the business executive learn about how to design and link specific leadership challenges, assuming complete responsibility to overcome the challenge successfully. A business coach must take the following steps first, before introducing them with the leadership and problem solving aspects: Take into account the work culture and the talent of the team, by partnering first with the CEO or business head and the HR team. The mentoring should go on for as long as the business coach is not completely satisfied with the performance of the participants. The aim here is to coach the executives in such a way that they are aware of every aspect of leadership and problem solving skills. Companies hire business coaches to improve the performance of the team, both, collectively as a team and individually. After the completion of the coaching session an executive should have a better understanding of individual and organizational behaviour. He should be able to comprehend the key changes that are required for his transition from manager to leader. The six characteristics that are indispensable requisites for a successful business coach are:

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1. Strong Belief :

Coaches need to have a very strong belief system, a vision of the future, a positive approach to every problem and a strong understanding of themselves. This they need to pass on to the managers, who lack these basic leadership skills. 2. Optimism:

This is an absolutely essential trait for a leader. It is a trait that sets apart the managers from leaders and the coach himself should have this ap proach on life and business, to teach others. 3. Courage:

The coach has to hardwire this virtue in managers. He has to prove to them that although we all have our own fears; the main thing is to learn how to overcome them in the best possible way. 4. Teamwork:

This is a very important point to remember. It is preached everywhere, but seldom practiced. The coach should himself know how to work within a team. Everyone knows that leaders cannot do everything by themselves and so they have a team of individuals with different talents. He has to guide the team in such a way that each talent is fully utilized and the team feels good about using their talent. 5. Good preparation:

Always prepare and go through your content before you start implementing them on the participants. The content needs to cover all the aspects of the subject, from basic skills to designing and implementation of leadership ideas. 6. Clear communication:

The most important of all traits is effective communication. Managers don‘ t essentially become leaders because they cannot communicate their ideas to the management and their team effectively. A business coach is not only responsible for polishing the communication skills of the participant, but also on how he speaks and conveys management strategy to the participants.

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Expectations and characteristics of a Mentor Not everyone can be a great mentor, after all. The most successful mentors are going to be those people who want to share their experiences, their knowledge, the skills and the solutions that they've discovered for common issues that come up on the job. Those who are going to be fantastic with being a mentor will have an innate understanding that sharing what they know with a new hire puts them in a position of power rather than someone who has the sense that knowledge is power. In order for someone to be a great mentor, he or she needs to be comfortable with the work that they are doing. A great mentor sees himself or herself as a part of a team, and is consistently committed to making a difference, to being dependable and reliable - especially when that means that it's a good idea to consider another way of doing things, a method that might be more logical or intuitive. In other words, mentors need to be willing to do more than just teach their experiences, they must be willing to learn from others around them including their mentees. While mentors lead by example, not every leader is a mentor. Some of the best leaders lead by instructing others, by engaging those who follow them and by expecting others to simply embrace their way of doing things. Great mentors, on the other hand, lead by showing that there's always more to be learned. Mentors lead from within their team not from outside of it. Of course, mentoring programs do foster an environment in which others can become mentors. Some of the best mentoring training comes simply from being mentored and recognizing the benefits of mentoring programs. By working with a great mentor who is inspiring, reliable and consistent, those who are looking to develop mentoring skills will be able to get a sense of whether or not they're interested in becoming a mentor and what they may need to work on in themselves to become better at their jobs, more effective in their lives and to, in time, grow to mentor others.

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The most important characteristic that mentors share is the willingness to lead by example and to focus on the ways in which differences will make the company stronger. Some of the best mentors are going to find that those who they have mentored move beyond them in the company or become better at the job than the mentor himself or herself. There is a strength that is a part of being a mentor that not everyone has; however, developing those strengths is something that will benefit the mentor, the mentee and the organization overall. The qualities which are essential in an effective mentor include: A DESIRE TO HELP

Individuals who are interested in and willing to help others. HAVE HAD POSITIVE EXPERIENCES

Individuals who have had positive formal or informal experiences with a mentor tend to be good mentors themselves. GOOD REPUTATION FOR DEVELOPING OTHERS

Experienced people who have a good reputation for helping others d evelop their skills. TIME & ENERGY

People who have the time and mental energy to devote to the relationship. UP-TO-DATE KNOWLEDGE

Individuals who have maintained current, up-to-date technological knowledge and/or skills. LEARNING ATTITUDE

Individuals who are still willing and able to learn and who see the potential benefits of a mentoring relationship. DEMONSTRATED EFFECTIVE MANAGERIAL (MENTORING) SKILLS

Individuals who have demonstrated effective coaching, counselling, facilitating and networking skills. Page 25 of 55


Styles of Coaching and Mentoring Mentoring Styles: ‘Letting Go’ Style Getting into the conversation by: Giving time to let things develop. Waiting for things to happen in a natural way. Avoiding an over-emotional approach Avoiding rush and pressure.

‘Active Listening’ Style Getting into the conversation by: Asking questions when things are unclear. Checking things by summarizing. Being reserved in giving your own opinion. Giving space to the mentee. Showing that you understand the mentee.

‘Advisory’ Style Getting into the conversation by: Giving suggestions for good problem solving. Advising as an objective outsider. Giving alternatives so that the mentee can make a choice. Giving advice expertise based „Prescribing’ Style

Getting into the conversation by:

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Taking responsibility for solving the mentee‘s problems.

Offering instructions on how to handle problems. Being convincing and persuading. Requiring improvement and if necessary holding out the prospect of consequences.

‘Cooperative’ Style Getting into the conversation by: Striving for a joint vision. Involving the mentee in problem-solving. Giving space to the opinion of the mentee. Appreciating equality in contributions. Being focussed on cooperation.

Recognizable Coaching Styles Coaching can pave the way to company growth and increased profit, or speedier advancement and higher income. The coaching styles listed here have been developed by countless business and personal coaches over the years. Coaching concepts are simplified and broken up into bite-sized chunks using real-world examples. The knowledge and sense of achievement that a good coach or mentor can bring to your life and to your business will contribute to your bottom line year after year; it will also lay a critical foundation for future business and personal success. There are 30 coaching methods or styles in current use.

Let's take a look at each of the 30 coaching styles — A business coach, like a sports coach, may be authoritarian, cooperative or advisory. This is their personal style, but the types of coaching available are far more varied than that and each of the following methods, or models, can be Page 27 of 55


applied in an authoritarian, cooperative or advisory manner. 1.Traditional Coaching Model — Where the coach empathizes and feels what the client feels, acting as a confidant and guide. 2. Intermediate Model — Where the client wants the coach to collaborate on developing goals and on achieving them. 3. Advanced Coaching Model — Where you want to make a substantial break from your past, to try new things and new ways of doing them. 4. Integrity Coaching Model — This model works like a diagnostic tool, separating wants and needs. 5. Block Removal Coaching — When you find yourself resistant to growth it's like a block, caused by limiting beliefs, or hidden fears. This model will unblock the flow of energy. 6. Personal Evolution Model — Development gives you more of what you have. With evolution, you actually become a different person - by changing your environment. 7. Innovation Coaching Model — This model centers on innovation, experimentation and creativity. 8. Attraction Coaching Model — As you add value to your life, you attract feedback and opportunities. 9. 3-D Coaching Model — This model works on Who you are, What you want, and How to get it. 10. Linear Coaching — Set the goal, create the plan, take action, and hold yourself accountable. 11. Personal Foundation Model — Works on boundaries and standards. The higher you want to go, the deeper your foundation must be. 12. Extreme Self Care Model — Finding life too complicated? This may be for you - it means redesigning and simplifying your life. 13. Bigger Thinking Model — Challenge your assumptions, expand your thinking, and break out of your comfort zone! 14. Vision Coaching Model — Identify a trend, extrapolate it out into the future (the vision), then decide to take advantage of that trend today. 15. Distinction Coaching — Re-orienting from an old way of doing something to a new way of doing something. 16. Paradigm Coaching — Understand the current set of assumptions and Page 28 of 55


values, then look at the trends. If the game has changed, prepare to change with it. 17. Solution Coaching — Recognize symptoms, discover the source of the symptoms, find a solution. 18. Corporate Coaching — Most companies don't have a single vision. When the corporate vision is clear, everyone understands and benefits. 19. Zen Coaching Model — Surrender to what is happening, accept it and find balance. 20. Leap Coaching Model — Challenge yourself to something that is far bigger than you are used to - take Massive action. 21. Grace Coaching Model — Having faith in yourself, being generous to others, and finding the joy in accomplishing great things. 22. Paradox Coaching — In this model, one learns to recognize conflicts, understands both sides without trying to resolve them, and succeeds within the paradox. 23. Shift Coaching Model — When you cannot see how to achieve your goals, sometimes a shift in thinking is required. Step back, inquire, shift, and move forward on a new track. 24. Recovery Coaching Model — Used when recovering from business failure, family loss, etc. Instead of denying it, resisting it, or hiding it, accept it and move on. 25. Deep Coaching — Our basic beliefs can gradually shift over time until they are no longer true. Digging deep will find the 'out-dated truth' which can then be aligned with today's reality. 26. Strategic Coaching — This model identifies real opportunity, helps you decide the role you will play, creates a game plan and monitors the action taken in carrying out the plan. 27. Performance Coaching Model — For the competitive client. Develop a compelling goal; create milestones to keep yourself focused on the goals, build momentum with daily reporting. 28. Turnaround Coaching — In this model you will go digging for problems, determine causes and effects, restore integrity, and then establish new goals for the turnaround. 29. Quality of Life Coaching — Dissatisfied with life? Job not fulfilling? Fulfillment comes from living your values, so this model calls for a rePage 29 of 55


evaluation. 30. Acceptance Coaching Model — Most people try to overcome a weakness, rather than accepting it and using it to their advantage. Acceptance Coaching provides the answer.

Context for effective Business Coach or Formal Mentor Effective Coaching and Mentoring needs a skills set to ensure that you get to maximum effectiveness. The skill set required includes the following: Communication Establishing the Reality Feedback

Communication: Communication skills simply do not refer to the way in which we communicate with another person. It includes many other things - the way in which we respond to the person we are speaking, body gestures including the facial ones, pitch and tone of our voice and a lot of other things. And the importance of communication skills is not just limited to the management world, since effective communication skills are now required in each and every aspect of our life.

Inter Personal Communication Transactional Analysis:

Transactional Analysis is a theory developed by Dr. Eric Berne in the 1950s. Originally trained in psychoanalysis, Berne wanted a theory which could be understood and available to everyone. Transactional Analysis is a social psychology and a method to improve communication.

Page 30 of 55


The theory outlines how we have developed and treat ourselves, how we relate and communicate with others, and offers suggestions and interventions which will enable us to change and grow. TA includes 3 major areas that are –Ego States, Transaction, and Strokes & Games.

Ego States

Parent Ego State – characterized by domineering, over

protective & loving, stern and critical. It is illustrated by those who establish standard and rule for other. Adult Ego State – In this people attack problems in a cool

minded rational manner. In adult state information is gathered, carefully analyze it, generate alternative, and make logical choices.

Child Ego State – submissive & conforming, insubordinate,

emotional, joyful, or rebellious. Characterize by very immature behaviours.

Transaction between ego states

Complimentary transaction: It shows 3 possible complementary. Transactions are complimentary if the message sent or behaviour exhibited by 1 person ego state receives the appropriate and expected response from the other person ego state.

Crossed Transaction: It is occurs when message sent the

behaviour

exhibited by the 1 person‘s ego state is reacted to by an incompatible and

unexpected ego state on the part of the other person.

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Ulterior Transaction: They are very damaging to interpersonal relation because it always involves at least two ego states on the part of 1 person. Individual may say one thing but mean quite another.

Strokes and Games

Strokes: It means simply that beginning in infancy and continuing throughout

their lives, people need cuddling, affection, recognition, and praise. People don‘t get positive strokes when they will seek out negative strokes. The strokes

are divided in to two categories:

Positive



Negative

Games: Games are set or pattern of transactions that have surface logic but Page 32 of 55


hidden meaning and attempt to drawing in an unsuspecting participant. The outcome of the games is always a win - lose proposition. Interpersonal communication deals with relationships between people,

usually in face-to-face private settings. Interpersonal communication is the primary way through which

relationships are created, maintained, and changed Uses of Interpersonal Communication 

Give and collect information.



Influence the attitudes and behaviour of others.



Give and receive emotional support.



Form contacts and maintain relationships.



Make sense of the world and our experiences in it.



Make decisions and solve problems.

ISSUES INFLUENCING INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION Communication Barriers: In its journey from one person to another, information encounters a whole range of obstacles that can alter, change or completely block out the message. These are called ―Barriers‖ and include assumptions, distractions, discomfort,

language, jargon, anxiety or jargon.

Personality conflict:



Each of us has a unique way of interacting with others.



Personal opposition always based on : o

personal dislikes, Page 33 of 55


o

personal Ego states,

o

personal disagreements,

o

different personality styles.

Gender Differences Communication Barriers between men & women:



Difference in style of conversation.



Both have different mind set, priorities and principles.



Ways of dealing with the same situation are very different.



A research shows that Men use to talk to emphasize status whereas women use it to create connection.

Cultural Differences Cross Cultural Communication 

Barriers caused by differences among perception.



Barriers caused by tone difference.



Barriers caused by semantics.



Same word means different things to different people.



Barriers caused by word connotations. Words imply different things in different languages.

‘Politically Correct’ Communication: 

How do you describe a person who is ‗wheelchair bound‘ (as

handicapped or physically challenged) 

Similarly, a blind or visually impaired,



Elderly or senior,



We must be sensitive of others feelings.



Should choose politically correct word. Page 34 of 55




Words might have the same meaning but politically correctness refers either words are soothing or hurting someone.

Emotional Intelligence: Intelligence Quotient (EQ), describes an ability, capacity, or skill to perceive, assess, and manage the emotions of one's self, of others, and of groups. As a relatively new area of psychological research, the definition of EI is constantly changing. Emotional Intelligence is increasingly relevant to organisational development and developing people, because the EQ principles provide a new way to understand and assess people's behaviours, management styles, attitudes, interpersonal skills, and potential. Emotion-related abilities should help people choose the best course of action when navigating social encounters. For example, the ability to decode facial expressions of emotion can help one to evaluate how other people respond to one‘s words and actions, yielding important information for adjusting one‘s

behaviour (Nowicki & Duke, 2001). The ability to use emotions to guide thinking can help one to consider both emotions and technical information when evaluating an interpersonal problem. The ability to manage emotions should help individuals experience and express emotions that contribute to favourable social encounters, in part through emotional contagion (Hatfield, Cacioppo, & Rapson, 1994).

TYPES OF COMMUNICATION

Communication can be divided into two categories: Internal External

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Face to Face Communication When communicating face-to-face, body language plays a vital role in conveying the appropriate messages. Eye Contact:

In the business culture, it is imperative to make eye contact if one wishes to make a positive impression with guests and maintain a relationship based on trust. Consider the following: 

Maintain eye contact without staring, as this is arrogant and threatening.



Avoid blinking too much as this communicates nervousness and can be interpreted as an indication of dishonesty



Try to keep eye level on the same level as the guest. Stand if the guest is standing. If the guest is seated, accommodate this by standing back a little.

Facial Expressions: Be aware of facial expressions when speaking to people. Professional service providers who deliver excellent service have alert, lively and appropriate facial expressions.

Avoid the following facial expressions: 

An expressionless or deadpan face showing no emotion in response

to what guests say makes them feel uncomfortable. This may be interpreted as boredom, rudeness or indifference. 

An arrogant or stern expression creates the impression of being

superior to others. 

Grinning continually makes one look stupid. It creates the impression

of misunderstanding what is being said or done. It may also create the impression of being deliberately unhelpful.

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Gestures: Head and hand movements are common during speech: Smooth and wide gestures with palms facing upwards, are warm and welcoming. People react positively to friendliness and helpfulness. Guests are naturally drawn to people who use calming gestures. Sharp, short gestures with palms facing downwards, are aggressive and negative. People react by wanting to either dispute or avoid. When upset or if there is a need to discuss problems, gestures should be controlled. Problems are never resolved through aggressive gestures

Posture: The way the speaker stands, sits or walks, indicates a great deal about the speaker‘s attitude, m ood and self-

esteem. A correct posture entails the following: 

Stand upright with arms comfortably at sides



Keep shoulders dropped and slightly back



Stand with feet slightly apart to maintain balance



Walk briskly because it creates a professional impression



Sit upright with shoulders back. Slouching looks lazy



When speaking to guests, either face them or turn the body slightly sideways towards them



Avoid leaning against walls or furniture



Avoid folded arms – they create the impression of being shy or arrogant



Standing with hands on hips looks arrogant



Swinging when speaking to people suggests a lack of self-confidence



Resting the face on hands while leaning on counters looks lazy.

Personal space:

This refers to the space each person has Page 37 of 55


around him/her and into which intrusions are unwelcome. The exact size of the area around each person differs and depends on a variety of factors including, personality, culture, family background and even the type of sport played. Shy people usually need a wider personal space than outgoing people do. People instinctively indicate when their space is invaded - they either move away slightly, look uncomfortable, blink their eyes to show their discomfort, or look behind the speaker to avoid eye contact.

Business Communication Business is conducted through various channels of communication, including the Internet, Print (Publications), Radio, Television, Ambient media, Outdoor, and Word of mouth. Business Communication can also refer to internal communication. A communications director will typically manage internal communication and craft messages sent to mentees. It is vital that internal communications are managed properly because a poorly crafted or managed message could foster distrust or hostility from mentees. There are several methods of business communication, including: Web-based

communication

-

for

better

and

improved communication, anytime anywhere... E-mails, which provide an instantaneous medium of

written communication worldwide; Reports - important in documenting the activities of

any department; Presentations

-

very

popular

method

of

communication in all types of organisations, usually involving audiovisual material, like copies of reports, or material prepared in Microsoft PowerPoint or Adobe Flash; 

Telephoned meetings, which allow for long distance speech;



Forum boards, which allow people to instantly post information at a centralized location; and Page 38 of 55




Face to face meetings, which are personal and should be succeeded by a written follow-up.

E-mail: Electronic mail—often abbreviated as e-mail or email—is a method of

exchanging digital messages, designed primarily for human use. A message at least consists of its content, an author address and one or more recipient addresses. Email systems that operate over a network-rather than being limited to a single, shared machine-are based on a store-and-forward model in which email computer server systems accept, forward, deliver or store messages on behalf of users, who only need to connect to the email infrastructure with their personal computer or other network-enabled device for the duration of message submission to, or retrieval from, their designated server. Rarely is email transmitted directly from one user's device to another's

Establishing the Reality Both coaching and mentoring are processes that the mentee to achieve their full potential. Facilitate the exploration of needs, motivations, desires, skills and thought processes to assist the individual in making real, lasting cha nge. Use questioning techniques to facilitate the mentee‘s own thought processes in order to identify solutions and actions rather than take a wholly directive approach: 

Support the mentee in setting appropriate goals and methods of assessing progress in relation to these goals



Observe, listen and ask questions to understand the mentee‘s situation



Creatively apply tools and techniques which may include one-to-one training, facilitating, counselling & networking.



Encourage a commitment to action and the development of lasting personal growth & change. Page 39 of 55




Maintain unconditional positive regard for the client, which means that the coach is at all times supportive and non-judgemental of the client, their views, lifestyle and aspirations.



Ensure that mentee develop personal competencies and do not develop unhealthy dependencies on the coaching or mentoring relationship.



Evaluate the outcomes of the process, using objective measures wherever possible to ensure the relationship is successful and the client is achieving their personal goals.



Encourage mentee to continually improve competencies and to develop new developmental alliances where necessary to achieve their goals.



Work within their area of personal competence.



Manage the relationship to ensure the client receives the appropriate level of service and that programmes are neither too short, nor too long.

Feedback: Follow the Guidelines for Effective Interpersonal Communication

There are fundamental strategies that should always be part of interpersonal communication in the work place. Don‘t personalize the situation or behaviour, concentrate on the facts.

Be considerate and respectful of the other person. Develop productive alliances with others in the work place. Be an example. Don’t personalize the situation or behaviour, concentrate on the facts:

By focusing on facts, you minimize blame, reduce defensive reactions, and encourage cooperation. In difficult or negative situations, Avoid using ―You‖ statements and making judgements. Let’s look at ways . . . Let’s talk about . . . Page 40 of 55


Get the facts about the situation. Don‘t blame or point fingers. Focus on the issues, not the person. “You vs. I” statements ―You‖ statements tend to be received defensively—they blame, judge, and

assume things that may not be true. ―I‖ messages let the mentee respond with his or her perspective on the situation. “YOU did this.” “This is what I observed.” “YOU shouldn’t have done that.” “Here’s how I think . . .” “YOU must be crazy.” “It’s important that we talk about this.”

Simply beginning a statement with the word ―I‖ doesn‘t make it an effective statement. “I feel frustrated when you don‟t get your reports to me on time.” Vs. “I feel frustrated when I don‟t have the reports in time for the 2:00 meeting.” Be considerate and respectful of the other person.

Mentees work best when they feel they are making a contribution to the client and the company. Each person needs to feel confident that they can do the job. As a supervisor or manager, the confidence you show (or don‘t show) in your

mentees affects their performance. It‘ s important to give positive feedback to others in the organization based on

their efforts, as well as their results. Show them that you believe they have the ability to do the job well. Say ―Thank you‖ to others to show your appreciation for the contributions they

make to the organization. Remember . . .

How you say something is as important as what you say! Notice your nonverbal communication —body language, facial expressions, gestures. Page 41 of 55


How

you say something is SIX TIMES as important as

what

you

say.

Instead of giving orders, make requests Look at the following phrases: ―You‘ll have to take this to George.‖ ―You‘ll have to have it ready in time for the meeting.‖

Communication is made up of three parts — 55% non verbal—expressions, gestures 38% tone of voice 7% actual words Any time you tell someone they ―have‖ to do something, he or she usually reacts with the ―3 Rs‖: Reluctance Resentment Resistance

Only when you want to do something will you do something voluntarily. That is why it is important to change orders into requests or recommendations. 

What part of your job is the most exciting to you?



How much freedom do you have to perform this part of your job in your own way?



Does the amount of freedom you have contribute to your motivation and satisfaction with this part of your job?



What was the last task you gave to one of your mentees?



Did you allow your mentee the amount of freedom to determine the best way to perform that task as you enjoy?



What could you have done differently?



What difference might it have made? Page 42 of 55


Develop productive alliances with others in the work place.

Collaborative relationships are more successful than adversarial ones. Good relationships reduce stress, build trust, and help you g et the job done. Take advantage of opportunities to show your co-workers and others you work with that you are interested in them. Be courteous and appreciative. Treat them the way you want to be treated. Handle small problems while they‘re small—don‘t let them build into bigger

problems. Keep focused on the future. It might feel good to unload occasionally, but generally it‘s not worth it. Keep the goals of the organization in mind, and continue to develop collaborative relationships between co-workers, departments, and governing agencies. Be an example.

What you do is often more important than what you say.

“Actions speak louder than words.” In your Coaching/Mentoring role, your actions show others: 

The priorities of the organization and your work group.



How to deal with change.



How to consider department goals and objectives to make good decisions.



Whether it is worth the risk to suggest improvements.



What you value.



The way you handle situations and issues is looked at by others as a guide to what you think is important and what is important. Mentees model their behaviour based on what they see you do.

Coaching for Results Coaching is frequent, specific feedback is designed to raise the level of performance. It has many important applications and functions: Page 43 of 55


To improve poor performance Look for patterns in the mentee’s behaviour. If you see a performance problem or a potential performance problem, determine if the mentee understands what is expected, what obstacles might be preventing good performance and whether there is a lack of skills, training, or motivation. To maintain standard performance

Give praise to keep performance on track. If the mentee wants to expand skills, allow for appropriate training. To encourage mentees to exceed performance standards 

Praise to keep performance on track.



Provide training to expand skills.



Mentor for increased responsibility.



Assign special projects, if possible.

To assist mentees in developing new skills 

Provide training.



Give feedback to reinforce learning.



Effective coaches help others to achieve results by building on the ir strengths,



Developing their skills, providing encouragement, and increasing their confidence. It requires getting the mentee to examine his own performance and find ways to improve performance. Coaching uses informal work progress, discussions, formal performance reviews, a nd workday ―coachable moments.‖

1. Identify opportunities to help another mentee improve his or her skills, knowledge, and abilities.

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Learn to identify coaching opportunities and act on them—person asks, is struggling or stuck, expresses the desire to improve, has a negative attitude, etc. 2. If the person doesn‟t seem to be ready, show why improvement will benefit the individual‟s development and the team or company, but don‟t force the issue.

Would you be interested . . .? Would you like to discuss . . .? 3. Ask questions to clarify the situation. Encourage the mentee to analyze his own performance. The mentee‘s input might give the coach new information about the problem. Ask “How much . . .” or “What happened as a result . . .” questions rather than “Why” questions.

4. Help the person come up with possible solutions or actions. Assist in developing concrete action plans Minimize defensive reactions by having the mentee participate Give the mentee a better feel for how he‘s doing “What steps could you take . . .?” “What actions can you think of . . .?”

5. Arrive on a course of action agreeable to both of you. Show how their ideas might affect their performance Give other options to consider Reinforce positive ideas “What are you going to do . . .?”

6. End on a positive note. Show that you have confidence in the mentee Offer your support. Don‘t take over for the mentee, let them take responsibility .

Task-Specific Communication

In many instances, an mentee‘s ability to achieve outstanding performance depends on how effectively supervisors communicate on distributing tasks. This Page 45 of 55


is a very complex subject, involving orienting the mentee to the work group and responsibilities, training, and providing on-going guidance and direction, as necessary. When specific projects or tasks are distributed, supervisors are well advised to use the following model: 

Describe the scope and requirements of the job to be completed. This communication orients the mentee to the project, providing parameters.



Describe timelines, deadlines, and schedules. Any project or task that is time dependent should be planned with the mentee to identify periodic and/or final deadlines and to schedule necessary resources.



Describe the attributes or characteristics of the project. Mentees need to know what the task‘s outcome or project outcome should look like. For experienced mentees, this definition may be enough for them to complete the work. Less experienced mentees, or mentees learning new tasks, may need more guidance to specify the various elements of the work.



Describe resources that will be available for the task. If the mentee is on his/her own, the mentee obviously needs to know that. If the mentee will be working with others, he/she needs to know that. For some tasks, mentees may need to know the budget assigned to the job, or staffing levels for the job.



Describe the rationale or reasons for each of the above elements. For example, a scope may be defined in a particular manner because a client has to work within certain software configurations or hardware requirements (all Mac, all PC, for example). A deadline may be necessary because a system conversion will occur.

Performance-based Feedback Performance-based feedback should be balanced; it should reflect the array of activities, behaviours, and progress mentees have made related to their work

Page 46 of 55


assignments and responsibilities. Feedback can reflect positive performance, competent performance, or needs improvement performance. In any of these cases, it should be direct, specific, and reasonably assessed. Frequent, specific feedback is designed to raise the level of performance. It has many important applications and functions:

To improve poor performance Look for patterns in the mentee’s behaviour. If you see a performance problem or a potential performance problem, determine if the mentee understands what is expected, what obstacles might be preventing good performance, and whether there is a lack of skills, training, or motivation. To maintain standard performance

Give praise to keep performance on track. If the person wants to expand skills, allow for appropriate training. To encourage mentees to exceed performance standards

Praise to keep performance on track. Provide training to expand skills. Mentor for increased responsibility. Assign special projects, if possible. To assist mentees in developing new skills

Provide training. Give feedback to reinforce learning.

Providing Positive Feedback Rarely do mentees receive more than enough feedback, let alone more than enough positive feedback. Conditioning theory and practical experience tell us that positive feedback and praise produce more of the desired behaviour. For Page 47 of 55


mentees learning new tasks or doing good work, providing positive communication is invaluable to continuing the learning or good work. Here are some examples of positive communication that is specific, constructive, and reinforcing : “I want to thank you for the work you’ve done on … The user reports that their productivity has greatly improved since you worked on their tracking system.” “Good work on improving the proposal. You have done a much better job of assessing your audience, defining problems, and developing specific, doable recommendations.” “It has been difficult learning this material. It’s clear to me from your application reviews that you’ve got a good eye for the details of the application process. That will help our clients.”

These simple statements, which do not cost any money to give, will produce positive results in productivity and future quality work. Give praise 

For improvements in performance.



Frequently and honestly, not reluctantly.



As soon after the performance as possible.



Sometimes privately, sometimes, publicly; depending on the



mentee and the circumstances.



As often as it is deserved.



Fairly and consistently.

Notice Improvements!

For people trying to change behaviour or improve their learning, reinforcement is critical. People often do not know whether they‘ve made the right decisions or performed correctly unless they receive guidance or feedback from others. Your job as a mentor is to Page 48 of 55


help people, especially when they‘re trying to make changes, know

they are improving. “I noticed that you made some significant changes in your proposal from the last time. These are good changes. Your sentences are shorter, your word choice is simpler, and your statements better supported.” “I can see that you’ve worked hard to reduce the number of errors in this process. It looks like your double checking has brought the error level to zero. Great improvement ”

Without consistent, fair reinforcement and positive verbal feedback, people will revert to their comfortable behaviour, not necessarily because they do not want to perform capably, but because they aren‘t sure what that is.

Feedback on Problem Performance Analysing Problem Performance

Sometimes employees have on-going performance problems that require analysis as to their source, reason, and resolution. The following questions will help you to define critical issues related to performance problems: 1. What is the mentee doing wrong? 2. What specific behaviour do you want from the mentee? 3. Is the problem worth dealing with? 4. Does the mentee know what is expected? 5. Does the mentee know how to do what you want done? 6. Are there obstacles (work or personal) which prevent them from performing at the level you want? 7. Does a negative consequence follow good performance? 8. Does a positive consequence follow bad performance? 9. Could the mentee do it if they wanted to? 10. How does the mentee performance affect others? Page 49 of 55


11. What are the consequences to the mentee if poor performance continues? Use the Willing / Able – Unwilling / Unable Matrix

Your performance evaluation process may benefit from figuring out whether your problem performer has a ―willingness‖ or ―ability‖ problem. Look at the grid below: The mentee is: Willing and able

Willing, but unable

What characteristics demonstrate this


condition?

condition?

Unwilling, but able

Unwilling and unable



condition?

condition?

Your solution to mentee performance problems will depend on whether the mentee has the ability or willingness to do the job. If the mentee cannot do the job because he/she doesn‘t have the skill, your solution will be more

training and skill development. If the mentee can do the job but will not, you will have to discern the obstacle to performance.

Guidelines for Constructive Feedback in Difficult Situations :

After answering your planning questions, you are ready to use your best communication skills to have your feedback session with the mentee. Show that your intentions are constructive, not critical. “I’m concerned about the completion of your project. I want to make sure I’m

doing everything I can to help you make the deadline.” Use “I” statement strategies. Describe your observations. Page 50 of 55


Point out the difference between what you have observed and the standards you agreed on. “The due date is next Wednesday, and from what I can tell, it looks like it’s

going to slip by about a week.” Tell how the behaviour or action affects you, the work group, and the company.

Be specific, objective, timely, and honest. Focus on behaviours or actions, not the person. “If you miss the deadline that will be a problem for the user who’s relying on

the system changes before the end of the month.” Ask for a response.

Use listening and questioning skills to reach a mutual understanding of the problem. When you get excuses, show understanding, but get the discussion back on track. Distinguish between reasons and excuses. “What do you think about this problem? What ideas do you have to meet the deadline?”

Use acknowledgment and clarification skills to make sure you and the mentee are on the same page. Concentrate the discussion on solutions.

Ask for ideas. Focus on the problem, not the mentee. If the person becomes emotional, give them time to calm down. If appropriate, ask for the change you want. If you make suggestions, don‘t come across as an expert. “So it sounds like you think we need to put more resources into…” Tell the mentee what you are going to do and why.

Documentation or formal disciplinary actions should be explained. “We agreed at the beginning of the project that you would keep me informed if

any slips occurred. If you had told me about this earlier, I could have gotten more resources for you sooner, and we wou ldn’t be in this situation. As it is, I have two other projects going that need attention. Since this happened in

Page 51 of 55


the last project we worked on, it’s become a serious issue. I would like to see

immediate improvement in this area, or I will begin the disciplinary process with a written warning.” Agree on an action plan and follow up date.

Get commitment. “So at this point, I will allocate one more person to the project full time. As we’ve discussed, you’ll get back to me tomorrow after you’ve fully assesse d the issue to let me know whether this will be sufficient.” Show that you support the mentee. “It’s important to me that you succeed with this project. I want this to come

out well for you and the user. So tomorrow I want you to come fully prepared with your assessment so we can make sure that we meet the commitment we made.”

Giving Constructive Feedback Feedback is open, honest, timely, two-way communication between people. Frequent constructive feedback in the work place increases performance and provides motivation for continuing improvement. It doesn‘t cost anything to use except taking the time to pay attention to the mentee. Feedback is given to improve performance and encourage goal achievement, not to blame or criticize. “When performance is me asured, performance improves. When

performance is measured and reported back, the rate of improvement accelerates.” --Thomas S Monson The old saying, ―The squeaky wheel gets the grease‖ usually applies to

feedback. The exceptional performers, good and bad , get noticed, and the rest of the workers just plug along. The greatest return for your efforts is in motivating and improving the performance of this 80% of your work force.

Page 52 of 55


Grow model for coaching Goals R eality Options Wrap Up These questions form the basis of a coaching session. They are suggested questions only. It is important to adapt them to your own style. Each coaching session should work through each part of the GROW process.

Goals (Set goals, write them down, and establish what person wants out of the session)      

What do you want to achieve out of this coaching session/ relationship? What are the SMART goals you want to achieve? Why are you hoping to achieve this goal? What are the expectations of others? Who else needs to know about the plan? How will you inform them

Reality (Let them tell their story, invite self assessment, what’s happening, when does this happen, what effect does it have, other factors)     

What is the reality of the current situation? Why haven‘t you reached this goal already ? What is really stopping you? Do you know anyone who has achieved that goal? What can you learn from them?

Options (Brainstorm options, ask – don’t tell, empower, ensure choice, how can you move toward the goal, what has worked in the past, )   

What could you do as a first step? What else could you do? What would happen if you did nothing? Page 53 of 55


Wrap Up (Identify specific steps and any obstacles, write action plan)

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Where does this goal fit in with your personal priorities at the moment? What obstacles do you expect to meet? How will you overcome them? How committed are you to this goal?

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What steps do you need to take to achieve this?

 

Possible barriers in Coaching and Mentoring: 

Culture fit

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Clearly defined goals

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Relationship unsuitable

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Business goals move

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Measurement is not easy

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Meetings are delayed and not held regularly

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Feedback is ineffective

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Lack of responsibility and accountability

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Failure to explore and manage expectations

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Lack of management support

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Over dependence on the mentor

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Suspicion of the mentor/organisation motives

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Politics become involved

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Not enough resources to go around and cost

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No support from the organisation

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No time

Signs of Success 

Behaviour has changed

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Results and goals have been achieved

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Progress and growth

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Forms part of culture

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People guide people = great succession/knowledge Page 54 of 55


Coaching and Mentoring Guide

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